Jul 25

Is hell in italics worse than hell without?Click for full image

Tom M Comments:But look! LOOK AT IT! Finally, the truth about women, revealed for all to see!
Published 1969

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.86 out of 10)

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23 Responses to “Conjure Wife”

  1. Sophaloaf Says:

    could easily say the same about men… damn love—the worst spell in the world.

  2. THX 1138 Says:

    I say, I say, I say, what do you get if you cross a wife with a firework? Er, I dunno, this cover probably…

  3. Jaouad Says:

    Hm, cover text aimed at a (straight) male readership. How novel.

  4. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Tragically, Ang Lee was reading this very volume when the script for The Hulk came in.

  5. Yoss Says:

    Like I need another thing to worry about. What with, postal carriers all being cyborg government spy drones. Then there’s the issue with my neighbor’s dog — he’s been saying some pretty messed up stuff lately. And the squirrels… actually I’m afraid to even say what I think they might be up to.

  6. Smith Says:

    Is she wrapped in green cling film, or does she just have the worst cold ever?

  7. fred Says:

    More like Paintball Wife.

  8. Adam Roberts Says:

    Mmmm! Minty!

  9. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    You guys like my new tie-dye shirt?

  10. Tom Noir Says:

    Half-witch wife, half-cactus, ALL HORROR!

  11. drlemaster Says:

    And when they say hell, they mean, his mother-in-law Andora stops by for a visit.

  12. Jami Says:

    @Drlemaster – You mean Endora.

    If all women were witches and could control men, there’d be no super model industry. Or thin women what so ever.

  13. Rachel J Says:

    Ha, ha. Fritz must have just had one hell of a breakup with his girlfriend…

    And while I’m here–

    –Jami, believe me, not all thin females are that way just because we’re dieting to impress men (or whatever you think the deal is). I resent this implication, actually.

    *turns him into a frog*


  14. Jerk of all Trades Says:

    Hah, witches with the power to make men do whateeever they want.

    I know Leiber most likely meant it as a frightening prospect, but damn it, man, I grew up on the internet, and I can’t read the back of this book without remembering some of the more amusingly inept stories I’ve been forwarded over the years.

    Of course, Lieber’s story would have far better grammar and punctuation than any unintentionally-hilarious fetish wank you’d run across online. There is that.

  15. THX 1138 Says:

    This was actually made into a film called Night of the Eagle which is highly entertaining, so the book might be pretty good.

  16. David Cowie Says:

    “All women are witches and secretly control their husbands’ actions”

    I feel moderately confident that domestic violence does not feature in this novel.

  17. hestia Says:

    Damn. Leiber found us out.

  18. Power Hydrant Says:

    “Conjure Wife” sounds like something a CAPTCHA would randomly generate.

  19. FearofMusic Says:

    The two word answer to how a sci-fi fantasy geek can ever hope to see a naked woman in his bed.

  20. Tat Wood Says:

    @FearofMusic: what makes you think they’re all male? You should get out more.

  21. FearofMusic Says:

    @Tat…(blushing) Sadly, too true.

  22. Ray P Says:

    “…take a look at anyone else’s wife.”

    Penguin Books accepts no liability for the consequences.

  23. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Harvey’s worst nightmare.

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