Jul 02

Don't want to crop this picture... love the potted plant!Click for full image

Alexandria and kinda John Comment: My friend and I love your site. So many fun times.
Published 2013

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.90 out of 10)

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23 Responses to “Amish Vampires in Space”

  1. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Oh ja, Mary Lou, you look very plain covered in blood!”

  2. THX 1138 Says:

    Geez, these box ticking exercises just get more ridiculous. Good luck powering your spaceship with no electricity.

  3. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Amish spaceships are powered by chucking hay out of the exhaust ports!

  4. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    The fellow in back was drained of all of his colours but green…so, I rather think the potted plant is safe.

    Good reviews on GoodReads. I know what my wife is getting for her birthday this year!

  5. Tat Wood Says:

    To be fair, Amish vampires anywhere else would be silly.

  6. Bibliomancer Says:

    The Transylvania Dutch

  7. Tom Noir Says:

    This cover is missing out on some excellent tagline opportunities:

    “Barn to be wild.”
    “The end comes not with a bang but with a wimple.”
    “She’s got more than just a bee in her bonnet.”

  8. fred Says:

    What does John Book have to say about this.

  9. infoqueen Says:

    “In space, no one can hear you Rumspringa.”

  10. Becky Minor Says:

    I just have to play devil’s advocate here: perhaps the premise of the book is crazy, but does that make the cover art bad? In terms of artistic execution, what would you tell Kirk DuPounce he should have done differently on this in terms of illustration or typography?

    This book has landed on a couple “worst cover” sites, and I really just think people are having a visceral reaction to the premise, not the actual quality of the illustration. Just sayin’

    Otherwise, some real gems here, good for a tear-inducing laugh.

  11. J. Hooligan Says:

    As someone who has actually read this book (see review –, I will admit that I was drawn to it because the cover and title are hilarious. Nobody can deny that… But I ended up getting the book because it actually looked interesting. I was pleasantly surprised at how much I ended up liking it.

  12. Tat Wood Says:

    The cover is trying to make us think ‘Buffy’ but I’m thinking ‘Rosie Dixon, Night Nurse’. Which is showing my age somewhat.

  13. imladrisnine Says:

    I’m a bit baffled… what exactly is wrong with the cover? Have you seen some of the sci-fi covers out there? I think there’s an issue here separating the books *concept* from the artist/typography. Though I guess press is press, right?

  14. Jim Says:

    The cover depicts the book’s story.

    Its a “what if” sort of book, which all good sci fi does.

    What if the Amish persist hundreds of years into the future to a time when cultural colonies are being set up?

    What if they go along but something then goes terribly wrong?

    The title was meant to be a bit if a joke, but the story is not.

    Have an open mind and give it a try.

  15. Alessandra Kelley Says:

    Bibliomancer wins.

  16. Book Wench Says:

    For generations the people of Pawsatucky were puzzled by waking in the morning to find crop circles and fully erected barns appearing mysteriously in their fields…

  17. TimP Says:

    Apparently it actually originally started with an Christian Sci-Fi Editor making a joke cover for “Amish Vampires in Space 3: Vein Pursuit” about the popularity of Vampire and Amish fiction (at least in the Christian community), then one of the authors he worked with actually went and wrote it. See for the author’s description of the process. (Includes the epically bad mock-cover for Vein Pursuit)

  18. Rags Says:

    Are all Amish hot green eyed blondes or just he vampire ones?

  19. HappyBookwyrm Says:

    I guess those commenters have a point that it’s not so much the cover art as the premise that makes one do a double take and stare. It seems to be the ultimate in “write a story with a dartboard of topics.” Thanks for the true backstory, TimP.

    Can it be topped? Maybe not.

  20. Stevie T Says:

    I suppose you can’t fault this for truth-in-advertising. And, really, what else would you put on the cover? Another unfortunately-suggestive-shaped spaceship? Would a space-age Amish even travel in such a spaceship?

  21. anon Says:

    @A.R.Yngve Not hay, horseshit.

  22. Tom Noir Says:

    “Actually, I’m a Mennonite vampire.”

  23. Anna T. Says:

    I realize some of the commenters have stated that in this book is apparently better than it sounds, but I still find the title hilarious. It looks like it leapt straight out of a ’50s pulp.

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