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Apr 18

Fought with the same weapons as World War 2... but with soldier monkeys.Click for full image

Jon H Comments: This one caught me off guard, I thought it was just your typical WW 2 book, maybe a little on the Sgt Rock side of reality but then I noticed the monkey and realized it said WW3. Well…I still don’t understand what the monkey is doing. I’m guess it is a part of some para-military group. “If you need help, and you can find them, maybe you can hire…ooh ooh ah ah AH AAAH!!”
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.42 out of 10)
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Apr 17

A great day... everywhere... for men without nipples. Click for full image

DPN Comments: Finding a bad Baen cover is like shooting fish in a barrel, while standing on a pile of corpses as the city explodes behind you, illuminating your massive pecs.
Published 2013

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.52 out of 10)
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Apr 03

Look I maybe an alien entity of fire... But I ain't dating a girl with only four digits!Click for full image

Bibliomancer’s Art Direction:OK so you painted an awesome space fire monster, and the iron moons are cool, and you even got the starfield in the corner, but aren’t you forgetting something? Yeah, girl ass. And make it blue. She’s an alien. You think these paperbacks just sell themselves?”
Published 1971

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.42 out of 10)
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Mar 12

Is she staring at my tail again? *Sighs* My face is up here you know!Click for full image

David A Comments: I assume after losing 80% of their population over the past 100 years, tigers are finally going to get even with the human race… with the help of a sexy female sidekick, naturally.
Published 1993

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.86 out of 10)
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Feb 26

This is what happens when you press the red button on your treadmill!Click for full image

Ethan Comments: I just finished raiding my book shelf and I unearthed some truly wretched book covers.
Published 1990

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.97 out of 10)
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Nov 19

Even daemons of hellfire occasionally like to put bra's on their heads.Click for full image

Frank Comments: Now here’s one that if I were on the bus and saw someone reading it, I might try to avoid attracting his or her attention. Just not my sort of creepy I guess.
Published 1968

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.52 out of 10)
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Nov 16

I the great spirit of this bone say... ow hot hot hot hot!Click for full image

MisterBob’s Art Direction: Okay, the book is called Reindeer Moon so be sure to paint a reindeer with a Moon and if you any paint left, add a floating bone with flames.
Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.76 out of 10)
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Oct 03

Dude... that monster might have an amazing ass but you don't have to look creepy about it!Click for full image

Ian Comments: Cigar smoking bunny… what more is there to say? If only that knife had a ting!
Published 1991

Maybe breaking our joke onto the genre rule… oh well.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.72 out of 10)
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Sep 18

The Flaming Horse 2000! Offers that incentive for speed and with a great smell of bbq!Click for full image

Frank Comments: This is actually not so terrible a cover. But given that you’ve got two other covers up for this title, I thought you might enjoy this one.
Published 1985

You might remember The Door into Fire from here and here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.04 out of 10)
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Jun 11

I like how the sword looks like a continuation of his tie! Today I am proud of myself.Click for full UN-LEWIS’ED image!

Frank Comments: I’ll bet there were Others ready to help grab those!
Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.95 out of 10)
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