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Jan 19

Would you risk getting your boots wet for family?Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: It’s turtles all the way down!
Published 2014

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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33 Responses to “A Play of Shadow”

  1. Tom Noir Says:

    Do they know there’s a bridge??

  2. Tat Wood Says:

    How’s she doing that with her right knee? And how long are her arms?

  3. SI Says:

    That turtle is completely, “DUDE! Are you f’ing serious?”

  4. Tat Wood Says:

    If you’re going to re-enact that episode of ‘Bagpuss’, make sure the turtles are swimming in the same direction.

  5. Bibliomancer Says:

    “A lifetime of manspreading has trained me to execute this maneuver.”

  6. THX 1138 Says:

    “Just feed them pizza and you too can do THIS!”

  7. B. Chiclitz Says:

    He: Come this way!
    She: No, no, come this way!
    He: I tell you step out here!
    She: Idiot, I’m the one who’s on dry ground!
    Turtle: This is why their species has such a short shelf life compared to ours.

  8. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Do you see the small group of onlookers on the bridge, underneath “Julie”?
    What do they think they’re saying?

    “HEY!! Over here! Use the BRIDGE!!”
    “He’s gonna fall, he’s gonna fall…”
    “What a moron!”

  9. A.R.Yngve Says:

    The tagline at the bottom really ups the tension, doesn’t it?
    “What would you risk for family? Would you risk… GETTING YOUR NEW BOOTS WET??”

  10. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Tom, AR, Tag Wizard: the bridge is BEHIND YOU!

    And though there isn’t much shadow, there seems to be a bit of glow on the right hand side.

  11. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Collars are hard to draw. The lady looks like she’s from the Ndebele.

  12. Tag Wizard Says:

    @DSWBT – In some sense, everything is BEHIND YOU!

    @A.R.Yngve – Great minds think alike (see alt-text)

  13. Anna T. Says:

    “I learned how to ride sea turtles from Jack Sparrow.”
    “That’s CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow, idiot! And no, you didn’t! He never rode sea turtles. He was lying! Also, do you know what’s wrong with my neck?”

  14. Anna T. Says:

    @Tag Wizard: Could we have an “anatomy problems” tag (or whatever it’s actually called), please?

  15. anon Says:

    @Tat Wood: Nevermind that. Her spine must be sticking out an inch or two.

  16. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Anna T., anon—I think it’s because her boots are glued to the ground.

  17. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @TagWiz—this would be another candidate for a “Pretentious Title” tag, what with the singular “shadow” and all. If it said “A Play of Shadows” that would be merely banal, but not pretentious.

    What are we supposed to think, that maybe it’s really a Noh shadow play? That there are words missing and it should be something like, “A Play of Shadow and the Turtles”? That there’s a playwright named “Shadow” and this is his or her play?

    I once knew a guy named “The Shadow” but he wasn’t a playwright.

  18. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @BC: ‘A Play of Shadow and the Turtles’…

    A country road. A tree.
    Evening.
    Leonardo, sitting on a low mound, is trying to take off his boot. He pulls at it with both hands, panting.
    He gives up, exhausted, rests, tries again.
    As before.
    Enter Donatello.

    LEONARDO:
    (giving up again). So happy together.
    DONATELLO:
    (advancing with short, stiff strides, legs wide apart). I can’t see me lovin’ nobody but you, Donatello, for all of my life. (He broods, musing on the struggle. Turning to Leonardo.) When you’re with me, Leonardo, the skies will be blue.
    LEONARDO:
    Will they?
    DONATELLO:
    For all of my life.

  19. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @DSWBT—
    ba-ba-ba-baaa
    ba-ba-ba-baaa
    ba-ba-ba-baaa
    ba-ba-ba-baaa 😉

  20. JaunPaul Says:

    I don’t blame them for avoiding the bridge. That is not how you build an arch with stone.

  21. anon Says:

    “Here, catch this glowing orb.”

    What would you like to risk for family today?

  22. Ray P Says:

    It worked for Roger Moore in Live and Let Die.

  23. fred Says:

    Pretty much what I have imagined Klingon opera looks like.

  24. Tag Wizard Says:

    @B. Chiclitz – I hesitate to add that “pretentious title” tag because I will then open myself up to editing a thousand old posts.

  25. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Now, you could write everything I know about ladies’ period-appropriate costume on the head of a pin and still have enough room for the Lord’s Prayer.

    But.

    That isn’t even a proper dress, and it’s worn over loose trousers, and yet it’s got a corset or some such. How does that make sense? Is that ‘fetish gear for idiots’ or something? Is there a ‘big-dumb-stupid-moron’ subculture I’m not aware of?

  26. RachelJ Says:

    @Deadstuff. Well, I noticed the dress *before* the turtles, but I thought that was just me being, you know, girly. It’s like she’s wearing one kind of outfit from the waist up and another from the waist down.

  27. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @RachelJ: If you look carefully from the waist, it’s turtles all the way down. 😉

  28. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @TagWiz—understood. Not lobbying, just saying. If I were lobbying, I might lobby for a “big-dumb-stupid-moron subculture” tag, but that wouldn’t alleviate the problem, would it?

    Although I suppose you could try to hoodwink admin into accepting Chinese GSS-level wages for some weekend work.

  29. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “What would you risk for family?”
    Would you…
    – Walk on turtles over water less than one foot deep?
    – Hold a handicapped lady with a corset fetish by the hand?
    – Be jeered by people standing on a bridge nearby?

    God, all these challenges! I’m just not prepared for so much danger. Lemme think this over.

  30. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @AR: what would you risk for MY family? And, what if I were one of the people on the bridge?

  31. DaveM Says:

    After more close observation of this cover than is medically advisable, I have decided they were both practising for “dancing withe ye stars”, when the turtles got bored and decided to exit stage left.. Also, the girl is seems very unconcerned that her left leg appears to be broken, that’s true dedication!

  32. Gobbledydorp Says:

    Not to mention the creepy old buddha in the corner (whom I’m assuming is the renaissance equivalent of tolltag) getting off at the sight of the exposed corseted slinky doll and the turtle-walking man muffin. He’s quite chuffed to find that he’s insatiably aroused by their defiance of his toll, and is meditating his course of action if they successfully circumvent his bridge and steal one of his glowing orbs.

  33. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Tomonobu Itagaki’s Frogger.

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