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MisterBOB Comments: Looks like it’s been over-painted until the paint has turned to mud.
Tagged with: bikini • bladed weapons • cleavage • damsel • dude • Faux-nan • Jeffrey M. Wallmann • loincloth • monsters • muscles • Romas Kukalis • shiny oh so shiny • sword • Tower books
Ah Jeffrey MassiveLensFlare. One of my favourite authors.
Vantro’s forearms are ridiculously skinny for the amount of muscle definition. Maybe he’s got really small bones?
The Richard Dadd/ Boris Vallejo crossover we’ve all been awaiting – the Faerie Feller’s Monster Truck.
Captain Kirk’s been in the gym. “Goodbye, Jim!”
I can’t tell from the pic if the ‘damsel’ is standing on something. If not, she’s a world class gymnast! Who is having an orgasm.
A faux-Conan story calls for a faux-Frazetta cover.
http://images.alibris.com/imageid/2010113321.jpg I had a sniff around for a better image. Oddly enough, few if any of the second-hand dealers were prepared to share this. I did find images for a Tina Wallman, but they aren’t really the same thing.
The rich blacks, the striking highlights…. This is reminiscent of the rare beauty usually only associated with velvet paintings.
How many mighty Vantros are there that they need to be named by their profession?
At first glance, I thought the cover said “Vantro the barbarian turns his thighly powers against the sinister Faeries”
The cover may be muddy-looking, but notice that they highlighted her breasts, clearly the most important element of the composition.
Hey, that barbarian looks kinda like… could it be… no, it couldn’t be..
“IIII HAVVE THE POWWERRRRR!!!”
[Duh-duh duhruh duh-duhruh duh-duh, HE-MAN!]
True story:: my old college professor wrote this ‘masterpiece’. He was a single dad and needed to sell as much pulp fiction as possible to care for his son and himself. One of my favorite profs.
Shirtless barbarian…check. Scantily clad princess(bikini!)…check.
Monster…check. Wicked looking sword..check. Absolute cliche of a tag line…check. Quality artwork and talented writing…er,well.
This book was pretty good. I read it at least a dozen times. It does have one or 2 sex scenes in it and I must have been 13?
Yeah…totally bought it for the cover. It didn’t disappoint.
*squints to read the text*
Oh! I know this game. *starts to clap* “The sinister Fanes are silly Fanes, the sinister Fanes are stupid Fanes…”
Vantro the barbarian? No wonder he started the ‘roids.
Did you know that “Vantro” is Norwegian for “infidel”? Fact! Not made up!
I should point out the cover says Jeffrey N. Wallmann.
Shiny vicar returning to his feast decrees a ban against interruptions. Priest bashes the Boshan swarm.
Beyond the rim of flare-light
My love is bored with sword-fight
I know he’ll find in cephalopod thrashing
Love, strange love (no hentai-bashing)
His journey ends, I know sir,
Death Trek post, Good Show Sir!
But tell him while he wanders his inky sea
He’d look good in this bikini!
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