(Mike) Mars need women. Because I’m pretty sure he isn’t getting any. At least as long as he’s stuck in books like this. (Something tells me this is not Dick Blade territory.)
@Francis Boyle
You’re thinking he has something tucked away down that air hose between his legs because it’s being neglected during his astronaut training?
Who was out to stop Mike from making a successful test in the space capsule?
@Biblo, @Max – Between the capsule sitting on the ground and how-the-heck-is-it-possible-to-have-a camel toe in a space suit, the Mon Calamari rep from the Rebel Alliance disguised in foreground gave Earth a hard pass on a space tech leg-up. Thanks a lot, Mike.
Surely the whole point of tests is that they’re… tests. You can’t decide in advance to have a successful one. If it were possible, Elon Musk would be able to land his Fireball XL5.
Other than the unfortunate background color, this is a blah but inoffensive cover. No anatomical weirdness or inappropriate surrealism.
Although, shouldn’t Mike be on a conning tower, and (since it’s a Gemini) have a buddy? Though apparently the original was, properly, a Mercury. And why are Mike and his craft out on the launch pad when there’s a rocket being fired?
@fred: I’m more uncertain about the Baton Rouge Advocate’s grasp of major differences in plot and character. Mike here seems to strictly be an adult pilot and astronaut, whereas Tom Swift was a jack of all super-scientific trades and a teen. Did Mike buzz around in an Atomicar, gunning down desert Cossacks, or drilling holes into magma? He did not.
@Emster: I see you do not frequent seafood restaurants, else you’d have known that. It is a requirement among my nerd friends that if someone orders squid, at least one person at the table must say “it’s a trap!”
His mom. (She’s worried about her little boy! Why couldn’t he be a doctor or a lawyer or some other job that doesn’t involve sitting atop a giant bomb??)
@GSSxn – sounds like a great tradition to me – I’ll exclaim it loudly next time I’m at a seafood buffet. Pretty sure my sib will get it, too nerdy to care what anyone else thinks.
@Ryan – I’m not sure Mike Mars is cool enough for that theme song, but I like it.
@AR Yngve: you could make fun of how Mike is going to be struggling to get his other leg up into that tiny aperture. Perhaps the dude in the foreground is supposed to help lift him in?
@Me at #15: I caught a rerun of “Wild Wild West” this weekend that did indeed have Cossacks in the desert. Right by those rocks Captain Kirk fought the Gorn at in the same era.
@Bruce: Maybe Mike’s just posing heroically for this shot and then Ackbar’s pal is going to slide him in feet first. Or head first, I’m not old enough to remember Mercury or Gemini boarding procedure.
@Max Bathroom: maybe Mike Mars is a supermarket own-brand knock-off of Mike Mercury from ‘Supercar’. Early Supermarionation characters had a distinct whiff of Larry Parnes pop-star names, before crossing over and hiring a pre-existing band called The Spectrum to impersonate the cast of ‘Captain Scarlet’.
Mike Mars: cheap knock off of Mike Mercury. Less flamboyant and his singing is inferior to Freddie Mercury. Not as tough as American professional wrestler Jerry Mercury (ne Adam Birch).
May 7th, 2024 at 11:42 am
The capsule is about to get right stuffed. There, that one’s out of the way.
May 7th, 2024 at 12:17 pm
(Cape Canaveral)
May 7th, 2024 at 1:00 pm
(Mike) Mars need women. Because I’m pretty sure he isn’t getting any. At least as long as he’s stuck in books like this. (Something tells me this is not Dick Blade territory.)
May 7th, 2024 at 3:14 pm
Apparently the “space” capsule is just sitting there on the ground.
May 7th, 2024 at 3:23 pm
Kenneth Mars at Cape Mardy would be more entertaining.
May 7th, 2024 at 4:10 pm
Mike Mars at Cape Canaveral (Cape Kennedy)
May 7th, 2024 at 4:18 pm
Oh…the Florida Department of Education stops a lot tests.
May 7th, 2024 at 4:24 pm
Mars Needs Women (Females) – https://youtu.be/mz78OECC8zU
May 7th, 2024 at 5:20 pm
Back cover. Wait a minute Baton Rouge Advocate, there is only one Tom Swift and Mike Mars isn’t fit to hold Tom’s tube of pimple cream.
https://www.ebay.com/itm/195622720670
May 7th, 2024 at 5:46 pm
@Francis Boyle
You’re thinking he has something tucked away down that air hose between his legs because it’s being neglected during his astronaut training?
