Nov 27

80's exercise videos were so odd...Click for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: Ziggy Stardust and the all-girl Devo tribute band are about to take the stage!
Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.71 out of 10)

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30 Responses to “Children of the Lens”

  1. THX 1138 Says:

    I’ve heard of a man with three buttocks, but a man with three breasts?!

  2. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Are they singing and dancing?

  3. Phil Says:

    I think I would have erred on the side of caution, and space-sheeped the triple-boob.

    Certainly demanding of a “font problems” tag, although you’ve got to admire that droopy S with enclosed 6.

  4. Tag Wizard Says:

    Ah, the eternal question – is it a font problem or font flair?

    I’m still hoping to find a black and white cat hidden somewhere within this illustration, even though it most likely falls within the Pre-Orson Ouvre.

  5. Tat Wood Says:

    Edward Elmer Smith PhD. A true prophet. Not only did he provide almost all the space-age terminology for ‘Star Trek’ in the forties but be foresaw the Nolan Sisters.

  6. Tom Noir Says:

    “Oh god! I sneezed out Kraftwerk!”

  7. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Tom at #6: ROTFL worthy. 🙂

  8. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    The last crew to try this ploy had been ambushed by tentacles and lost their trousers!

  9. fred Says:

    A ‘The Producers’ Broadway scam using the Fantastic Four and Dr. Doom COULD work, if the Four were female quadruplets and Doom had a boom-box on his chest.

  10. dpn Says:

    Amazing; there is ting everywhere except on the metal suit.

  11. FearõfMusïc Says:

    @Tag Wizard: This would seem to be begging for that ‘interpetive dance’ tag. Among other things.

  12. Rags Says:

    What the hell is going on in this cover…i mean…..WTF? Power rangers without their masks?

    What is with the orgasmic giant face as well?

  13. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Not sure what’s going on, but maybe they’re doing a riff on “Brown Girl In The Ring”:

    Cyborg in the ring
    tra-la-la la-la!
    there’s a cyborg in the ring
    tra la-la-la-la-la!
    Cyborg in the ring
    tra-la-la la-la!
    He looks like a wannabe RoboCop, tra-la-la!

  14. Lionrock Says:

    Is this an early rehearsal for the seminal Sarah Brightman & Hot Gossip hit “I lost my Heart to a Starship Trooper”:

  15. Stevie T Says:

    Hey Tag Wiz–This just sings out for some “interpretive dance” love…

    @A.R, Yngve @13: Dangit, you beat me to it! That was the first thing I thought of when I saw this! Although you came up with better lyrics…

  16. A.R.Yngve Says:

    A lot of these cheesy covers look better if you play “I lost my Heart to a Starship Trooper” in the background (that song is definitely a “guilty pleasure” of mine…).

  17. Tag Wizard Says:

    Truth, Stevie T! You know what else it sings out for? An author tag, a series tag, and there’s something else that I hadn’t seen, but now I have seen, I just can’t unsee… now what was it…

  18. Jaouad Says:

    It’s always embarrassing when you misplace your glasses and have to squint in order to find your home planet.

    Doubly so when you’re called The Famous Lensman.

  19. B. Chiclitz Says:

    It was only when Ken, still completely lacking his own proper apparatus, dared to grow the third boob that the Barbies had had enough. Clad in tasteful, color-coordinated jumpsuits, they slowly, menacingly, closed in.

  20. Lionrock Says:

    Total Recall 2: This time Arnie has the third boob.

  21. Mongoose Says:

    Go Go Power Lensman! Mighty Morphin Power Lensman!

    For more obscure but more fitting: “Lensmanplanet”.

  22. anon Says:

    Ok. Now, who’s “The Len”?

  23. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    I see the “booties” tag, but I’m not seeing any on the cover…the girls have rather flat looking behinds if you ask me…

  24. A.R.Yngve Says:

    The song is obviously “Baby’s Got No Back” by Sir White-A-Bread.

  25. Tom Noir Says:

    Mighty Androgynous Power Rangers!

  26. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It just hit me: No one thought of the pun “Jazz Hands”. We should all be ashamed…

  27. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Now I’ve read one of the books in the series too, FIRST LENSMAN. (Well, listened to it at .)
    How bad was it?
    The author deserves covers like these.

  28. Perry Armstrong Says:

    As great as this cover is (and it is truly awesome), nothing says ‘Lensman’ like Rod Taylor in jodhpurs:

  29. anon Says:

    “I want a three-boobed guy with an O face and glowing arms. Add four baffled and bemused identical-twin ladies forming a circle around him. And make the O face also the background.”

  30. Monty Says:

    The cover semi-accurately depicts a scene from the book, psionically rescuing their father from eternal banishment.

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