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Aug 02

Sci-Fi - sexually awaking teenage boys since the 1960's!Click for full image

Kelly Comments: Considering that later editions have an absolutely gorgeous cover by Michael Whelan, I’m always a bit horrified to see the travesty on my own copy of the book. It looks like a poster for some kind of low-budget 70s bondage. My poor eyes!

Muttley Comments: Did you see a mouse? I’m sure there’s a mouse in here. Gonna blow that mouse away . . .
Published 1981

Thanks to Kelly and Muttley who both sent this in!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.97 out of 10)
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36 Responses to “The Snow Queen”

  1. UnravThreads Says:

    Holy buttocks, Batman! That’s one hell of a bubble butt.

  2. THX 1138 Says:

    Even if this cover is bringing up the rear, it’ll still hit a bum note and be the butt of jokes. I could get to the bottom of this, but I can’t be arsed.

  3. SI Says:

    “Sometimes I wonder, why do we even wear clothes at all.”

  4. Don Hilliard Says:

    She’s looking for her contact lens, just to confirm that Captain Bacofoil’s crotch-bulge really is that embarrassingly small.

    And she’s come prepared to make a day of it, judging by the kebab strapped to her leg.

  5. Tom Noir Says:

    Just another night at the Swedish bondage club!

    I do wonder what the wires on that guy’s wrists plug into, and whether that suspended contraption the woman is seated in is in fact a fetish-themed baby mobile.

  6. Mary Says:

    I can’t help but feel that the fact that no one has their eyes open says all that needs to be said.

  7. Brian Martinez Says:

    I had no idea that Sir Mix-a-Lot once worked as an art director.

  8. Dalton Says:

    The good ole string cuff. I haven’t seen THAT in a while.

  9. UnravThreads Says:

    All glory to the Hypnobutt!

  10. jerk of all trades Says:

    The guard appears to have his eyes open. He’s looking out the corner of his eyes at the queen, resenting her for forcing him to wear such embarrassing clothes — how the hell is he supposed to protect anybody running around in nothing but his tight tighty foilies, male fetish boots, a stainless-steel dickie, bondage bracelets, and an art student’s interpretation of the retard helmet.

  11. Adam Roberts Says:

    Gluteal Show Sir.

  12. James Says:

    If Mistress Badonkadonk and the Snowqueen can’t get a rise out of him, I think He’s kinda sorta Gay

  13. A.R.Yngve Says:

    The same artist also made a similar butt-wielding cover for THE BROTHERS KARAMAZOV. It looked really weird with the Russian brothers mooning the reader…

  14. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    Butt-Woman: Well you see sir, the reason your wife’s hover-car is not working properly is because the oil hasn’t been changed in months. The oil indicator is on showing that the oil is very low.

    Man: Honey, did you not see the light?

    Wife: Ummm….I thought that the indicator light would change to a different colour to tell me that I should now change the oil…

  15. Dan Ryan Says:

    You have to admit, the girl really does have a great ass.

  16. Liz Says:

    LOL!! I had no idea that this cover existed. I love Joan Vinge’s books and own both the old and new cover additions but this…. is horrible!
    The artist must have gotten some bad information about the story or probably never read it. Thank goodness for Michael Whelan.

  17. Silkenfire Says:

    I was a fan of the original cover by Leo & Diane Dillon, myself.
    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_zSMH6b5dlrg/S9kRvibSUDI/AAAAAAAAAOE/diAlrkCZIX4/s1600/1980+dial+press.jpg
    Michael Whelan’s is lovely, too.

  18. FeařofMusic Says:

    ‘I love a girl with a gun in her hand and a party on her mind.’

    If you know where that comes from, please tell me! It’s stuck in my head and I can’t remember where it came from. I HATE THAT!!

  19. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Now, let’s give this cover a second chance. It expresses so much.

    Like for instance, BLEARRRGH, UUURGHH and YEEEECHH.

  20. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘Is she still in the bubble bath?’

  21. Paul Youll Says:

    If you are going to trash the artist get the correct artist before trashing him or her, this cover was not painted by Michael Whelan the signature on the cover tells me it was painted by Peter Jones, that said it’s kind of funny to see some of our worst covers being trashed especially my own, Paul Youll proud to be represented here with a few crappy covers of his own!

  22. Tom Noir Says:

    Is this the book ‘Frozen’ is based on?

  23. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Is it truly true? Can we post again?

  24. Rev Says:

    Her marvellous bottom is in direct contrast with his sad little slug.

  25. Bibliomancer Says:

    This girl sure gets around.

  26. Ray P Says:

    Lady Gaga videos become the founding texts of a future civilization.

  27. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    I notice the absence of snow on the cover.

  28. Bibliomancer Says:

    @DSWBT – Yeah, but we get three queens!

  29. Ray P Says:

    A different kind of snow.

  30. fred Says:

    Snowoueen must be a future version of Halloween only kinkier.

  31. Tat Wood Says:

    I got this edition when it came out and found the cover slightly less embarrassing than the contents. Now I look at it again and wonder: are the lumps on the edge of the magenta trapezeoid thing pine-cones used as a decorative fringe on a rug or people milling about at the edge of a piazza? Or maybe they’re shrubs at the edge of an oddly-coloured lawn.

    If the horizontal lines are equidistant it’s a rug, in which case the Queen must be really hard up if she can’t get a new one with all the pommels/ tassles/ whatever intact..

  32. Ray P Says:

    It adds pleasure when one learns that the woman protagonist’s name is Moon.

  33. B. Chiclitz Says:

    “I’m just going to stand here like a statue until you let me wear the red spiked heel space boots. They go so much better with my outfit than yours!”

  34. Bibliomancer Says:

    This cover deserves to be embiggened and wrap-arounded.

  35. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @B’Mancer—wrap arounded link ne marche. More’s the pity. Embiggened link provides quite an eyeful, and explains Glutonia’s line-of-sight more clearly. Thanks.

  36. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Bow down and twerk before the Snow Queen!”

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