Mar 06
Rusty Comments: How one can tell a true hero from a common man is by whether his shirt disintegrates in an alluring yet ferocious manner at the drop of the hat.
Published 2011
Rusty Comments: How one can tell a true hero from a common man is by whether his shirt disintegrates in an alluring yet ferocious manner at the drop of the hat.
Published 2011
March 6th, 2012 at 9:35 am
Not sure if he’s a singer or a sword swallower from that pose.
The only part of that cover that might, just might, lead me to take a look inside the covers is the claim that this is by a Nebula-winning author. Everything else about it says “run for your lives!”
(I note, however, that it doesn’t say “Nebula award-winning BOOK”.)
March 6th, 2012 at 11:44 am
He’s really having a good look at that microphone before he uses it, isn’t he?
March 6th, 2012 at 11:51 am
I don’t know. It puts a smile on my face. It’s ever so Baroque, bright lights and silly star fonts. And I can’t help imagining the soloist bouncing up and down on his stage like it’s a huge springboard, and then flying PHWOOM! off into low orbit.
March 6th, 2012 at 12:26 pm
Words fail me. Seriously. There’s so much of everything, and so much brilliance in everything, that I don’t know where to start. There’s not even a single thing that would make this better. Good show.
March 6th, 2012 at 1:41 pm
He looks like he’s just been punched in the kidneys.
I have a companion to that book I’ve been considering sending in, and now I think I had better.
March 6th, 2012 at 2:40 pm
The Skolian Empire — home of the brave, land of the inadequately shirted!
March 6th, 2012 at 2:42 pm
Wait, wait… does the cover state that this is an IMAGE of a Nebula Award-winning author?? Who???
March 6th, 2012 at 4:04 pm
I know that’s probably supposed to be part of his shredded shirt. And yet, for the sake of another rich layer of the ridiculous, I really want to believe that he’s actually wearing a lime green thong.
March 6th, 2012 at 5:56 pm
God, looks like a bad still from an 80s film….
March 6th, 2012 at 6:03 pm
A hand-mic with a built in tripod. Why?
March 6th, 2012 at 7:01 pm
All it needs is a Ting! on the microphone, or maybe on his smile.
March 6th, 2012 at 8:34 pm
Hey, what gives? Here’s another version of the same cover which has subtly different views of the face close-ups and microphone poses:
http://en.risingshadow.net/library?action=book&book_id=32632
It been sort-of airbrushed, as if the rockstar excesses of the original are too raunchy.
March 6th, 2012 at 9:05 pm
@Phil: Interesting!
There’s a bigger image of that cover here:
http://library.risingshadow.net/images/books/32632.jpg
I’m not sure, but I think the cover you found is a mock-up. It has a more sketchy look, less polished, a little more collaged, the way computer-generated preliminary sketches can be. Also it’s cover art, not a physical cover — perfect, perfectly rectangle, no sense of paper or fingerprints, and there’s no sign of blurb or price or any of the other little extras that say final cover. Another clue is that its composition is nearly identical to this one, but there are some important differences. The scars on the back are rather more jarring, and, well, I can understand why they turned the figure’s faces towards us in the “final” art. The one here that Rusty submitted may have a bit of a “Dagwood about to eat a big sandwich” vibe, but in the other version from risingshadow, all three faces are turned away from the viewer, lacking in emotional connection, blank, even.
March 6th, 2012 at 9:11 pm
^^Whoa! That made me go back and take a closer look at the face. That’s no rock concert. That’s a rowdy Scientology convention led by none other than Mr. Tom Cruise!
March 6th, 2012 at 10:34 pm
“And… AHHHHHHHHH! My back just locked! Medic! MEDIC!”
@THX 1138 – isn’t he!! He’s got an, “ewww… look at the dirt in there” face on! 🙂
March 7th, 2012 at 12:01 am
I think that microphone is actually trying to attack him due to his terrible taste in leotards and he’s desperately trying to stop it going for his throat.
