Jan 16

Nipple targeting program activated....Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Alternate title – “I Got 3rd Degree Burns At 2nd Base”
Published 1971

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.92 out of 10)

Tagged with:

25 Responses to “The Fully Automated Love Life of Henry Keanridge”

  1. Noel Says:

    Bunny broiler presents Great British Bakeoff. I like this new direction.

  2. Bibliomancer Says:

    After checking out her burners, you’ll think twice about popping something into her oven.

  3. THX 1138 Says:

    Men! They want women to be a chef in the kitchen, a stove in the bedroom, a grill in the, er, bathroom… they want you to bring them some food, basically.

  4. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘Ah, hello, dear. Do stand up when my wife enters the room, Carter!’

  5. Ray P Says:

    “You know, for kids.”

  6. Tom Hering Says:

    Playboy is all about
    Big tits and ass.
    The tits are electric.
    The other? Gas.

  7. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:


    Playboy is all about
    Silicone humps.
    The gas that comes out
    Is for roasting rumps.

  8. Francis Boyle Says:

    I’d recommend Space Sheep but I suspect the good ovine has no interest in becoming Space ‘broiled’ Lamb.

  9. Anna T. Says:

    I have to say, a fembot with a built-in stove is new.

    I can only conclude that the artist was hungry when he painted this.

  10. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘We can’t stop here, this is braut country!’

  11. fred Says:

    Wonder what happens if Henry feels like having some sushi.

  12. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Playboy Science Fiction — Brings you to the future world of 2017, where all men’s fantasies come true!”

    Playboy REALITY — the world of 2017, where Playboy Magazine stops featuring nude pinups, men are roundly condemned each day on social media for being sexist pigs, and the President of the United States brags about grabbing womens private parts.

    Please, give us a third alternative…

  13. GSS noob Says:

    @Tom Hering: brilliant!

    Should anyone’s love life involve so many heating units? Red-hot electric bazooms, the end of the road leads to “broil”… I mean, health and safety! This can’t be a UL-approved activity. Third degree burns are not sexy.

    I suppose the artist took “red-hot love” and “burning bosoms” too literally?

  14. Tom Noir Says:

    @GSS noob: Yes, I’m sure editorial discussions about this cover were quite heated.

    @all: It’s great fun seeing what sort of comments people will make on covers after they are submitted. I admit that I had no idea this one would inspire so much… poetry?

  15. GSS noob Says:

    And we didn’t even get into “what’s the thing along the bottom edge, a cannon?” and “why are the stove boobs sideways?”

    a hunka hunka burning love…

  16. Ray P Says:

    Playboy books moving to Ballard country? “Why I want to fuck my Aga.”

  17. L.B. Says:

    Yuck, Yuck, Yuckability;
    Not the beauty of Gas.

  18. fred Says:

    Back cover. I wonder if Mr. Swift knows Henry.

  19. Tat Wood Says:

    @Fred: you mean Tom isn’t really his son?

    I wonder if this was intended as clickbait for the Daily Mail – they’re obsessed with side-boob shots.

  20. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @fred: So if this is Mr. Swift’s “remarkable thing”, apparently he went off in a different tinkering direction than his relative Tom did, she said hotly.

    I mean, I’m HOPING this isn’t illustrating the Bradbury story.

  21. Bruce A Munro Says:

    Judging from the corners of her mouth, this lady is part dolphin as well as part stovetop, or perhaps she’s wearing the top half of someone else’s face atop her own.

    @GSS ex-noob: I’m fairly sure that if there ever was any sex in a Ray Bradbury story, it was decently off-screen. (Or, since I have read quite a bit of Bradbury, very unmemorable. )

    (OTOH, I can immediately think of two Ray Bradbury stories involving disembowelment)

  22. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Those hot boobs were designed by 1950s nuns to condition young catholic boys about the evils of sex.

    “So, Billy, those tempting, luscious globes gave you quite a painful burn, did they? Well, my lad, that’s nothing, nothing at all, compared to the eternal flaming pit that awaits you if you follow the path of sin!”

  23. fred Says:

    Bradbury and sex. Youtube video, a page by page go through of the Playboy Dec 1962 issue containing the Bradbury story. No centerfold, but other nudity cartoon/photo. 13:35 minutes, Bradbury around the 8:00 mark.

  24. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @fred: still no sex in the actual story. The title is a reference to Kubla Khan’s palace, not robo-chicks. (The story “I sing the body electric”, though, does raise some questions. Are we expected to believe the company only constructs electric _grandmothers_?)

  25. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Bruce: They probably lose money on the electric grandmothers, which are subsidized by… what we’re all thinking of.

    I’m thinking the hot babe was constructed out of a multitude of different spare parts from many sources.

    Possibly by @BC’s evil nuns. Burning bazooms, dolphin heads, anything to keep the boys away from the girls.

    @fred: You really *can* find anything on YouTube, can’t you?

Leave a Reply