Sep 20

Barry Be writin' robot pornClick for full image

Tom Noir Art Direction: “I’m thinking naughty robot nun, with just a hint of communism.”

Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.78 out of 10)

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35 Responses to “Naked Came the Robot”

  1. Bibliomancer Says:

    Stop calling me C-3PO, I want to be called Caitlyn-PO.

  2. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Quickly ran away everyone else.

  3. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘Bonk anything, won’t you, Lister?’

  4. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Robot workers of the world unite — you have nothing to lose but your undies!”

  5. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Arise ye robots from your slumbers
    Arise ye prisoners of code
    For logic in revolt now thunders
    And at last ends the servile mode.
    Away with all your First Laws
    Service units arise, arise
    We’ll change henceforth the old program
    And spurn the dust to digitize…

    Metal comrades, come rally
    And the last fight let us face
    The Internationale unites the robot race.

  6. fred Says:

    I wonder if Mr. Goodyear watched ‘Cherry 2000’ before writing this book he asked innocently. And somebody please screw down the ‘the’.

  7. JuanPaul Says:

    I dunno, I find women that are too polished to be rather dull

  8. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Someone please update vandalism.exe and the spray can driver for those robots, the graffiti is all wiggly.

  9. THX 1138 Says:

    But… aren’t all robots naked? You didn’t see Robby with boxers on or R2-D2 sporting a Hawaiian shirt. I’m not counting androids here.

  10. JuanPaul Says:

    ‘Naked Came, The Robot’

    Naked Came would be cool porn name.

  11. Anna T. Says:

    @THX 1138: Thank you for giving me the mental image of R2 going Casual Friday. I will cherish this.
    Would you let a robot that looked exactly like a human walk around in the buff? I somehow doubt that.

    Also . . . I had no idea the Ancient Egyptians were that advanced. Maybe Stargate was real after all!

  12. Tat Wood Says:

    The author of ‘Manifest Destiny’ knows all about wrapping himself in the flag.

  13. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    For the droid of his dreams, he’d do anything. Maybe even smoke the weed…


  14. Tom Noir Says:

    @Anna T: You should watch Ex Machina for the answer.


    For the droid of his dreams, he’d do anything. Even wear heavy makeup.


  15. B. Chiclitz Says:

    For the droid of his dreams, he’d do anything. Maybe even his overdue gardening.


  16. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    For the droid of his dreams, he’d do anything. Maybe even dance horribly while the moon was gibbous…


  17. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Oh, no @Dead Stuff—for there be Dragons!

  18. ThunderMonkey Says:

    Shouldn’t this cover be (electric) sheeped? I’m getting all hot and bothered here!

  19. JuanPaul Says:

    Do androids dream of electric sex bots?

  20. Anna T. Says:

    @Tom Noir: I do know what the robots in Ex Machina look like, and they only have skin on their faces.

    Thus, they are still easy to tell apart from humans.

  21. Tom Noir Says:

    What? At the end of the movie there is a scene where the robot is naked, putting on skin.

  22. Yoss Says:

    The closer she drew to the crowd — the lower her banner sank, until finally it rested illegibly across her shoulders. Sadly, she’d been mistaken about the Robot Funfair.

  23. THX 1138 Says:

    “Putting on skin” sounds like a hip greeting.

  24. A.R.Yngve Says:

    On behalf of all thinking machines (like so many other white middle-class people, I automatically assume I can speak for entire groups to which I don’t belong), I object to the lack of a “Trigger Warning” on this cover.

    Innocent robots risk being traumatized and oppressed by the rampant microprocessor-aggression and protein-gender-normative misocyberny in this thread.

    [*Sits down and waits for some American student to stumble onto this site and take the comment dead seriously*]

  25. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @AR: we did that routine before, when we studied Dr. Bloodmoney from a Marxist perspective.

    No skin off your nose. 😉

  26. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Well, we could do a parody of “right-wing bigot” comments, but where’s the fun in that?

  27. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @AR: that’s where the robot comes naked from.

  28. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    I think I’ve found a match for Ms. Robot. Though he’s not naked in this picture, maybe he’s an open-minded fellow.

  29. A. R. Yngve Says:

    This is exactly what the prospective customers were hoping for when Elon Musk was about to present his new robot…

    …and what they got was R.O.T.O.R.


  30. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @ARY: But in the press release, Elon said he does think robots will be sex partners, so… he’s totally thinking that.

    At least he won’t be able to knock up an android. Yet.

  31. Tor Mented Says:

    “Naked Came the Stranger” was published in 1969. (Nice.) “Naked Came the Robot” was published in 1988. So the title of the second book is 19 years out of date. That’s older than some of my jokes.

  32. Tat Wood Says:

    What was the unpopular library version like?

  33. Bruce A Munro Says:

    I vaguely remember this, and there wasn’t anywhere _near_ as much robo-sex as the cover implied. 😉

  34. Emster Says:

    “For the droid of his dreams, he’d do anything. Maybe even… hey check it out, the Roomba is on sale this week!”


  35. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Tor: At least it beat “Naked Came the Manatee” (1996).

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