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Jan 08

Black Knight of the Iron Sphere

15 Comments »

A rope-skipping duel to the deathClick for larger image

Ump’s Art Direction: We’re through with goofy covers: this time we want something simple and classic. So we want a blond guy who’s wearing no pants to jump through the air with a sword trying to stick it in a space gorilla. Yeah – a blue space gorilla that has a giant space gorilla head growing out of its back. And we want a gal in a stripper outfit in the background and she’s turned like she’s pretending to look way because she’s embarrassed, but if you look at her eyes peeking back because she’s really into it. Like I said: simple and classic.

Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.86 out of 10)
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Oct 24

The Night of the Wolf

12 Comments »

I demand walkies!Click for larger image

Lord Kelvin Comments: Spoiler alert: the “giant wolf-creature” turned out to be a Halloween mask on a stick.

Published 1972

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.67 out of 10)
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Feb 08

The Marrow Eaters

23 Comments »

Electricity. Bad!Click for larger image

Klaatu Comments: Check out the Ting! on that bling!

Published 1972

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.64 out of 10)
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Jan 08

Lord of the Trees

19 Comments »

Lord GaystrokeClick for larger image

Bibliomancer Comments: “No puppet. No puppet. You’re the puppet!”

Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.50 out of 10)
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Nov 02

Seven Tickets to Hell

26 Comments »

... and Two Tickets to Paradise!Click for larger image

Tag Wizard Comments: Skulls a-Poppin’, Jazz Hands, Eye-yi-yi, BEHIND YOU! … keep spinning that tag wheel Mr Morrow. Every one’s a winner!

Published 1972

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.36 out of 10)
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Sep 22

Lord Tedric

21 Comments »

This deserves a BEHIND YOU! tag but I don't know who's behind whatClick for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: “Like my new Snake Love Seat? I bought it at Furniture Village. Do you think it’s too gaudy?”

Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.06 out of 10)
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Jun 22

Thongor of Lemuria

30 Comments »

Thongor has a showdown with the guy who's been cheating with his wife.Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: “Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape” said the gorilla.

Published 1966

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.56 out of 10)
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Oct 19

Norstrilia

29 Comments »

Don't let looks deceive you... this chair is actually incredibly uncomfortable.Click for full image

Mirrie’s Art Direction: Sci-fi villians must be as campy as possible. Hmmm, maybe give him a chair made of antlers like Jareth from Labyrinth had, and have him wearing a gold suit. 70’s babe on the left of him, sinister chimp-surgeon to the right. And behind them all looms the Angel of Death, looking like if Peter Capaldi played Grandpa Rick.
Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.88 out of 10)
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Sep 20

Among the Dead and Other Events Leading to the Apocalypse

22 Comments »

Look out dearest, here comes a man with better eyebrows than you.Click for full image

Clay Comments:This junior-high rendition of what seems to be a mad scientist and his platinum-haired babe along with their webbed victims has absolutely nothing to do with this book. Bryant is a very literary writer with a New Wave bent.
Published 1974

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.83 out of 10)
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Jul 23

Man of Many Minds

16 Comments »

I... melt... EVERYTHING!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Many minds? He’s got many minds?! Well that means one thing which of course makes perfect sense. With more minds comes more… ummm… laser eyes! Science fact!
Published 1968

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.84 out of 10)
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