March 7th, 2012 at 7:27 am
Human all-body sign-language: position #72: THE SWASTIKA.
March 7th, 2012 at 9:48 am
Well thank you Adam! Now that I’ve been laughing for 30 minutes, I can finally start my day! Hilarious! Good Show!
March 7th, 2012 at 10:54 am
The Skolian Empire’s Got Talent just wasn’t the same after Simon Cowell left.
March 7th, 2012 at 3:07 pm
LOL 😀
March 8th, 2012 at 9:43 am
“Aaand III-III WWILLL AALWWWAYS LLLLOVE YO-OOO-OOO-UUU…”
(Too Soon?)
March 12th, 2012 at 7:28 pm
What a shitty name for a band!
March 23rd, 2012 at 5:54 pm
I have no interesting comments, so I’ll just say: He’s ugly, and probably smells.
March 24th, 2012 at 4:26 pm
But why this microphone has three legs?
March 26th, 2012 at 7:32 pm
I think, in case he wants to put it down on to a table.
March 26th, 2012 at 7:34 pm
What song do you all think would fit the scene most?
My personal choice is Private Dancer by Tina Turner.
March 27th, 2012 at 4:12 pm
@Anti-Sceptic: He’s obviously going for the full Whitney.
March 27th, 2012 at 8:47 pm
That poor fellow looks like he’s thrown out his back something fierce.
April 21st, 2012 at 8:42 pm
There’s a very “good” reason why his shirt is shredded and he’s in an improbable pose: this author has branched out into romance! (Yes, it’s true.) These books are apparently considered romantic fantasy/futuristic romance — hence the breakaway shirt. Ms. Asaro was one of the writers on a panel of romance authors that came to town recently. She spent a lot of time talking about how she was considered this GREAT sci-fi writer, but then the readers/publishers were just SO blown away by the romance in her stories that they felt that she should push into that genre as well. Personally, I think they were just trying to pawn her off onto someone else. Gee, thanks, sci-fi people. Like we don’t already have ENOUGH bad romance novel covers! On the other hand, this book cover isn’t NEARLY as horrible as “Ascendant Sun” which has one of the most deformed torsos I’ve seen this side of Fabio.
–The Wife
April 23rd, 2012 at 11:12 am
Yep. Oh boy… http://images.amazon.com/images/P/0312868243.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg
July 10th, 2014 at 2:06 pm
Safety with light sabers. Don’t do what Donny Don’t does.
October 15th, 2015 at 2:29 pm
@Rev: “I think I see the problem..”
March 10th, 2017 at 2:33 pm
And here’s the movie version https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LktlUrTTiNw
March 10th, 2017 at 4:18 pm
The big screen on the left looks like he’s taking a shower. The big screen on the right looks like he’s shining a flashlight into his mouth.
March 10th, 2017 at 4:31 pm
She misspelled ‘Carnalians’.
March 11th, 2017 at 2:36 am
perhaps this is a warm-up event to the next one: sword swallowing
March 11th, 2017 at 3:37 am
Carne Asaro my favorite Mexican dish!
March 11th, 2017 at 3:39 am
@Bibliomancer—and in the middle he looks like he’s trying to stab that planet.
March 11th, 2017 at 6:42 am
I’ve been saving this one all week.
Someone, please find this out in the wild.
https://www.amazon.com/Double-Star-Robert-Heinlein-ebook/dp/B016TSE6OW/
The Blue Man Group-esque stylings! The random stock art background! The incredibly equivocal blurb!
March 14th, 2017 at 2:08 pm
This always happens: Fame gets to a guy’s head, and he suddenly thinks he should be a pop star.
John Oliver, let this cover be a warning. You are NOT pop star material.
March 16th, 2017 at 2:15 am
I
I will be Wizard
And you
You will be admin
Though nothing will need a space sheep
We can eat gyros, just for one day
We can eat lamb, just for one day…
Ah, David, you left this planet & went home too soon…