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Nov 07

Say the right words and this is what happens on every seaside donkey ride...Click for full image

Joseph Comments: Beautiful woman rides an enchanted jackass. Incidentally, this is how I view most of my female friends and their respective relationship partners.
Published 1982

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.48 out of 10)
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Nov 05

Don't worry my dear, if anyone comes within about a metre of me... I'll get 'em good!Click for full image

Ian Comments: We are the Guardians in Green Leaves. We’d chase you but we are rooted on the spot… on the ice…
Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.17 out of 10)
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Oct 30

Men... always fighting with their snakes... HEYOOOOOOO!Click for full image

Frank Comments: What’s with the nipple jewelry on the lady’s leather armor?
Published 1982

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.43 out of 10)
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Oct 26

If you think these cards are strange... you should see space Top Trumps!Click for full image

Durbin Comments: Book officials were shocked when it was revealed that an elderly parishioner had painted over a deteriorating fresco with a haphazard splattering of paint. “The once-dignified portrait now resembles a crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic,” one official says.
Published 2010 (maybe)

You might remember this from here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.32 out of 10)
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Oct 17

For anyone wondering how CD's work... it works this way... every time you use a CD!Click for full image

Jaouad’s Art Direction: This author sells multi-millions, so I was thinking huge laserdisc with some vaguely operatic characters on it, flying across a landscape of red crystals with a ridiculously large moon in the background. Also a beach girl.
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.29 out of 10)
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Oct 15

Great... now as well as carrying his sweaty ass around I have an over excited naked women... FML...Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: I’m still going through this in my head but surely we can have a man carrying away his damsel on a large fluffy cat beast… beast…bea…breasts! That’s it! Just make sure to have breasts on there too!
Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.26 out of 10)
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Sep 21

It's a well known fact... Gryphons hate leggings!Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: I think a GRYPHON is like a griffin, but hunts ladies of the night?
Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.79 out of 10)
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Sep 18

The Flaming Horse 2000! Offers that incentive for speed and with a great smell of bbq!Click for full image

Frank Comments: This is actually not so terrible a cover. But given that you’ve got two other covers up for this title, I thought you might enjoy this one.
Published 1985

You might remember The Door into Fire from here and here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.88 out of 10)
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Sep 12

Ah.. this explains why you were hearing the universe in your seashellClick for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Look this has to stand out from the rest. But how…. ummm… put a magic sea shell with stars of the universe in it. Have a disinterested man staring at it… and a blue women who is already so bored she’s fallen asleep.
Published 1993

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.62 out of 10)
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Sep 10

That depressing moment when you realise you have the power to control a single large insect...Click for full image

Lauren’s Art Direction: I want explosions! And glowing auras! And giant lizards in cloaks! And some hot kids who go to the gym on a regular basis! Oh, and throw in a scorpion, there’s a sale on the stock photo site.
Published 2011

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.58 out of 10)
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