May 19

Crap you got the southern judge, he hates windows.Click for full image

Sarah Comments: I love everything about this. The floating COM-PU-TOR in the witness chair. The fact that in the FU-TAR we still have traditional, human-run courts. The mobbed-up, dark-glasses wearing judge. The spider web.

I wish every computer looked like that! Many thanks to Sarah!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.36 out of 10)

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30 Responses to “The Venetian Court”

  1. Si Says:

    Wow, I have to admit I love this cover. I’d gladly read it in public with pride. 🙂

  2. Simon Says:

    I’d be more worried about the spider that span a web that big than I would be by any floating robot however meglomaniacal its plans and awkward to use its keyboard.

  3. SophaLoaf Says:

    So that is where my Easy Bake oven went.

  4. SI Says:

    “And I sentence you to death, your 2 mega byte tape spool will be removed. But before that mind if I check my twitter account?”

    Today… I am HILARIOUS… hilarious I tell you.

  5. Ian Sales Says:

    That’s not a judge, that’s Stan Lee. And since when did they have a US flag in Italian courts?

  6. James Lovegrove Says:

    Stan Lee! The judge is Stan Lee!

    I’d happily be tried in a court where Stan the Man presides. “I hereby sentence you to a life of great power and great responsibility, True Believer. Excelsior. ‘Nuff said!”

  7. James Lovegrove Says:

    Bah, Ian nipped in there with a Stan Lee comment seconds before I did.

  8. Phil Nichols Says:

    Aww, we ALL thought it was Stan Lee. Mind you, perhaps that explains the otherwise inexplicable Spidey web.

  9. DeadRobot Says:


  10. Brian B Says:

    Agreed: Judge is Stan Lee
    Agreed: That explains the spider web
    Agreed: That computer is totally an Easy Bake Oven

    Not sure if that oven is WiFi enabled. You have might have to set up a different set of punch cards for that.

  11. cutmanmike Says:

    I’d read this one

  12. Adam Roberts Says:

    Mocking the computer because it looks a little dated, eh? If it’s so dated, then how come it’s got Google Chrome logos for eyes? Eh?

  13. Adam Roberts Says:

    Also: Stan Lee! That judge! Stan Lee!

  14. e.lee Says:

    Some kid’s science project is on trial: there’s a freezer compartment next to the computer’s eyes, and a cassette deck below them.

  15. Kathleen Says:

    DeadRobot just killed me

  16. Seth Green's Attention Span Says:

    Reminds me of the Dr. Ball sketch on Robot Chicken’s Star Wars.

  17. Counter Culture Clown Says:

    Why are computers in the future oddly similar to computers in the past? I knew the iPad was going to lead to terrible things…

  18. Bookworm Bas Says:

    Thanks for posting this one. I’ve only read “The Rose” and a couple of short stories by Harness but they were quite good. He gets enthusiastic raps from other SF authors too. Shame he didn’t write much. I wouldn’t be suprised if this isn’t another case of don’t judge a book by it’s cover. After all how often do you think the artists actually read the books or get to talk to the author.

  19. Mat T Says:

    “In the Venetian Court, justice is Blind!” A ha ha, *hic*, ha!

  20. John T Says:

    “…can you show me on the circuit diagram where he touched you?”

  21. Tom Noir Says:

    This model was discontinued after users kept putting soup in it, thinking it was the microwave.

  22. Jaouad Says:

    I designed that font when I was 14 and bored during maths class.

  23. Tat Wood Says:

    In the future, Venice will be underwater. And they’ll fly American flags in courtrooms. There’s a Doge/ Dodge City joke to be found but it’s too hot today.

  24. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘And how long have you worked for Volkswagen, Mr. Visconti?’

  25. DaveM Says:

    Of course it’s a VENETIAN court, because justice is BLIND! (boom tish!)

    I’ll see myself out.

  26. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Dave M—Thanks, I’ve always had a soft spot for slatstick humor.

  27. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Pimpbot 5000, the verdict of the jury is that you are guilty of forcing innocent Blackberries into prostitution –”

    “I’LL – CUT – YOU – MAN”

    “Order in court!”

  28. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Will the witness please show the court where the accused touched it… the disk port? Can the lawyer to the witness confirm if was Disk Port 1 or 2?”

  29. Perry Armstrong Says:

    @A.R.Yngve(22): I can totally see ‘The Master’s Tardis as Computer Bank’ from Underground Toys ‘Time Monster action figure set’ being used as a court-approved doll in this scenario.

  30. GSS noob Says:

    Apparently Judge Stan Lee (yes, obviously) lets his boy Pete hang around (hahahaha) in the courtroom. Mind you, if the Easy Bake Oven has gone bad enough to be put on trial, being able to web it up would be useful.

    As to the US flag: the courtroom is in Venice, California. It’s an easy commute for Stan, being part of LA.

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