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Jun 28

Halloween party at BaenClick for larger image

FluffyGhostKitten Comments:

Old Plato saw both mind and matter.
Thomas Hobbes saw but the latter.
Now Tom’s soul doth rot in Hell.
Quoth the Lord, “It’s immaterial. Now put on the bloody tiger suit.”

Published 2021

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.67 out of 10)
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17 Responses to “Grantville Gazette IX”

  1. Francis Boyle Says:

    I will never believe Calvin is that ugly.

  2. Max Bathroom Says:

    The is the most baroque approach to grooming a child I have ever seen.

  3. fred Says:

    Is she the jailbait girl from the previous Grantville Gazette cover? Looks like her.

    https://www.goodshowsir.co.uk/?p=17558

  4. Tat Wood Says:

    It they’re trying to warp young minds by turning Calvin and Hobbes into a nightmarish discourse on political philosophy (but, you know, for kids), Channel 4 was years ahead of them: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPnDEkYA2BY
    (This really happened. Finding evidence online was hard because even when Schools Television was put on at weird hours for teachers to record, nobody kept this. And there’s another KNTV swamping search parameters with fantastically dull local news from San Jose.)

  5. A. R. Yngve Says:

    Bill Watterson (creator of Calvin & Hobbes) must never see this. It would break his heart.

  6. Tor Mented Says:

    Lamest Man-Kzin sequel so far.

  7. Bruce A Munro Says:

    I can’t help thinking Eric Flint came up with the Calvin and Hobbes joke first and then put together a whole collection of Grantville stories so he could have that cover picture.

  8. FluffyGhostKitten Says:

    @fred: Actually, no. It’s Queen Christina of Sweden. Which is arguably worse.

  9. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Not only is this WTF art, @FluffyGhostKitten has provided superb art direction. GSS!

    (I’d like Dan Ackroyd to reprise his SNL character who made fun of Bad Cinema, Bad Theatre, etc. but with GSS covers.)

    I guess all the time-traveling made them forget what Hobbes looked like, and maybe he’s ended up cosplaying Tony the Tiger instead.

    I’ve a friend auf Deutschland who haaates these books. Not only for the general bad prose, libertarianism, etc. but because they get the starting history and geography of Germany completely wrong. (Quel surprise from BAEN!!!badprose,WTFart,and’splosions) Luckily they have no distribution outside the US and maybe Canada, so my friend’s not subjected to much of it.

    @Max: excellent use of “baroque”! And these are really professional groomers — fun costumes, including a fursuit (oh ack, is that guy a furry?) and a Queen to lure the kid in. Knowing the publisher and real life, everyone on the cover is a Republican.

    @Tat: Someone thought that was a good idea to show to young children? Scarier than the test pattern girl in “Life on Mars”!

    San Jose was even more boring before it became Silicon Valley. Orchards everywhere. It’s still boring except when some techbro or internet bubble goes nuts. And they like it that way — all the big city advantages including a downtown which is pretty happening and various sportsball, a university, a mostly-restored river, a light rail, and some truly excellent museums, but no crime in the nice parts of town. There’s a park downtown you don’t want to go into after dark, though — the homeless aren’t any trouble, but dear God, the rats!

    Also, you never know when the ugly Quetzalcoatl statue might get you.
    https://www.atlasobscura.com/places/quetzalcoatl-sculpture-park-god

    @ARY: I hope his lawyers did, though.

    @Tor: GSS!

  10. Emster Says:

    @FluffyGhostKitten – GSS!
    @Tor: Also GSS!

    Is that little kid off the the right wielding a lightsaber?

    Gazette #9??? I lost interest in the series shortly after Gazette #1…

  11. Tat Wood Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: we breed our kids hardier. Nobody was ever scared by Test Card F (except Jimi Hendrix) and anyone growing up in 70s Britan saw far weirder things as a matter of course. Don’t forget, we think of ‘Doctor Who’ as a kiddy show.

    Now ‘The Singing Ringing Tree’ – that was creepy.

  12. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Doctor Who has always been a family show, even if some of the family is behind the sofa part of the time. Double entendres for the teens, scary but eventually defeated monsters for the kids, good-looking companion ladies for the dads, and decades of (non) continuity and cosplay for the nerds (Although The Scarf is still the international symbol for the Doctor. I’ve got one).

    Mind you, around here the kiddies climb around on the previously mentioned statue whilst romping in the park and they are regularly menaced when riding in cars by assholes in Teslas. I swear a bit of Musk’s personality enters into people when they buy one. Now that’s scary. (People driving electric cars by other manufacturers drive fine. It’s just Teslas that come with douchebags.)

  13. fred Says:

    @ 9) GSS ex-noob: Leonard Pinth Garnell, only with scratch-and-sniff Smell-O-Vision.

  14. Tat Wood Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: I do know that. The ‘Children’s Own Programme That Adults Adore’ stuff, not whether Musk is the real-life Tobias Vaughn or Davros…

    My point is, there was no problem with allowing five year olds to have their hatchling-chick exposure to the series and, traditionally, it was on at around 5.30pm on Saturdays. after a puppet and before an American import such as ‘The Monkees’ or ‘The Pink Panther Show’. It wasn’t in a dorks-only timeslot on an obscure channel. And it sat in a context a lot weirder than the KNTV clip…

  15. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Tat: I suppose when you haven’t got an empire any more, the kids need to be toughened up some other way than going out to the colonies.

    Reruns of the Doctor were on at 5PM on weekdays when I first saw them (right after Star Trek), with a whole arc on Sunday morning beginning at 10AM. Which is an excellent time for the kiddies to watch, and rather less good for us grownups watching after we’d had a big party and everyone had crashed various places in the host’s house. But get up we did. People would be lying around in exhaustion from staying up late (and some hung over), but the minute the TV started the “woo woo….” theme, everyone moved.

    @fred: Yes, that was his name! I can hear him saying “Truuuly wretched” about many of these covers.

    (A friend was in Europe in the late 80s and was in a tour group to an old mill. The North Americans and Western Europeans all simultaneously started doing Pinth-Garnell imitations about the people who must have worked it, a la one of the P-G segments involving that.)

  16. Lars of Mars Says:

    Last time the jail bait Grantville Gazzette appeared to me as a ‘random terrible cover’, it’s ‘random terrible cover’ was The Waters of Centaurus, a cover which illustrates a woman showing more skin, still ‘wtf’ but nowhere near as creepy.
    At least The Waters of Centaurus woman looks like she’s “well into her majority” as Howard the Duck once stated it.

  17. Lars of Mars Says:

    Once upon a time Channel 11 here in the Chicago area ran Doctor Who on weekday afternoons. Then they switched it to 11:00 Sunday night, often delayed by interminable pledge breaks (while they continually claimed that they supported science fiction and Doctor Who…) Even in my early twenties that made it rough getting up for work on Monday.
    At least Blakes 7 was on Saturday nights so we could sleep late on Sunday morning.

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