Apr 11

It was this or the poop deckClick for larger image

Charles Comments: She thought she would be the first female leader of the pirates but she ended up a figurehead.

Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.73 out of 10)

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24 Responses to “Guardsman of Gor”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    “I wish they’d invent Twitter so I can use the #metoo tag…”

  2. JuanPaul Says:

    Even his kneecaps have muscles. Though I don’t think his right leg is attached to his body.

  3. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @JP—That hyper-muscular knee should be the tip off that what we have here is a classic case of “Steroid Shrinkage.” I mean something should be dangling from beneath that mini-kilt, no?

  4. Tat Wood Says:

    The Jesse Rae/ Sandie Shaw duet was one of the first videos banned by MTV.

  5. Bibliomancer Says:

    ARRRRRR – U kidding me?

  6. fred Says:

    He had never heard someone ask the old ‘How many guardsmen does it take to chain up a woman?’ joke until that day.

  7. JuanPaul Says:

    He’s guarding against split ends.

  8. B. Chiclitz Says:

    “You don’t fool me, Captain Guardsman. I know you said you valued my skills, experience and motivation and that you wanted me to have a real leadership position in your Navy, but really you just want a figurehead.”

  9. Tat Wood Says:

    Someone asked for his advice on how to break the ice with girls.

  10. Francis Boyle Says:

    Eww. I mean I’m up for a bit of bondage as much as anyone but that’s just dark.

  11. GSS ex-noob Says:

    I’m really worried about his torso. Between WTF is happening with his ribs, and the lack of nipples, something’s terribly wrong there. His knee is also weird, as @JP said.

    @B.Chic: Gotta be. The guys behind him ought to be getting an eyeful and they don’t seem to be.

    @THX: GSS.

    @Tat: groan

    Everything except the dude looks pretty competently done — it’s just ickier than most of what we see here, because Gor. (shudder)

  12. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Meanwhile, I wonder if this can be found in the wild, or if it’s ebook-only:

    I know it was one of his juveniles, but it wasn’t meant for pre-schoolers.

  13. fred Says:

    He either has two black eyes or is wearing eyeshadow.

  14. anon Says:

    Why are you all being so negative? He has a nice ship, it just needed bumpers on its bow.

    Anyway, colour me maroon, but I’m shipping this couple. She feels attached to say the least and no wonder, because the guy’s clearly a keeper: He isn’t afraid to tie the knot and even takes her with him on business trips.

    Surf, Go-Go and MRA / Drago Funs Margo / Ragda’s Fun Groom
    The great excursions of the boat Knee That Ho
    John Norman

    addendum: @GSS ex-noob: “Gor”, nice woody sort of word.

  15. Tor Mented Says:

    I like my women like I like my ships: ready for ramming.
    (I should probably apologize for that one.)

  16. Tor Mented Says:

    How about: broad in the beam with a magnificent prow.

  17. Raoul Says:

    It’s unlucky to have lady on board a ship. Women and seamen don’t mix.

  18. Bruce A Munro Says:

    Guardsman of Gor: When judging a book by its cover is okey dokey


    The book you don’t want to be seen reading on the bus because people will correctly interpret the cover

  19. jrdelirious Says:

    Keep going @Tor Mented! Soon you’ll finally be released from that network contract!

    …and really, I’ve been sort of expeting the news of a mob with pitchforks at John Norman’s house for a couple of decades now.

  20. drlemaster Says:

    So, if you had to choose, would you rather read a Gor book or a Dick Blade book?

  21. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @drlemaster: I’ve read both.

    Dick. Much less unpleasant.
    I’d rather puzzle through Dick in Russian than read any more Gor.

    And speaking of torture devices, my Mad Max boot is gone as my broken leg has been determined to be healed enough to be walked on properly. Huzzah. Still hurts like an SOB, though.

  22. A.R.Yngve Says:


  23. Ray P Says:

    They may take our wives but they will never take our FREEDOM!

  24. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Now, don’t take my harmless quips too seriously. It’s not as if I harbor any contempt for the people who take joy in reading Gor books, or those who think the Gor books present a viable lifestyle.

    And may I also mention that I sincerely believe Santa Claus exists as a living,, breathing embodiment of the Spirit of Christmas, that the Easter Bunny is real, and that Boris Johnson knows what he’s doing…

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