May 27

Snack time!Click for larger image

Ryan Comments: Between the blurb which might or might not lead into the title and the indistinct if menacing illustration, this one really scores all the points. Also, the people in that crowd need to move, or the Chinese New Year Dragon Parade is going to run them down.

Published 1965

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.42 out of 10)

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15 Responses to “Beyond the Black Enigma”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    If that’s him up there in the sky, Commander Craig avoids a hideous death as he attempts to flee the world by rocketing.

  2. fred Says:

    The back cover is synopsis heaven.

  3. Bruce A Munro Says:

    I guess the little naked people are those lucky enough to be Eaten First.

  4. Tat Wood Says:

    That blurb (thanks Fred), with its mention of ‘beautiful Elva Marlowe’, Craig’s ‘many women’ and ‘three incredible protective inventions’, suggests that his fiendish plan to save Earth is to shag the monster to death. (Or, as the front cover euphemistically puts it, ‘rocketing’.)

    Properly lubricated, of course.

  5. Francis Boyle Says:

    Maybe this is the satanic ritual we were falsely promised yesterday, but instead of a slavering goat, the Prince of Darkness has manifested in the form of a slightly bored frog/spider thing. And everyone is just wondering whether that means it’s time to start the orgy.

  6. B. Chiclitz Says:

    The little guy with outstretched arms seems to be giving a speech to the crowd.

    “And so friends, I implore you, is it not our civic duty to rid ourselves of this plague of so-called ‘enigmas’ that threaten the peace and tranquility of . . . what? what’s that you’re saying? ‘behind you?’ what do you mean ‘behind you’? I’m for looking forward, not behi—nyaah-aah-aah!”

  7. Tangulo Says:

    Methinks we have a bait-and-switch going on here by what’s in that blurb. The cover promises a pointy-toothed giant spider, but in the text it’s probably nothing. A black hole or something. BO-RING!

  8. Max Bathroom Says:

    @fred and @Tat
    Maybe the time has come for a website that concentrates on books with dreadful blurbs rather than bad cover art?

  9. fred Says:

    Bret Somers is Gardner Fox, DC comics writing legend.

  10. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @THX 1139:
    Commander Craig: “Nope. Nope. NOPE!”

    @fred@2: so the spider/dragon/frog is just a big, hairy metaphor?

  11. Tor Mented Says:

    I washed out of the Alert Command and even the Preoccupied Command before winding up in the Soporific Command.

  12. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Titled “Beyond the Black Enigma”, has only orange and some pink on front cover. An enigma indeed.

    @fred: Blurbissimo!

  13. JuanPaul Says:

    I think that’s the face I make when they don’t have Ben & Jerry’s Triple Caramel Chunk.

  14. A. R. Yngve Says:

    The Kanye West Story

  15. Emster Says:

    It’s so awful it’s fantastic. I’d nab a copy no matter how bad the story is.

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