Jun 17
Click for full imageTom Noir Comments: “Don’t use your fearsome claws and thick, scaly hide for protection, dragon! Use this unwieldy sword and shield instead! And for God’s sakes, wear a loincloth, we’re civilized here.”
Published 1998 (maybe)
(Average: 7.90 out of 10)
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June 17th, 2015 at 10:38 am
Sequel to A Bicycle for a Fish?
June 17th, 2015 at 10:58 am
You sure it’s not “dragoon”?
June 17th, 2015 at 11:04 am
The harlequin man isn’t entirely happy with his cape being used as a loin cloth.
June 17th, 2015 at 11:21 am
Sequel to An Opposable Thumb for a Dragon
June 17th, 2015 at 12:22 pm
There’s this think you have, Mr. Artist, called a spinal column, and it runs down your back and connects to that tiny little thing behind your eyeballs called your brain. Now, you can see where Sir Cant-put-on-his-helmet has a back, and you can see where he has an occipital region. But–and I cannot stress this enough!–they are not connected in any way, shape or form. Your dragon’s head is just floating on top of its torso, and it looks very, very stupid.
June 17th, 2015 at 1:48 pm
If this whole dragons-in-loincloths thing feels oddly familiar, well, it may be because it’s something of a specialty for the author.
June 17th, 2015 at 2:02 pm
@THX 1138:
“A Unicycle for a Unicorn”?
Also:
“A Mace for a Manticore”
“A Cutlass for a Chimaera”
“A Glaive for a Griffin”
“A Halberd for a Hydra”
“A Battle Axe for a Basilisk”
“A …” Ah, screw it…
June 17th, 2015 at 2:48 pm
@THX, Jeff: A Rock for a Roc?
June 17th, 2015 at 3:19 pm
If I had a real dragon I don’t think I would even consider that trade. Whatever that is on this cover ain’t a dragon, it’s more like a Roc dino people person version of Ye Olde Baen Cat People Person.
June 17th, 2015 at 6:08 pm
OK, I’ll bite:
A Dagger For a Dinosaur
A Bazooka For a Baboon
A Shank For a Shark
A Hammer For a Hummingbird
June 17th, 2015 at 6:10 pm
“HI! How are ya?”
Cheerful dragon, that…
June 17th, 2015 at 7:57 pm
That mouth looks awfully familiar…maybe he turns into an ordinary dragon when anyone is watching him?
June 17th, 2015 at 9:16 pm
I worry where this trend is going… if Generic Fantasy is “turning out” dragons to do just about anything but dragon business, what extremes will we see soon?
A spellbinding fantasy of dragon lawyers
A SUBPOENA FOR A DRAGON
A spellbinding fantasy of dragon chefs
A MEAL FIT FOR A DRAGON
A spellbinding fantasy of dragons gone bad
THE DRAGONS OF THE RED LIGHT DISTRICT
(With cold dread I anticipate the complaints from hordes of fanfic writers that I’m trying to “steal their ideas”….)
June 18th, 2015 at 1:28 am
@Tom Noir. That’s nothing. Google the author and you’ll find he’s cornered the market (such as it is) for books about loin-cloth-wearing, sword-wielding therapod dinosaurs posing as dragons.
June 18th, 2015 at 9:43 am
Behind you!
June 18th, 2015 at 11:14 am
@RachelJ
I did google it. Apparently the humanoid dragon is the main protagonist of the series. Also, apparently, he goes under the name “Bazil Broketail”.
I may have lost what little faith I had left in humanity (and dragonkind).
June 18th, 2015 at 3:39 pm
‘Bazil Broketail”, eh? So the human sidekick must be either Mr Derek or Mr Rodney.
Boom Boom!
June 18th, 2015 at 10:39 pm
You know something? This cover deserves the “WTF” tag.
Also, I suspect this book is absolutely terrible.
June 19th, 2015 at 1:15 am
Looks like Mr human and Mr lizard thing are practising for a mediaeval music hall act.
(singing) “Me and my shadow…”
Human: ‘No no lizard, lead with your Left foot, Left! Honestly, we’ll never get the choreography down in time..”
June 19th, 2015 at 2:38 am
“Christopher, trust me. This new cover artist will have the books flying off the shelves. It will be bigger than Potter! Also I have a bridge you should invest in…”
June 22nd, 2015 at 11:51 am
@DaveM: oh, yes! I think they’ll play the B-team in the Wall Around a Star musical. And what everyone learns at the end of the story is that the real magic is in being loved and helping others! 🙂
July 12th, 2024 at 4:06 am
I’m not _fundamentally_ opposed to the notion of a dragon wearing armor and using a bigass sword. But if they can’t fly or breathe fire, I’m outta here.