Verily, I say unto you, the foolish man built his castle on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that castle, and it developed a huge problem with bat-people in the basement.
Can’t quite tell what’s going on with his right hand: is the glowy thing resting on the back of his hand, like Spiderman’s web-throwers?
OK, so it’s a Magritte-style floating city on a rock [1] that…blew up for some reason? Is that what happens when you store too many demons in your basement?
There’s something fundamentally goofy-looking about the armless dragon. (Wyvern?) Maybe it’s the way the hind legs are just sort of dangling rather than looking aggressively talon-y.
Perhaps the symbols on the robe indicate the menu, including fish, fowl, crustacean and koala, which he gorged on, causing the indigestion that brought him at the end to The Burning Realm?
(Or as Zappa once put it, “Oh Annie, oh Annie, oh An-u-sol!”[™️])
This cover gives me the impression that he’d just gotten out of the shower when his wife started screaming about a bat(man) getting into the house and he just threw his bathrobe on to deal with it. He was so mad about his shower being interrupted that he accidentally set the castle on fire.
Ooh, that font tips you off to the publisher even before you scroll down.
Blurb: it’s a blend of things including fantasy, but I don’t see any evidence of martial arts, and the landscapes are meh. At least the Realm does appear to be Burning or at least Exploding.
@Tag W: Shouldn’t this have “Ting!” as a tag? Is this our first Wrist-Ting!? I mean, it’s a Ting! shaped light.
@fred (10): !!!
@MelMc: Perfect description. GSS.
@Bruce: everything you said. The bat-dragon-people are ‘armless.
@THX, ARY, fred (3), Michael/Max, Tor, Tat: GSS!
Quite a good start to the week, in both cover awfulness and good comments.
Maybe wrist-Ting did it all by itself and he’s remonstrating with it, like you do when the dog chews up the couch. He’s gonna snatch it with his other hand and shake it silly. BAD TING!
November 1st, 2021 at 9:34 am
“As God is my witness – I will never wear sandals again!”
November 1st, 2021 at 10:51 am
This is like the astrologers’ equivalent to those bizarre Trump “fan paintings.”
November 1st, 2021 at 12:04 pm
You could probably drop him into any random Baen cover background and he wouldn’t look out of place.
November 1st, 2021 at 1:00 pm
Rodeo Red’s Red-Hot, Rootin’-Tootin’ Chili
November 1st, 2021 at 1:03 pm
♫ I fell into a burning realm of fire … ♫
November 1st, 2021 at 1:09 pm
That cover is awful, but why do I have the feeling that it’s accurate to the text within?
November 1st, 2021 at 1:38 pm
@Michael Toland
The book is pretty awful as well, so you’re not far wrong.
November 1st, 2021 at 1:40 pm
I bet the realm wasn’t burning before BRIAN started talking.
November 1st, 2021 at 3:29 pm
‘… a book well worth reading.’
—Barbara Hambly, unknown author of an entirely different book that you’ve never heard of before.
November 1st, 2021 at 3:30 pm
It’s a wrap around.
https://www.etsy.com/listing/986419024/the-burning-realm-art-print-printed-on?ref=shop_home_active_9
November 1st, 2021 at 3:58 pm
Verily, I say unto you, the foolish man built his castle on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that castle, and it developed a huge problem with bat-people in the basement.
November 1st, 2021 at 5:05 pm
Shouldn’t this have a “behind you!” tag?
Can’t quite tell what’s going on with his right hand: is the glowy thing resting on the back of his hand, like Spiderman’s web-throwers?
OK, so it’s a Magritte-style floating city on a rock [1] that…blew up for some reason? Is that what happens when you store too many demons in your basement?
There’s something fundamentally goofy-looking about the armless dragon. (Wyvern?) Maybe it’s the way the hind legs are just sort of dangling rather than looking aggressively talon-y.
[1] https://www.renemagritte.org/the-castle-of-the-pyrenees.jsp
November 1st, 2021 at 5:12 pm
His robe depicts signs of the Zodiac: Libra, the Scales; Pisces, the One Fish; Graculus, the Two-Headed Bird; Kooji, the Koala; Larry, the Lobster…
Thanks to Fred for the whole thing – as this ever sprayed on the side of a van?
November 1st, 2021 at 5:28 pm
He’s got hair, so what, He’s got the PUNCH.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QImBolnTVH8
November 1st, 2021 at 7:16 pm
Just seen the wraparound – so this is Roger Dean trying to get his royalties?
November 1st, 2021 at 8:07 pm
Perhaps the symbols on the robe indicate the menu, including fish, fowl, crustacean and koala, which he gorged on, causing the indigestion that brought him at the end to The Burning Realm?
(Or as Zappa once put it, “Oh Annie, oh Annie, oh An-u-sol!”[™️])
November 1st, 2021 at 10:43 pm
This cover gives me the impression that he’d just gotten out of the shower when his wife started screaming about a bat(man) getting into the house and he just threw his bathrobe on to deal with it. He was so mad about his shower being interrupted that he accidentally set the castle on fire.
November 1st, 2021 at 11:13 pm
Ooh, that font tips you off to the publisher even before you scroll down.
Blurb: it’s a blend of things including fantasy, but I don’t see any evidence of martial arts, and the landscapes are meh. At least the Realm does appear to be Burning or at least Exploding.
@Tag W: Shouldn’t this have “Ting!” as a tag? Is this our first Wrist-Ting!? I mean, it’s a Ting! shaped light.
@fred (10): !!!
@MelMc: Perfect description. GSS.
@Bruce: everything you said. The bat-dragon-people are ‘armless.
@THX, ARY, fred (3), Michael/Max, Tor, Tat: GSS!
Quite a good start to the week, in both cover awfulness and good comments.
November 2nd, 2021 at 12:03 am
With that look on his face, I can guess *something’s* burning, and I’m sure there’s an ointment for it….
November 2nd, 2021 at 12:26 am
You think he maybe just accidentally blew up the castle and released the demons with his wrist-Ting?
“Damn it, do something, Glowy Thing of Ultimate Power! How many poses do I have to strike?”
November 2nd, 2021 at 9:14 pm
Maybe wrist-Ting did it all by itself and he’s remonstrating with it, like you do when the dog chews up the couch. He’s gonna snatch it with his other hand and shake it silly. BAD TING!
November 3rd, 2021 at 2:52 am
@GSSxN: I don’t know about wrist-Ting!
Maybe this dude is point-Ting!
But there is definitely some-Ting! about this cover.
Tag added.