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Mar 11

Sex and the High Command

19 Comments »

Nothing sexier than a huge apple!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: When I said I wanted a New Model Army this is NOT what I had in mind.
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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May 24

Star Crossed

22 Comments »

Not breathing in space is so romantic...Click for full image

Jami Comments: I’ll just let everyone else make their own captions for Space Fabio. You know, lingerie in space doesn’t seem practical.
Published 1995

Back Cover Here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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Feb 14

The Vor Game 2

11 Comments »

All children with very defined square chins are drafted into military service.Click for full image

Mangraa’s Art Direction: We need a different cover for the Vor Game! Do that, “soldier being led to jail”, scene we talked about. Only make the prisoner a clone… no, a SMALLER VERSION clone of the Captain! Genius! And make sure the Captain smells what mini-clone did while crossing the Captain’s path. Irresistible!
Published 1990

You might remember me from here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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Dec 04

At the Earth’s Core

31 Comments »

Drill, Baby, Drill!Click for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: Finally an explanation for the Earth’s molten core. A crucible in a subterranean foundry!
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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Dec 16

The Golden Slave

21 Comments »

Oh sorry were you whipping me? I fell asleep...Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: “Very well Mistress Raven, I want you to whip me gently until I am hit with my next great cover inspiration. Don’t spare the buttocks. And remember my safe words: poul anderson.”
Published 1980

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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Oct 12

Challenge to Dracula

18 Comments »

Eddie Munster, the later yearsClick for larger image

Good Show Sir Comments: Dracula was told he would look prettier if he smiled more.

Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.89 out of 10)
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Oct 12

The Great Works of Jewish Fantasy & Occult

19 Comments »

COFFEE!! I need some, can't think of a caption today. New neighbours that have moved in with horrific faces? Ah who cares. COFFEE!!Click for full image

Alessandra Comments: I think they were going for a cutting-edge symbolic look, some sort of classical reference to alchemical historical scholarship. But they just look goofy. Oh god, that eye.
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.88 out of 10)
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Sep 16

People of the Talisman

11 Comments »

A He-mullet and a cat-suit! You are out done sir alien thing, hand over the weapon! Whatever it may be!Click for full image

Adam S Comments: So this is what He-Man sees when he’s tripping on acid.
Published 1964

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.88 out of 10)
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Mar 28

The Rainbow Sword

31 Comments »

I cut hard and I play hard!Click for full image

MisterBOB Comments: Rainbow Sword, nuff said?
Published 1990

Many thanks to MisterBOB!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.88 out of 10)
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Dec 09

Boundary

25 Comments »

This is my first experiment! Just wait till you see my second one! Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: I see it looking like Jurassic Park, only more space-ship-ey.
Published 2006

I don’t have much time this week to go through the rigorous cover selection criteria…
So welcome, to ‘Tom Noir week’!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.88 out of 10)
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