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Sep 30

Number 1 of a Series ... if anyone buys itClick for larger image

Kilgore Comments: You would think Frazetta would know how to paint feet.

Published 1968

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.75 out of 10)
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16 Responses to “The Serpent”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    *Wondering whether to post a comment about the glitch that will look confusing to anyone reading this after it’s fixed*

  2. fred Says:

    Half a glitched serpent is better than no unglitched serpent at all.

  3. Francis Boyle Says:

    Now that I think about it browser placeholder images are a bit crap. Maybe I should write an extension that replaces them with random pictures of cute kittens.

  4. Tat Wood Says:

    Does this mean (be still my beating heart)…

    The return of Technical Difficulties?

  5. Tor Mented Says:

    Best use of the “font problems” tag.

  6. Tag Wizard Says:

    Glitz fixed. It’s our fault for hiring web developers from the Unknown Hackers Institute.

  7. Francis Boyle Says:

    Smart Lady. She can grope herself with her own hair.

  8. Bibliomancer Says:

    I have a feeling Frazetta sent in one of his usual naked broad paintings and Paperback Library said “add a snake and some crotch armor and you’ve got yourself a book cover deal!”

  9. Anna T. Says:

    That’s some really still water? she’s standing in.

    Or Frazetta wasn’t in a foot-painting mood.

    Your pick.

  10. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “When constipation sets in, try SERPEN-EX Laxative – with the wonder ingredient Scale Extract that makes relief run smoother.

    “SERPEN-EX – makes relief as smooth as a slithering snake.”

  11. Verylatetotheparty Says:

    @Anna T. -The serpent says the feet look quite realistic.

  12. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Bibliomancer—I think you have nailed it, Good Sir—I’ve found several other covers for this gem. Most of them feature a giant dodo bird, as in
    this example. It’s a good bet that Paperback Library felt that a repurposed Frazetta damsel, with part of a photoshopped snake, would still be a better draw even without the dodo bird.

  13. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Best “look ma no feet” use — they made it really obvious.

    I think the woman and snake were literally cropped out of some other Frazetta work. Or two. Pretty sure Frank knew how to paint feet. And he always had rocky backgrounds — not the “figures floating in mid air” type. So either this was literally cut and pasted, or maybe the lady and the snake are in some very shallow, very opaque liquid? The famous Beige Mud of Atlantis?

    Not only is it extreme “font problems”, it’s got decorative squiggles. Making sure you don’t miss the deathless blurb prose.

    I still want a “mighty thews” tag. Yon princess is very muscled. Those thighs can take on anything, be it snake or general.

    @ARY: Not the intent, but certainly what was achieved.

    @B’man, BC: You are correct. I’ve had a look at all the covers, and while some are merely “meh”, many are even dafter. Really. Check ISFDB for a larf.

  14. THX 1139 Says:

    Her blurb-reading pose reminds me of Pigs in Space where the Muppets would look around to see where the voiceover was coming from.

  15. A.R.Yngve Says:

    We sincerely apologize for the above cover. The people responsible for it have been sacked. The cover has now been replaced at the last minute and at great expense…

    THE MØØSE
    Cilla – Princess øf Sweden – must seduce and kill a general whø is ønly part human. A savage støry øf cønsensual lust signed in triplicate, viølently løng meetings and lutefisk by
    JANE GASKELL
    and Børk the Møøse

  16. GSS ex-noob Says:

    I’d sooner read THE MØØSE.

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