Apr 12

No I don't want a balloon ride!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Don’t tell me I have to die for these blobs’ sins!

Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.64 out of 10)

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29 Responses to “The Jesus Incident”

  1. Bibliomancer Says:

    The cover to Roald Dahl’s “Jesus and the Giant Testicle”

  2. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Bibliomancer—Thanks for this morning greeting! 😉

  3. Bibliomancer Says:

    @B. Chiclitz – I just call ’em as I see ’em!

  4. B. Chiclitz Says:

    So Frank, Herbert and Bill ransom the Jesus incident . . .

    (Maybe we need a tag for covers that read like the intros to bad jokes.)

  5. Ikari Gendo Says:

    And jumpsuit Jesus said, “You are forgiven. Go forth, and hentacle no more.”

  6. Francis Boyle Says:

    It’s a pity the BBC couldn’t afford to make the Doctor Who story where the Master fights giant tentacle/blob monsters but at least the concept art was put to good use.

  7. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @B’mancer: Nuts to Jesus!

  8. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    But he was tentacle raped for our transgressions; he was crushed by a flying testicle for our iniquities; upon him was the slashfic that brought us peace, and with his jumpsuit we are healed. Isaiah 53:5

  9. JuanPaul Says:

    If the Jehovahs came to my door and handed me THIS pamphlet I would be like, “hell YES I want to learn more about your religion!”

  10. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Two out of three GSS covers recommend blob of awesomeness for your pseudo-religious gloss.

  11. Tat Wood Says:

    @Francis Boyle: Barry Letts never let budgets get in the way of his ambitions. Check out the thing the Ogrons worship in ‘Frontier in Space’ episode 6.

  12. Ray P Says:

    And stood on the shore of the sea of Galilee he said “I will make you jelly-fishes of men.”

  13. fred Says:

    ‘Le Ballon Rouge’ had a little known sequel, ‘Le Cthulhu Testicule Rouge’.

  14. THX 1138 Says:

    This was actually simply named The Incident, but the designer caught sight of the cover painting and couldn’t help his oath of shock from invading the title.

  15. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Wait, look in the mid ground at right. That’s not Jesus, that’s Hiccup and Toothless!

  16. ProfBeetle Says:

    Gollancz Books is still miffed Frank Herbert rejected their suggestion of the much punchier tittle “Jumpsuit Jesus: Alien Testical Invasion!” They were hoping to start a franchise.

    @Dead Stuff With Big Teeth: OMG, so Hickup get’s a Jesus complex later in life? Then do those floating egg sacks have something to do with dragon mating rituals? So many questions.

    (I can already tell that posting here is going to make my iPhone’s word suggestions far more interesting)

  17. JuanPaul Says:

    “Father! Give me a sign that you hear me! Anything! Any sign at all!”

  18. Anna T. Says:

    @Francis Boyle: You win the Internet. Good one.

    Anyways, I’m not sure whether that’s actually Jesus dealing with evolutionary rejects, or a scene from a very strange opera.

  19. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:


    So, you think you can stop me and spit in my eye?
    So, you think you can love me and leave me to die?
    Ooh, baby…

  20. Francis Boyle Says:

    @Anna T.

    Thanks, I needed a new Internet. The one I’ve got isn’t bad but the little red blinking light on the top doesn’t work anymore.

    @Tat Wood

    To my shame I drawing a blank on that scene. I’ll just have to imagine that illuminated bin liners were involved à la “The creature from the pit”.

  21. Tat Wood Says:

    @Francis Boyle: The ‘large, savage reptile’ isn’t nearly as dignified as Erato the Tythonian. They hired an outside contractor, usually manufacturers of inflatable life-rafts, to build it. You can see a sneak preview of it in mural from at the start of this clip but skip to 6:24 for the full horror.
    Paul Bernard, who directed most of this adventure, was reasonably happy with the result but David Malony, who made the climax of Episode 6 as part of recording ‘Planet of the Daleks’, refused to let this object into shot, which is why Roger Delgado’s last scene as the Master is such an undignified, confusing mess.

    Still, it could have been worse…

  22. Tag Wizard Says:

    @ProfBeetle – Welcome to the party. After posting here for awhile watch how your targeted Google ads start changing.

  23. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Prof, TW: call 555-orthodontic-emergency • dude • fangs • saliva • unknown artist • yuk

    You’re welcome. 😉

  24. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Is it possible that’s not Jesus, itinerant preacher, Son of God, etc. etc. but:

    The cover designer forgot some punctuation? That upon being attacked by flying tentacled testicles, poor doomed Jumpsuit Man only had time to yell one word, and thus this went down in history as The “Jesus!” Incident?

    Or was different punctuation missing, and in fact the horrific encounter took the name of the jump-suited chap of Mexican descent, The Jesús Incident?

    We will never know.

  25. Ray P Says:

    Someone flashed a piece at him on the lanes. No one fucks with the Jesus.

  26. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Sequels included The Jesus Normal and The Jesus Reflection.

  27. Francis Boyle Says:

    @Tat Wood

    Now THAT is a testicle monster and really I think the only way it could be worse is if it somehow involved Ron Jeremy. Pan’s People just doesn’t cut it.

  28. ProfBeetle Says:

    @Tag Wizard Thanks! My Google ads could use a good shakeup.

  29. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It took balls to publish that cover… and I know this for a fact ‘cos I CAN SEE ALL THREE OF THEM!

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