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Feb 26

Mummies for nothing, and the box is free!Click for larger image

Tom Noir Comments: Free two-day shipping with Amazon Prime?!? I’m going to order a dozen of these things!

Published 1980

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.59 out of 10)
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21 Responses to “Why Call Them Back From Heaven?”

  1. THX 1138 Says:

    This is what happens if you keep your Christmas decorations up past 12th Night.

  2. Bibliomancer Says:

    Incoming!!!

  3. Francis Boyle Says:

    Wait, weren’t we promised flying cars? I know I was dying for one.

  4. JuanPaul Says:

    Avon calling!

  5. fred Says:

    They weren’t ‘called back’, Trump kicked them out.

  6. Lillie Awesome Says:

    Dr. Caligari sure needs a lot of cabinets.

  7. JuanPaul Says:

    Mormon headquarters dispatches another wave of missionaries.

  8. Tor Mented Says:

    Why call them back from heaven? Why not just text them?

  9. Tor Mented Says:

    Think of the roaming charges.

  10. Anna T. Says:

    Well . . . cemeteries certainly have changed in the future, haven’t they?

  11. Tat Wood Says:

    We don’t get whizz-lines on ‘proper’ illustrations so we can’t tell if these corpsicles are whooshing out from the pumice ziggurat or being aimed at it with such precision that each goes into a specific, designated hole.

    I hope I get the latter when it’s my turn.

  12. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Good to see they’ve found a new use for those old IBM mainframe punch cards.

  13. B. Chiclitz Says:

    This cover would be vastly improved with a little punctuation variation.

    1. Get rid of that stupid rhetorical question as the title.
    2. Get rid of Heinlein’s overblown praise and turn it into a dig.

    Revision suggestion:
    Why, Call Them Back from Heaven!
    Clifford D. Simak
    TO READ SCIENCE FICTION IS TO READ SIMAK?
    Robert Heinlein

  14. Bibliomancer Says:

    @B. Chiclitz – That blurb makes no sense as it is. I can understand “to read Simak is to read science fiction”. But “to read science fiction is to read Simak” means every damn sci-fi story I read is going to sound like They Walked Like Men.

  15. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Are they coming down from heaven, or flying up to the top of the ziggurat/Mormon temple? Is there some sort of multi-barreled projectile weapon flinging them up, or is the tower exploding them out?

    Is the uniformity of the glass coffins and mummy wraps indicative that only one sort of people get called up or down? And who uses glass coffins outside of Snow White’s dwarfs? Why are the coffins so long and flat; did “them” get squished in the process?

    Did Esteves miss “vanishing point day” at UAI? Did Heinlein get his phrase order mixed up, or was he deliberately talking like Yoda? WTF, Avon Books?

    These, and many other questions will not be answered tomorrow (or any other time) on “Days of Our GSS.”

  16. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Bibliomancer—Thanks for the link. Nice to see those bowling ball heads again. Reminds me of a former life . . . .

  17. Hammy Says:

    Why call them back from Heaven? Well, if they want to be actors, they’d better answer those call-backs.

  18. Tom Noir Says:

    Is this the book that The Good Place is based on?

  19. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Someday, our descendants will have to deal with the question: “Do we HAVE to thaw out all the douchebag rich guys and politicians who thought future generations wanted them back?”

  20. fred Says:

    Why? BECAUSE BARRY MANILOW IN THE U.K.. Stupid question.

  21. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @ARY: It’s fine — everyone who’s already been frozen for posterity has had all their cell walls ruptured by ice crystals (not to mention weren’t frozen within 4-5 minutes after death), so there’s no bringing them back.

    @fred: I think Barry’s probably planning to be buried like a normal person. All that will survive is his plastic surgery implants.

    (Seriously, I was flipping through channels before Xmas and he was doing a duet with his 1970s video self, and nobody’s skin is as naturally tight as it was 50 years ago. Yikes. It scared me and I kept flipping.)

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