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Dec 17

Who doesn’t love Swedish sci-fi covers?! Recall the fun we all had with Skeppsbruten på Tschai last year. We recently stumbled upon the delightful WordPress blog “enlitenbloggomrymden” (“small blog space”) which has a wealth of terrible covers from the publisher Lindqvist. These were published from 1969-1971 and I’ve included a few of our favourites below. Have at them and enjoy!

The Swedish Olympic Salamander Dressage TeamOch stjärnornas konungar dö

Plot a course, Mr SuluVindarnas Planet

Swingin' medallions indeedFrämmande Rymdskepp

Moorcock! She screamedSlutstriden

Good Show Sir Comments:

1. Swedish dominatrix says “your safe word is Ochstjärnornaskonungardö”

2. Flavour-sealed for freshness

3. Busted by the fashion police

4. Sluts-a-ridin’

Published 1969-1971

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.86 out of 10)
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Apr 26

Ow! Stop yanking on my eye, lady!Click for larger image

Tor Mented Comments: It never fails! There’s always a snail driver ahead of me in the fast lane.
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.70 out of 10)
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Feb 09

Dinosaur Samurai

'Wasssss-abi'Click for full image

Dinosaur Warriors

Jurassic SnarkClick for full image

Two Tiny Claws

Tyrannosaurus TexClick for full image

Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Comments: If you look carefully, you discover it wasn’t penned by Bradbury himself!

Published 1993, 1994, 1999

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.59 out of 10)
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Dec 09

Lets go show these people what a guy with shoulder pads can do!Click for full image

Mark E’s Art Direction: You know how when you cross a fly, an elephant and a ram you get something really awesome that can outfly a fighter plane? Well give me some of those. Oh – and its Sci-fi so best put a stock image of a planet looming far to close in the sky as well.
Published 1990

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.52 out of 10)
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Sep 02

If I can just cut this sash I can lose the midget and outrun these angry aliens. Click for full image

Bibliomancer’s Art Direction: A centaur-babe with an evil papoose devil-baby being chased by an alien army that looks like surfboards with eyes. Have that on my desk by five! And don’t forget the purse!
Published 1977

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.14 out of 10)
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Aug 18

I think I saw this one on Pimp My RideClick for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: My card must be the Queen of D-Cups.
Published 1987

You might remember this from here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.42 out of 10)
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Aug 05

A Master Race Storyteller - Heidelberg ChronicleClick for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: “Heil Ho … Unicorns!”
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.92 out of 10)
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Jul 22

Yes, yes I agree now... you are better with the mohawk... and I am better with a mullet!Click for full image

Christian Comments: This is truly the fantasy of every elementary school boy. Knight in shining armour with laser gun and sword while riding a dinosaur with a mohawk and ankle spikes. Epic.
Published 2002

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.54 out of 10)
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Jul 01

It's a slimy way to ride... but it gets you there!Click for full image

Erica’s Art Direction: Weird sea horse creature. Check. Scary-looking sword. Check. Hot warrior woman. Check. Leather Vest. Check. Pants. Uh, what? You wanted me to draw pants?
Published 2005

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.09 out of 10)
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Jan 16

Have you been riding around on that all day? Ewww... I'll just walk thanks... or... will I... Yes... yes I will!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

David’s Art Direction: I was up late last night and I’m getting tired, just draw me an alien ostrich on E and a beautiful naked woman. … What do you mean that’s gratuitous? Oh alright, I need sleep, give her a bra then—BUT NO PANTIES!
Published 1977

You might remember this from here.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.51 out of 10)
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