Good Show Sir

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Alessandra Comments: The cover isn’t really awful, although it is pretty behind the curve for 1975. What got me was the hideous font lightning effect, the confusing typography (the title is actually “The Blood Stones”), and the extreme genericness of the cover — oh, and the Conan-gets-a-mullet hairdo.
Published 1975

(Average: 6.92 out of 10)

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Libraryman Comments: I just don’t understand what good those wings will be.
Published 1984

(Average: 5.54 out of 10)

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Art Direction: We all know the one thing vampires suffer from. Bighanditis! What do you mean that isn’t a thing? Of course it’s a thing, a vampire thing! Look it says right here in the book of ‘Your Pay Check’! Now, just draw some kid, in a cloak, looking like he should be in a broadway musical. And make his hands BIG!
Published 1985

(Average: 8.05 out of 10)

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Janet’s Art Direction: Okay, fine, you’re an “artist”… you can paint your own cover.
Published 1991

(Average: 7.49 out of 10)

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Jon’s Art Direction: Oh, just pick some stuff from the clipart. It’s about a time machine, so make sure you put a clock in there!
Published 1965

(Average: 7.85 out of 10)

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SteveAsat Comments: You know what robots really don’t need? Polio. For more than three decades I have wondered whether anything even remotely resembling this scene appears in the novel. But it’s Saberhagan, so the mere thought of flipping through the actual text induces naptime.
Published 1981

(Average: 6.44 out of 10)

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Muttley’s Art Direction: A Wizard, right? You know, caped, with magic sparks or something. Big Hair (TM) too.
Published 1986

(Average: 7.23 out of 10)

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Greengerg Comments: Poor Lin Carter, surely he won the lifetime award for the biggest string of terrible paperback covers. In this classic, the sad golden gargoyle refuses to join the revelers with their horns of ale, perhaps because he cannot figure out why a guy with such bizarre body proportions got to be the hero.
Published 1976

Many thanks to Green!

(Average: 7.64 out of 10)

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GK comments: Donkey Kong meets Short Round.
Published 1983

Many thanks to GK!

(Average: 7.97 out of 10)

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The great artists of our time had a formula for where the human eye would automatically look to when presented with a work of art. At that precise point I know exactly what we need. A huge horse’s head, in pain, as it gets speared by a crazed redhead.

(Average: 6.38 out of 10)

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