Nov 09

Boom or Bust

Emster comments: Okay class, who can tell me what makes this a Classic Baen Cover?

Published 2000

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.80 out of 10)

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21 Responses to “T’n T: Telzey Amberdon & Trigger Argee Together”

  1. fred Says:

    Together, but not on the cover. Which for BAEN seems ludicrous.

  2. Francis Boyle Says:

    You know, I could do with a good old BAEN explosion just to clear my head after looking at that mess.

  3. JuanPaul Says:

    I think her kneecap is about to explode

  4. Tor Mented Says:

    More than half those dynamite sticks are defective.
    But this cover shows that the artist really knows what Baen readers love most dearly — a keg.

  5. NomadUK Says:

    Ooo! Ooo! Mister Kotter! Mister Kotter! Ooo! Ooo! Ooo!

    … It says ‘Baen’ on the cover!

  6. Max Bathroom Says:

    I hope that’s Trigger Argee on the cover as Telzey Amberdon is in her mid teens, and is probably a bit young to be dressing up in leather for Baen fans…

  7. The Blue Are Coming Says:

    Ginger fondles the bottom of gun, but won’t touch the barrel.

    What a Glock tease.

  8. The Blue Are Coming Says:

    @Tor – Good spot. Prolly a hint as to the quality of prose within.

  9. Tat Wood Says:

    Her left knee is rather higher than her right.

    If that’s Trigger, where’s the broom?

  10. Tor Mented Says:

    @NomadUK: Good eye!

  11. Ryan Says:

    You know the Baen slogan, “If the title is a doozy, on the cover put a floozy.”

  12. Tor Mented Says:

    When the titles contain puns, add some cleavage and some buns.

  13. Bibliomancer Says:

    Baen go boom

  14. Longtime_Lurker Says:

    @Max Bathroom: That does indeed represent Trigger, who is specifically a redhead—Telzey has brown hair and is much younger. But I hope and believe that Schmitz’s Trigger Argee had a bit more style than the floozy on the cover.

  15. Max Bathroom Says:

    @Longtime Lurker
    Thanks. I should perhaps, have taken the fact that she’s fondling a handgun as a tip that she’s Trigger rather than the other character named on the cover…

  16. fred Says:

    More fun than a barrel of K’zin.

  17. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Emster: The answer is — Everything!

    You can guess which one of the girls that is. The less-interesting, more cliche one who fit their cover specs.

    This isn’t a bad book of stories; a couple of them are good. I got it used and promptly out of the house. It might have been on the Paperback Spinner of Shame at the library, even, or possibly on the discard shelves.

    Caveat to above: one of the stories was about neither. “Editor” Flint did a search and replace on a completely unrelated story to rewrite it into a (meh) Trigger story. And it shows. Flint did a LOT of that. They’re only together in one story IIRC, but all of them (plus the ringer) were needed to make one book.

    @Ryan, Tor, fred: GSS!

    @L_L: IIRC, Trigger only bimbo’d up when it was necessary to the mission. She’d never actually work in a leather/pleather onesie and high heels. Especially one so skin-tight she couldn’t hide a lot of weapons and gadgets. She’s a *secret* agent.

    She was such a good spy she and her competitor/love interest could take the place of two completely unrelated characters!

    More factoids over and above the usual: this publisher’s message board actively supported the January 6 treasonous, murderous riot. When it was pointed out, they said “meh” and directed torrents of abuse and death threats towards anyone who objected to an armed mob killing people and attempting a coup.

    As if their reputation wasn’t already bad enough. Now they’re officially the SF house of Q.

  18. Emster Says:

    I have yet to discover if the stories behind this lively cover will be as amusing as the above comments, but the price I paid at the thrift shop was TOTALLY worth it!

  19. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Emster: It won’t be nearly as amusing as we are.

    If that’s Trigger, where are Roy and Dale?

    Telzey is smarter and has a very cool pet.

  20. Lars of Mars Says:

    It seems entirely appropriate that when I first saw this cover yesterday, the Random Terrible Cover was “Welcome to the Monkey House”.

  21. A. R. Yngve Says:

    See me fly out from the planet
    On your Baen paperback
    Out for all that I can get
    If you know what I lack
    Women to the left of me
    And aliens to the right
    I sure got a gun
    I sure got a knife
    Don’t you start no fight
    ‘Cause I’m
    (T.N.T.) I’m dynamite
    (T.N.T.) And I’ll win the fight
    (T.N.T.) I’m a power load
    (T.N.T.) Watch me sell loads…

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