May 23
Click for full image
Click for full imageIt’s a Two-Fer Tuesday — Psion Pspecial!
Leah Comments: A MALE protagonist, in a skimpy top and skirt, as well as 80s hair that looks like he copied it out of a porno mag. Bonus semi-transparent floating aliens, and trees(?), also semi-transparent, growing out of pipes.
Published 1982, 1985 Thanks to Erika for sending in the other one.
(Average: 8.38 out of 10)
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May 23rd, 2017 at 11:51 am
#1: Pstupid.
#2: Psickening.
May 23rd, 2017 at 11:56 am
#2: ‘Where do you suppose chips come from?’
‘What, french fried potato chips? A chip factory, I assume.’
‘With lots of unhappy, slouched chavs slaving away for the chip boss?’
‘The chip boss fellah. Who looks like David Bowie in The Man Who Fell To Earth.’
‘Well, he’s got to drive those poor sods. He’s got a family to feed, you know.’
‘A family, aye?’
‘Yes, they live on beyond the magical potato tree forest. That’s where the potatoes come from, you know.’
‘The chip factory potatoes…another rip o’ the bong?’
‘You must’ve read my mind…’
May 23rd, 2017 at 1:11 pm
Top: “I hate this stuff, it gets all over your fingers.”
Bottom: “Psighin’: A Novel of the Blond Afro”.
May 23rd, 2017 at 1:26 pm
If it didn’t say “A Novel…” on the cover, we might mistake a book for a pack of detergent, a VHS tape, or a box of wipes… publishers know these things! It is not for us to question their wisdom.
May 23rd, 2017 at 1:37 pm
#1: Young Nikolai Tesla discovers that the shape of the magnetic field strongly resembles the female uterus and ovaries. He spends the rest of his short, tragic life seeking the G-Spot that will provide unlimited free energy to the world.
May 23rd, 2017 at 1:41 pm
Health and safetfy nightmare… fire from the mind and electricity in the hands.
May 23rd, 2017 at 1:56 pm
Founder of The Psionic Menace?
May 23rd, 2017 at 2:25 pm
@DSWBT
You see potatoes, I see penises. Well, there’s no accounting for taste I suppose.
May 23rd, 2017 at 2:30 pm
#1 Great party trick, but your power is otherwise useless. Don’t quit your day job.
May 23rd, 2017 at 2:50 pm
Has this ‘Novel of the future’ reached its expiration date? It looks a little gone by.
May 23rd, 2017 at 3:21 pm
Psi-on, you crazy diamond!
May 23rd, 2017 at 3:56 pm
@Francis: Remind me to NOT come over to your house for lunch again. 😉
@JP: I imagine Skeletor saying that to He-Man and utterly CRUSHING the poor lad’s spirit.
May 23rd, 2017 at 4:52 pm
@A.R. Yngve: they needed to tell us it’s a novel in case anyone in the market for a personal organiser purchased this by mistake. 1985 was in between the first two models.
If only Joan Vinge had copyrighted the name ‘Blackberry’…
May 23rd, 2017 at 5:43 pm
So, second cover: Kid in an ugly outfit with bad hair, being watched by a group of old lady ghosts floating in the trees. Everyone has a glowing bindi, and the forest appears to be mechanical.
Yeah, these are definitely eighties, especially with the ugly clothes.
May 23rd, 2017 at 7:35 pm
Looking at the bloke in the first cover, the term ‘palm pilot’ does spring to mind.
May 24th, 2017 at 3:50 am
@DSWBT
Well, given the HUGE THROBBING COCK on the guys chest I think I can be forgiven for thinking everything on the second cover is some sort of phallic symbol.
May 24th, 2017 at 5:07 am
@FB—a-and it’s pointing straight up at its counterpart on cover 1! I think you’ve uncovered a vast subterranean image cluster haunting the mind of the cover artist, if not that of Joan D. Vinge herself.
May 24th, 2017 at 5:31 am
So the first cover proves psychic powers give you a literally splitting headache.
#2: could be potatoes, penises, Twinkies, Minions sans overalls…
May 25th, 2017 at 5:06 am
The story itself is not actually all that bad, if a little bit bizarre, and what makes the cover I submitted even worse in my mind is that I also own the sequels, which have lovely covers.
October 29th, 2017 at 5:34 am
@Fred: Sadly, no. I think there’s a few centuries left to go before that happens. And why doesn’t this have a ‘male skirts’ tag?
January 5th, 2021 at 4:20 am
I strongly regret selecting the “Random Terrible Cover” option today.