Aug 21

Dam it, I blew this all up again. If only I had depth perception.Click for full image

Hey guys, well I have the chips, beers, d20’s, cigars ….. and so I told them for the cover just put a large cybernetic cat man pondering meanly into the distance whilst standing in the midst of an exploded wasteland. *coughs* Why are you looking at me like that? …. Oh right, I forgot the dip!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.64 out of 10)

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24 Responses to “Man-Kzin Wars IX”

  1. Roses Says:

    I’ve only had one cup of coffee this morning, so I have to start off with an apology, my braincells take awhile to kick it.

    About this cover…


    I’ll have to come back later, when I’m coherent.

  2. SI Says:

    (It’s Howling Time!)

    Oh yes…. oh yes….

    Someone actually suggested they put that there.

  3. Roses Says:

    This is the third time I’ve been back…that cover is not getting better. In fact, I keep noticing more details I wish would have passed me by.

    Why does the cyberwerecat have cables going from his eye to…?

    Given he’s standing over a burning wreck, isn’t his arse getting singed?

    Is it, infact, a ‘him’?

    So many questions, so little time. Not enough coffee.

  4. SI Says:

    Yea there is so many great qualities to this cover!

    The head to me looks amazing out of proportion to the rest of the body.

    You know… the only way you might answer your questions Roses might be to actually read the book! 😛

    It’s coffee time for me too! Woooo!

  5. CSA Says:

    awesome cover!

    Is there something severly wrong with cat dudes right shoulder/breast?
    Either he has a massive ball of fat infront of his arm, or the arm is growing out of his chest.

    I can just imagine the discussion with the authors:
    “You guys like the Terminator movie? You guys like tigers? … I think between the four of us we can write a best-seller about this”

    the “its howling time” is hilarious too

  6. little mi Says:

    I love it! So many things of wonders:
    The ‘It’s Howling Time!’ is just classic. The title font speaks to me of some kind of Star Wars meets He-Man mash-up. The surely impractical eye cabling. The ‘I’m just hanging out here by the burning building modelling my shiny gun’ pose and lets not miss the girdle! Does our terminator/tiger hero have a secret paunch?

    I could go on but I wouldn’t want to spoil your lunch.

  7. little mi Says:

    …in fact I’m so overwhelmed I can’t even seem to spell check my responses!

  8. SI Says:

    Yea… there’s not much room for his spare change in that body suit!

    And is the thing on the right side actually one of those alarm motion sensors? Maybe he only destroys when something sets it off.

  9. Chris Says:

    What makes this cover so great is the way that every single thing about it is bad, not just the hilarious art of the Tiger Terminator. A ridiculous overlong title with an unpronounceable alien name in it, an eighties heavy metal style font, seven different fonts over the cover in five different typefaces, a design that makes it look like the cover designer has just slapped the elements of the cover together in 5 minutes so that the art becomes squashed into the middle and has the authors’ names overlapping the tiger’s head, a horrible clashing colour scheme of orange, purple, and yellow, and of course “(It’s Howling Time)”, the fact that it’s in brackets as well makes it even funnier.

  10. Roses Says:

    I’m back again, I couldn’t help myself.

    This is car crash book covers. Or rather space-ship crash.

    CSA is right. I think the Terminator Tiger is actually a breast cancer survivor and had to have a masectomy, which is why the suit fits more than a little bit oddly on the chest.

    No force on this universe could get me to part with my hard-earned cash to buy the book, or give up the 5 mins needed to read it.

  11. SI Says:

    Haha yea Chris it really does look like someone has slapped that together in paint! And why the heck is the authors names in two different colours?

    And Roses, thinking about it. How could you just read that book and not all in the series. There is unfortunatly quite a few:

    And possible a couple more covers from the series to come at a later date 😉

  12. CSA Says:

    My housemate says hes read them… and they aren’t too bad.
    But this is all about the covers, and that cover is just a train wreck.
    The authors must slap themselves in the face everytime they read that “(It’s Howling time)”, one of their lives greatest regrets..

    I dont think i could ever make eye contact with any human being that ever saw me with that cover… there would be embarassment, and a little bit of pride in the glorious awfulness of it… but mostly embarrassment.

  13. Roses Says:

    CSA…OMG! I thought the fact that there were 9 in the series were bad enough. I followed the link…there are more…much more. I think we will have many more hours of fun to come.

    I hope the books come with brown paper bags and faux Danielle Steel covers.

  14. JustinLeego Says:

    I took a photo of this very book just the other day! Good to know it’s already in there.

    Never did a corset look so threatening.

  15. Karl Says:

    The Lion King movie + Tom of Finland + the words “In space!” = this cover.

  16. Sorcha Says:

    His hed iz pastede on yay!

  17. Brian B Says:

    Oh great Sorcha, now I have an urge to create an entire website using the Man-Kzin War covers and add lolcat captions to them! ;p

    But I woud so LOVE to be in the room when authors like Niven and Anderson see covers like these for the first time. I mean for a new author in the field I imagine they would be happy just be published. But Niven and Anderson were quite, quite famous by the time this book came out.

    I can imagine the scene: Larry Niven–shoulder bag slung over his shoulder lashing back and forth with his angry stride like the whipcord tail of a Terminator Kitty–storms into his editor’s office. He slams down a copy of Man-Kizn Wars IX, the cover discolored in places from his tears of rage. Drawing himself up to his full height he opens his mouth and takes in a deep breath to prepare for a paint-blistering tirade. Niven’s editor moves with the the incredible correction speed of editors across the multiverse, like a pen quickly marking a comma splice his hand is a blur as he shoves a cheque into Niven’s open mouth and says, “Shut up Larry.” Niven chews thoughtfully, tastes the number of zeroes on the cheque, nods his head in acquiescence.

  18. Tom Noir Says:

    Question: do anthropomorphic space tigers really NEED a head full of lush, wavy black hair? I mean, he’s already covered in fur and wearing armor.


  19. Rev Says:

    This is a work of art. I hereby declare that I will read this entire series.
    (It’s Howling Time!)

  20. Severian 67 Says:

    The appearance of the surname Chafe did make me think, “I’ll bet that that’s exactly what that gusset does.”

  21. A.R.Yngve Says:

    So the alien on the cover is named “Ix”, then?

  22. A.R.Yngve Says:

    The artist wanted the alien to chew on a cigar, but the editor insisted that would be over the top.

  23. GSS noob Says:

    This is a perfect example of BAEN!, which here on GSS is just another day. But It’s Howling Time! is extra-special, and most importantly, THE PARENTHESES!

    It’s the parentheses that really take this over the top.

    To what, I’m not sure.

  24. Calyx Says:

    Man-Kzin. Isn’t the correct response “Bless you”, while proffering a tissue?

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