Apr 18

My eyes are up here dammit!

Emster comments: The Assassin’s Guild barred Moira from the meeting for not dressing in a conservative tunic. However, this WAS her conservative tunic.

Published 2009

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 3.70 out of 10)

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13 Responses to “The God Stalker Chronicles”

  1. A. R. Yngve Says:

    Only in Generic Fantasy do women suffer from a very specific variety of frostbite: pectus congelationis.

  2. fred Says:

    If BAEN has any brains at all, the stalking of Priapus chapter will be profusely illustrated.

  3. Tat Wood Says:

    This artist has never tried to get bloodstains out of velvet or chiffon. And the author’s agent might have thought about getting whoever wrote this to pick a byline less like a policeman in an Agatha Christie.

  4. The Blue Are Coming Says:

    She’s going to have trouble stalking anyone with headlights like those.

  5. Ryan Says:

    Why is there a portcullis in a window or door that high off the ground?

  6. JuanPaul Says:

    I wonder which god she’s stalking. Whoever it is should get a restraining order.

  7. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Not only that, but her thumbs are, uh, extra large as well.

  8. Max Bathroom Says:

    @B. Chiclitz
    She has thumbs? I’d not noticed…

  9. The Blue Are Coming Says:

    @Ryan – and why also was it built to remain in a fixed, half-open position?

    To keep out taller dragons, maybe?

    (I had to look up “portcullis”)

  10. GSS ex-noob Says:

    I don’t know about the rest of you girls, but if I was out stalking gods and crawling around on dragon gargoyle architecture (which is inexplicable vis a vis portcullis), I am darn well covering myself in clothing of less bagginess and wearing a really good bra, maybe a nice sports bra? Those devil’s dumplings* swinging around loose like that are definitely going to throw off her trajectory when jumping to/from footholds, and be a good target if she gets in a knife fight. And in full moonlight, they’re not going to be at all stealthy.

    But we expect no less from BAEN!!!whateversoundthosemelonsmake

    @BC: It’s like thumbs/fingers in AI art!

    *Missing tag, along with “cleavage”.

  11. fred Says:

    Tv tropes – bifauxnen. BAEN knows what sells.

  12. Tor Mented Says:

    I am not sure whether the hand at the end of her left sleeve is her hand. It might be part of the gargoyle sculpture she is crouching on and she is merely resting her left stump on it.

  13. Bruce A Munro Says:

    Because when I think of Jame the first word that comes to mind is “boobs.”

    Perhaps they keep the molten-lead-to-pour-through-the-gargoyle’s-throat equipment behind that portcullis so people don’t steal it. (I don’t know if she opened it coming out or someone messed up).

    @fred: it’s actually decreasing my desire to buy, although I have in fact read and enjoyed “God Stalk.” But maybe they’re aiming for a younger (and hornier) audience.

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