Sep 01

:-0Click for full image

GK Comments: …
Published 1985

Can’t stop… staring…
Many thanks to GK!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.91 out of 10)

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40 Responses to “Tik-Tok”

  1. SI Says:

    Is that robots gun connected to his ass?

    No wonder he looks … shocked …

  2. cutmanmike Says:


    This is awesome

  3. Little Mi Says:

    I would not be even a bit ashamed to be seen with this book cover, in fact I would hold it aloft with pride!

    It’s amazing, and I want it!

  4. Herm Says:

    That is not at all how I imagine the pleasant little clockwork man from Oz. Come to think of it, that’s not how I imagined L Frank Baum’s name was spelled, either.

  5. SophaLoaf Says:

    This scares me. It reminds me of when as a kid I cut open a Teddy Ruxpin and he kept on talking.

  6. Chike Says:

    Noooooooooooooo! I have fond memories of this one. Bought it in a used bookstore one summer when I was a kid.

    Yes, okay, it’s goofy … but damn, nostalgia is a powerful force.

    If I ever come across this volume with this cover in a store, I wouldn’t hesitate to buy it.

  7. CSA Says:

    I don’t think its a gun he’s holding.

    Insane Pleasure Robot: Time for your oil enema.
    Broken Robot: Let me die.
    Insane Pleasure Robot: 404, conscience not found.
    Broken Robot: Nooooooooo!

  8. SI Says:

    @Chike – Haha I would completely buy this too. It’s amazing.

    Another question, why is there so much steam?

  9. Some Kei$abot Says:

    Wake up in the mornin’ feelin’ like the Tin Man

    (something someting something) gonna hit these clone vats!

    Before I leave brush mah teeth wit’ a can fulla oil

    Cause when I… I got nothin’

  10. NGpm Says:

    I just can’t stop laughing … the face pasted on a canned ham stuck on a robot body is too much. It’s like Spam meets (meats?) Metropolis.

  11. anon Says:

    Okay. What is that thing spilling out under the robot’s metal leotard?

    I bet the artists are just trying fit as many poorly disguised jokes as possible on these things.
    I mean, come on! The poop gun, the umbilical cord, the sex doll face, that leotard spillage… WTF?

  12. jimmay Says:

    I love how he has the mouth of an inflatable sex doll.

  13. Anrkist Says:

    Isn’t that the robot from Return to Oz?

  14. Tommi Says:

    Turn on the fog machine …

  15. Herm Says:

    Anrkist: Yes, from what I gleaned from Wikipedia this is one of those terribly mature “turn cuddly childhood character into rapin’ murderin’ bastard for no good reason” books. I may be being overly harsh – I haven’t read it.

  16. Nix Says:

    Herm: indeed not. Tik-Tok is a humaniform robot servant turned insane mass-murderer turned politician: the book as a whole is a hilarious dissection of the Asimovian robot schtick (it’s slavery, guys) combined with, well, hell, it’s *Sladek*. This is the guy who took the Eiffel Tower into orbit (in _The Reproductive System_). It’s zany and dark. So the cover is quite appropriate, really, even if not remotely a depiction of any of the scenes in the book.

  17. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Arnold Schwarzenegger IS… THE SCREAMINATOR.”

  18. chuffy Says:

    That’s a severe case of robo-cameltoe there.

  19. Jerk of all Trades Says:

    I don’t think it’s counted as cameltoe when it’s escaped.

  20. Tom Noir Says:

    Man, I hate stations that aren’t self-service.

  21. Rags Says:

    Insane Pleasure Robot sentences you to DEATH…(short pause for dramatic effect)……by snu snu!!

    Broken Robot: Nooooooooooo……..i mean whoo hoo!!!

  22. Anna T. Says:

    When a cover reminds me of a Salvador Dali painting, then it ought to be tagged “WTF”. The fact that this isn’t troubles me.

  23. anon Says:

    Dank Joshel
    Chic 1984 fiction I — Breasts and wiener for the win

  24. Bibliomancer Says:

    Repent! Harlan owns the Ticktockman.
    Expect to hear from his lawyers if you haven’t already.

  25. JuanPaul Says:

    “I just shot friend unit, T4756389B!? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

  26. Ray P Says:

    The satellite dish ran away with the spoon-faced robot.

  27. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @anon (11)—I think you had it right way back when there. And we all know it’s hard to put on a put on, except maybe to say that robot ought to put on a toga or something, really!

    And if you want to see how this could play out in “real life,” please listen to this song about Joe and the Sy Borg.

  28. fred Says:

    The only thing wrong with this cover is that the Cybermen/Daleks should be inside Stonehenge and emerge in the middle of a hippie fest and then are attacked by naked Cat People who are painted like Picts.

  29. Francis Boyle Says:

    Needs more chrome. Especially on the gun.

    Also, that’s not where the groinal attachment goes.

    Also, also I vote that the BBC makes fred Doctor Who showrunner when Moffat goes.

  30. THX 1138 Says:

    I only asked if it spoke Bocce!

  31. Anna T. Says:

    @fred: That sounds interesting, but if they did there’d probably be mass panic, what with the alien invasion and all. And the cat people would probably lose badly.

  32. JuanPaul Says:

    @THX1138 A protocol droid he ain’t.

  33. JuanPaul Says:

    “Does this suit make my balls look huge?”

  34. Bibliomancer Says:

    The German translation is titled “Ticktack” and its cover looks like a completely different novel.

  35. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    So I says to myself, I says, ‘I’m stuck looking at an atrocious shit show cover every single time I look at GSS this weekend.’

    Then I says, ‘At least I’m not at the Fyre Festival.’


  36. GSS ex-noob Says:

    The only thing this cover is good for is adolescent snickers at the robo-anatomy, and the suggestion that fred run Doctor Who.

  37. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @B’mancer: go BUTCH!

  38. A. R. Yngve Says:

    An appropriate depiction of the novel TIK-TOK… and TikTok.

  39. Hammy Says:

    Okay, why does the gun-wielding robot have a face like a parking meter?

    And why do all the robots (I’m assuming that’s what they are) in the keyholes in the background have “dad bods”? Would that make them dad-bots?

  40. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Hammy: Think of how many dad jokes could be stored in those positronic brains.

    And shudder.

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