Apr 11

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Kelly’s Art Direction: Hmmm, a desert nomad with a magic ring and a crazed glare, an aged but fierce warrioress wearing chain-mail long underwear beneath a tunic slit to the waist, and a princely sort who seems to be counting on the other two to protect him since he hasn’t yet drawn his weapons…
Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.48 out of 10)

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23 Responses to “The Seven Towers”

  1. SI Says:

    Clearly they have just walked in on someone naked. The guy in the middle is just shocked, but the other two are loving it!

  2. SI Says:


    “Something there is that feeds on magic..”

    Maybe someone could help me out, I haven’t had coffee yet but that… does it make sense?

  3. Ian Sales Says:

    I like that they got Yoda to do the strap line “Something there is, yes, that on magic feeds, uhmm.”

    Otherwise, it looks just like some random D&D campaign…

  4. Phil Says:

    Madame, as an officer of the Paris Gendarmerie, it falls to me to order that you remove your veil immediately… Ah, Monsieur Sinbad, I didn’t recognise you with your face covered. Please accept my apologies.

  5. THX 1138 Says:

    “Is this the right place for the auditions for Son of Son of The Sheik?”

  6. Carolyn B Says:

    I actually read this book ages ago and have no recollection of its merit, BUT I do remember that Wrede’s “Daughter of Witches” had equally dramatic cover art by the same artist with shiny lens flare…

  7. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Something there is that feeds on magic…”

    Yes, everything sounds more profound if you speak Fantasy. Try it in your daily life:

    – “Looking for the car keys I am, help me find them you must.”

    – “Poop there is in Baby’s diapers, your turn to change them there is indeed.”

  8. Jane Says:

    Sinbad is saying “Halt or I will bedazzle you with my genuine, cubic zirconium ring!”

  9. Evad Says:

    I’ve heard of these guys before: A bunch of mindless jerks who’ll be the first against the wall when the revolution comes.

  10. Jane Says:

    “That’s the one, Officer! The one in the green. She killed my fifth-level paladin.”

  11. Scott Marlowe Says:

    I’m still trying to figure out what the top line means:

    “Something there is that feeds on magic..”


  12. fred Says:

    “Is there something that magic feeds on?” asked the Prince.
    “There is! Something feeds on that magic.” replied the nomad.
    “Feeds on magic? There? That…is…something.” purred the blond tressed warrioress.

  13. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Something there is that feeds on magic…

  14. sed Says:

    I love the look on all three adventurers’ faces.

    Guy in gray robe: “Duh”
    Guy in white: “Du-uh”
    Guy(?) in green: “Duuuuhh”

  15. benny Says:

    ”with this ring, dyslexics untie”

  16. Ian Says:

    Wait, wait… is that nomad really Charlie Sheen? I think he is shouting “I’m Winning….”

  17. arch9enius Says:

    About average computer game box art for 1984

  18. Hep C Says:

    Anyone else noticing something extremely weird going on with the aged green knightess’s legs’ posture?

  19. Jaouad Says:

    What, no comments on the veiled guy’s, er… sword hanging between his legs?

    For his sake, I hope they’re not about to run for their lives.

  20. Hep C Says:

    Nah, I think the magnificent gleam of his wedding ring and the old woman’s sexy dance will be sufficient to scare the enemies away.

  21. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @HepC: everything is flat. All three are standing, and acting, in the same plane.

    If magical the third dimension is, something there is that feeds on magic…

    (Did you see what I did there? Did you???)

  22. AnnaT Says:

    I’ve read this book, and I can confidently state that none of the characters look like these three.

    Also, the old lady knight looks like she’s in desperate need of a toilet. Sinbad in the middle has some real impressive jewellery. And, of course, let us not forget Prince in Grey’s ludicrous facial expression.

    And, who thought it was a good idea to have Yoda write the tagline at the top? Or rather, to have the tagline written in imitation-Yoda? Only Yoda gets to talk like that. No one else.

  23. JuanPaul Says:

    They all seem to have the same face. This happens on several of his covers.

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