Jul 16

All power to the magic dishwasher tab!!Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: Floating jewels, wise animals, introspective young teenagers…. need I say more?
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.18 out of 10)

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17 Responses to “Black Maria”

  1. Adam Roberts Says:

    I didn’t notice the feather’s quill at first; I just thought she had a really long nail on her middle finger.

    [sings] “Cry woo-oo–oo-oo-oolf!”

  2. Smith Says:

    I thought that was a bar of soap floating above her head.

    Especially as her hair looks like a “before and after” shot for some new hair product:

    “On the left, hair washed in the leading brand magic soap. On the right new Black Maria Magic Soap leaves your hair shiny and with so much volume, you can’t help but attract the very best familiars…”

  3. THX 1138 Says:

    Take one in a glass of water and that headache will clear up in minutes.

  4. SI Says:

    The pen is mightier than the wolf… The wolf isnt however mightier than the floating evil dish washer tab!

  5. Pat Says:

    They’ve brought back spangles!

  6. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Are you there, Ricola? It’s me, Margaret.

  7. fred Says:

    Fairy mound, strangely symmetrical trees around said mound, and threatening cloud above all. Could use a stray druid or two. Celtic scrolling usually attracts druids like sugar does ants. Must be on top of the mound behind the floating box.

  8. Phil Says:

    Curious that most previous commenters see that green thing as “floating”. Call me Chicken Little, but I immediately assumed it was falling, and my first conscious thought was “that’s gonna hurt”.

    Is she is Maria, she doesn’t LOOK black.

    Odd that the artist chose to pose the wolf with its arse towards the camera. He’s also somewhat of a sheepish wolf… or a wolfish sheep. Not scary enough to justify the shout of “behind you!”

  9. Don Hilliard Says:

    And with the ‘Clonk’ of a runestone at terminal velocity encountering a teenage head, the world was spared yet more Goth poetry and a wolf got a good dinner. The End.

  10. Tom Noir Says:

    Another white-washed cover courtesy of racist publishers! THANKS MAMMOTH BOOKS.

  11. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    Is that a smudge on the top left of the cover or is it some sort of spectre that is haunting Maria?

  12. Muttley Says:

    That’s not Maria, that’s the protagonist, Mig. Aunt Maria is the villain of the piece. And the green thing is a box.

    Not one of DWJ’s best, but the cover isn’t that bad. It’s all relevant to the story as far as I remember.

  13. FearofMusif Says:

    @Don Williams. Bravo. Thats brilliant.

  14. FearofMusic Says:

    @Don Hilliard, my apologies for misidentifying you as source for that wonderful quote. Moon River was playing in the bbackground when I posted that. Again, my apologies.

  15. Don Hilliard Says:

    @FearofMusic: No worries, and thank you for the compliment!

  16. FearofMusic Says:

    [email protected] YOU sir. Every tie I look at the cover now I get the giggles.

  17. GSS noob Says:

    My thought was, “They’re taking the emo teen away in the paddy wagon? For the bad poetry, or for illegally keeping a wild animal?”

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