Jun 15


Emster comments: Lord of the Rings – a Space Musical!

Tag Wizard comments: And that brings Emster Week to a close. A round of terrible applause!

Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.27 out of 10)

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16 Responses to “East of the Sun, West of the Moon”

  1. Steve S Says:

    Lunar eclipse then.
    What’s that hanging out of the tusky ones right nostril(I think it’s his nostril)?

  2. fred Says:

    Far, far south of a good BAEN cover.

  3. Francis Boyle Says:

    I think we’ve left kiss cam far behind.

    Sorry, but there’s no way this is not the cover of some futuristic interspecies porno.

  4. Cygnia Says:


    Oh, John Ringo, NO!

  5. Tat Wood Says:

    Tom Cruise sees eye-to-eye with an Ugnaut.

  6. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Nice nose ring, alien.

  7. fred Says:

    In space everyone will hear you dock, whether they really want to or not.

  8. Leak Says:

    Okay, so what we have here is probably an artist that

    a) played too much WarCraft and WarCraft II as a kid, and

    b) when asked what they wanted to be when they grew up answered “A BAEN COVER ARTIST!!1!eins” in an instant…

  9. GSS ex-noob Says:

    GSS, Emster! All worthy additions.

    @Steve S: I was trying to figure that out myself, so thank you for pinpointing the location.

    @FB: Spot on.

    @Cygnia: Excellent job making the obligatory quote. It really fits here.

    @Tat: He looks more like a Gamorrean to me, which means Little Tommy’s standing on a box if that’s so.

    @BC: He’s a hipster alien, and the apoplectic dude is yelling about how back in his day, that wasn’t so, and the alien is all “You’re obviously not my dad, so I’ll do whatever I want with my own face!” while contemplating using those tuskers to bite his nose off. Seriously, you can HEAR this cover.

    @Leak: Good eye. That is damn well copyright infringement, or at least a shameless ripoff. Guess they’re aiming at that audience* plus a smidge of Star Wars with the Gamorrean. I suppose the Mouse/ActiBlizz thought it wasn’t worth deploying their squads of attack lawyers.

    *Of course. The permanent 13 year olds who like simple plots and bad writing. It’s Ringo — who helped write his local convention’s Code of Conduct so that everything he and his gang does from racist/sexist “jokes”, actual sexual harassment, to death threats is A-OK. As opposed to real CoC, which give the victims support and the abusers thrown out of the con and sometimes banned from attending that con ever again.

  10. Bruce A Munro Says:

    Once again, a discussion of the last season of _Game of Thrones_ goes pear-shaped.

  11. Steve S Says:

    Oh, it’s a nose ring. Thanks for that.

    I am guessing the fact that one them has been eating garlic, isn’t the other ones biggest objection at the moment.
    Or is it?

  12. Daard23 Says:

    @Tat: I guess Tom Cruise really can’t handle the tooth!

  13. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Emster: Can you tell us if it was embossed and shiny? In the olden days, they always were, but since BAEN!!!aliensspaceshipsviolencesexismviolence is a bunch of cheapskates, I’m thinking now they just fake it with aggressive drop shadows on the lettering.

    Note the first line of text at the top. Don’t Ringo and his ilk hate that paper for being woke or PC or whatever their kneejerk buzzword of the week is? And yet… there he is bragging about it on the very tippy-top of the cover. Has he gone soy boy?

    The bottom line amuses me. That ellipsis may be doing a lot of work. Or it may be a polite way of phrasing “if you like his usual shit, here’s more of it.” More fascist, sexist Generic Extruded MilSF Product.

    @Daard23: GSS!

  14. A. R. Yngve Says:

    “Avril Lavigne!”
    “Avril Lavigne!”
    “Why I oughta…”
    “Why I oughta…”

  15. Emster Says:

    @GSS x-n: Hmmmm, there is no “embossiness” on this cover. Now you’ve got me wondering if embossing went out of style…

    @ARY: With help from Avril
    Hey hey, you you, I don’t like your space suit
    No way, Milky way, west of the moon, east of the sun
    Hey hey, you you, I don’t like your space suit
    (bom bom bom-bom bom bom bom bom)

  16. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Emster: I think it probably not only went out of style, but got too expensive what with having to use the extra-thick paper and the shiny ink. Like the cut-out/step back covers. Too pricey for Paperback Extruded Fiction of any genre.

    @ARY: Why, this is hell, nor am I out of it.

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