Good Show Sir

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Rachel J’s Art Direction: Mark, *nothing* happens in this yawn-fest, so let’s go with the general girl-power-in-space-with-crystals theme from the earlier books. Pink-and-purple colour scheme, huge embossed title in neon yellow, rocketships, chick in the foreground holding up a sparkly rainbow crystal. Oh, and make her look awed. What? No, I said “awed”, not “bored!” But hey, “bored” works too.
Published 1993

(Average: 4.57 out of 10)

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MisterBOB Comments: In Space Jam Jars are Rather Useful…
Published 1980

(Average: 5.53 out of 10)

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Claire’s Art Direction: Hum, riders on the wind. Well obviously lots of wind in a pretty colour, and a rider – I know, a naked chick with body tats. Throw in some standard fantasy stuff, like a castle and a wizard dude et voila!
Published 1988

(Average: 4.59 out of 10)

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Marcus’ Art Direction: Fredric Brown mostly wrote short stories with twist endings. So let’s have a twist ending to the cover! But, at the same time, semi-naked women sell books. So we should have one of them. Not too big, though, we want lots of nice black space around.
Published 1980

(Average: 7.39 out of 10)

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Tom Noir’s Art Direction: Now look Horne, you’re a good artist, but you’ve got a thing or two to learn. See, this cover of yours, it’s just not realistic. Does this guy look like he just walked out of an explosion? No. He still has body hair. The fire would have burned it all off! Take this back and I don’t want to see it again until it looks like he’s fresh from a wax job.
Published 1994

(Average: 7.36 out of 10)

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Updated IMAX version of cover

Joachim’s Art Direction: “Raw adventure” — with a whip, in underwear, make sure there’s a rocket… you know what I mean… it’s science fiction.
Published 1974

(Average: 8.28 out of 10)

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Corey Comments: A naked woman on fire. Thanks Orson Scott Card.
Published 1979

(Average: 7.60 out of 10)

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Alessandra’s Art Direction: I want the main characters looking soulful, or at least sulky. I want the woman on the left missing her frontal lobes, but balance it out with piles of sausage curls on the woman below. Give the woman on the right a freakishly small body and no flesh on her arms, no ribcage, in fact no anatomy at all. Dress them in brightly colored Renaissance fair castoff costumes — don’t forget the purple! Oh, and put in a horse because you do them so well. Make its wings as sloppy as you like; we’re going to cover them with the title anyway.
Published 1978

(Average: 6.32 out of 10)

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Frank Comments: Helmets for men only because we wouldn’t want to mess up the lady officers’ hair. And if we’re seeing the forward view, I hope they’re looking at the rear view mirror.
Published 1980

(Average: 6.22 out of 10)

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Janet’s Art Direction: Okay, fine, you’re an “artist”… you can paint your own cover.
Published 1991

(Average: 7.49 out of 10)

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