May 7th, 2024 at 6:22 pm
Who was out to stop Mike from making a successful test in the space capsule?
@Biblo, @Max – Between the capsule sitting on the ground and how-the-heck-is-it-possible-to-have-a camel toe in a space suit, the Mon Calamari rep from the Rebel Alliance disguised in foreground gave Earth a hard pass on a space tech leg-up. Thanks a lot, Mike.
(was not nerdy enough to know the correct spelling. Yay for interwebs… https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Mon_Calamari/Legends)
May 7th, 2024 at 6:45 pm
Surely the whole point of tests is that they’re… tests. You can’t decide in advance to have a successful one. If it were possible, Elon Musk would be able to land his Fireball XL5.
May 7th, 2024 at 7:19 pm
@Tat Wood
Elon Musk ain’t no Steve Zodiac: he has worse posture and looks less convincingly human than a Gerry Anderson puppet…
May 7th, 2024 at 11:51 pm
The Full Blurb dept.:
“Don Wollheim is aiming to make his MIKE MARS the Tom Swift of the coming generation and he may well succeed. Then again . . . .”
(thanks for the back cover @fred)
May 8th, 2024 at 1:15 am
Other than the unfortunate background color, this is a blah but inoffensive cover. No anatomical weirdness or inappropriate surrealism.
Although, shouldn’t Mike be on a conning tower, and (since it’s a Gemini) have a buddy? Though apparently the original was, properly, a Mercury. And why are Mike and his craft out on the launch pad when there’s a rocket being fired?
@fred: I’m more uncertain about the Baton Rouge Advocate’s grasp of major differences in plot and character. Mike here seems to strictly be an adult pilot and astronaut, whereas Tom Swift was a jack of all super-scientific trades and a teen. Did Mike buzz around in an Atomicar, gunning down desert Cossacks, or drilling holes into magma? He did not.
@Emster: I see you do not frequent seafood restaurants, else you’d have known that. It is a requirement among my nerd friends that if someone orders squid, at least one person at the table must say “it’s a trap!”
May 8th, 2024 at 6:59 am
His mom. (She’s worried about her little boy! Why couldn’t he be a doctor or a lawyer or some other job that doesn’t involve sitting atop a giant bomb??)
May 9th, 2024 at 6:14 pm
@GSSxn – sounds like a great tradition to me – I’ll exclaim it loudly next time I’m at a seafood buffet. Pretty sure my sib will get it, too nerdy to care what anyone else thinks.
@Ryan – I’m not sure Mike Mars is cool enough for that theme song, but I like it.
July 15th, 2024 at 6:16 pm
Oh, this is just frustrating. The cover is meh. Not enough dumb stuff to make fun of.
July 15th, 2024 at 7:41 pm
@AR Yngve: you could make fun of how Mike is going to be struggling to get his other leg up into that tiny aperture. Perhaps the dude in the foreground is supposed to help lift him in?
July 15th, 2024 at 10:34 pm
@Me at #15: I caught a rerun of “Wild Wild West” this weekend that did indeed have Cossacks in the desert. Right by those rocks Captain Kirk fought the Gorn at in the same era.
@Bruce: Maybe Mike’s just posing heroically for this shot and then Ackbar’s pal is going to slide him in feet first. Or head first, I’m not old enough to remember Mercury or Gemini boarding procedure.
July 16th, 2024 at 5:42 pm
@Max Bathroom: maybe Mike Mars is a supermarket own-brand knock-off of Mike Mercury from ‘Supercar’. Early Supermarionation characters had a distinct whiff of Larry Parnes pop-star names, before crossing over and hiring a pre-existing band called The Spectrum to impersonate the cast of ‘Captain Scarlet’.
July 19th, 2024 at 1:07 am
@TatW( prev.):
Mike Mars: cheap knock off of Mike Mercury. Less flamboyant and his singing is inferior to Freddie Mercury. Not as tough as American professional wrestler Jerry Mercury (ne Adam Birch).
Way less tasty than a Mars bar, too.
July 19th, 2024 at 1:09 am
@Hammy: and he was terrible in the off=Broadway revival of ‘The Producers’.