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Aug 04

A bloody good timeClick for larger image

Max Bathroom Comments: Even the tree looks embarrassed…

Published 1991

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.58 out of 10)
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20 Responses to “The Blood of Roses”

  1. fred Says:

    James and the erotic peach.

  2. Francis Boyle Says:

    Subtle, dude, subtle.

  3. Tor Mented Says:

    Must be a pussy willow.

  4. JuanPaul Says:

    It could also be a well trimmed spruce cooch

  5. Leak Says:

    I don’t think that’s what they meant with “Thinking with Portals”, but here we are…

  6. GSS ex-noob Says:

    That, uh, is certainly a fantasy book cover. Like @FB said, it’s so very subtle.

    I’ve heard of “the walls have ears”, but not “the tree has feline eyeballs and a topless snake-woman”.

    If the roses (plural) have blood, as the title clearly says, why is there only one rose, and why is it being bled upon instead of bleeding itself?

  7. Ryan Says:

    Is the tree inside or outside?

    Or possibly should the question be, “Are those trees somehow growing gothic arches?”

  8. B. Chiclitz Says:

    If you hit your friends in the face with this book you could call it “The Bloody Noses,” and it would be an improvement!

  9. Bruce A Munro Says:

    Don’t sit under the eyeball tree with anyone else but me…

  10. Emster Says:

    I’m with @fred on this one – adult version of James and the Giant Peach. I was going to say “weird adult version of JATGP”, but JATGP is delightfully weird to begin with… to the glee of every oddball eccentric kid out there.

  11. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Bruce: more like “don’t bleed under the eyeball tree with anyone else but me.”

    In other news, I have a number of truly awful covers to submit, but the submit thingy isn’t working for me. Is there another way? I wouldn’t want GSS to miss a whole bunch more Laser Books covers before I dispose of them. The finest 70s daftness available. I could more than triple the amount we already have!
    https://www.goodshowsir.co.uk/?tag=laser-books

  12. Ryan Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: I feel like the covers of the Laser Books were just a bunch of figure studies that Kelly Freas had lying around in various stacks of papers. The Canadian publisher would shake the deck, select two or three items, and as long as one of them was a head shot, mash them together and go off for lunch.

  13. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: it’s like an orange juice advertisement, where they’ll work in an actual orange along with the carton or bottle of orange dubiousness.

    “100% all-natural rose blood; Lamia tested, Lamia approved!”

  14. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: it’s like an orange juice advertisement, where they’ll work in an actual orange along with the carton or bottle of orange dubiousness.

    “100% all-natural rose blood; Lamia tested, Lamia approved!”

  15. Leak Says:

    @BAM: I do like rose Lamias; dunno what color their blood is, though…

  16. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Ryan: Definitely not Kelly’s best work, but a man’s gotta eat. He probably churned out a couple of these per day and handed them off like you said.

    One I’ve got doesn’t have the giant floating head!

  17. Hammy Says:

    That eyeball tree is infested with boob-worms….

  18. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @TagW: Whenever you get back from your holiday, please check your Gmail address, and be sitting down on something padded. For lo, I have provided not one, not two, but EIGHT Laser Books covers. I only managed art direction for one or two, though. Includes a rare one sans floating head with naff hairdo!

    It should provide hours of fun for the GSS gang.

    (Are we a gang or an unorthodox collective of art critics who’ve watched too much Monty Python?)

  19. Tat Wood Says:

    @ex-Noob: define ‘too much’.

  20. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Tat: That’s the joke. I suppose watching nothing but MP 24/7 for days at a time, a la Howard Hughes and “Ice Station Zebra” would be “too much”.

    On 6-24 hour drives through empty, flat, boring spaces, MPFC albums (incl. Spamalot) helped keep us going.

    Anyway, the 8 covers are in @Tag W’s in-box, and I hope everyone will think they’re so bad they’re a Good Show Sir!

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