Apr 09
Click for full imageWell I am thinking, man in miniskirt stands in the background with a very large sword. Then we’ll have a man standing in the foreground thrusting his sword from his pelvis as he furiously… well. Lets just say he looks furious, the destroyed viewers’ minds will do the rest.
(Average: 8.57 out of 10)
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April 9th, 2010 at 9:55 am
The mohawk as symbol of badassery. Why did it ever go out of fashion? And can we bring it back?
April 9th, 2010 at 10:39 am
Well I guess. I am not sure if I am badass enough to pull it off myself. But we could just all give ourself mohawks and walk around with massive swords and leather straps. That might be dangerously close to LARPing though…
April 9th, 2010 at 2:18 pm
He’s sporting a fabulous pair of this seasons Ugg boots aswell.
Seriously though, it looks like the front guy was cut/pasted out of a nasty german porno, then the artist just painted a sword in his hands… not cool.
April 9th, 2010 at 3:52 pm
Yeah, and possibly the sword was inserted to cover up something else entirely in the original picture.
April 9th, 2010 at 9:06 pm
That’s a good cover. That is to say, it looks ludicrously gonzo and the centre figure looks to be having huge heaps of basically silly fun.
That’s a perfect description of the contents of one of Simon’s books.
(Mind you, I’m not sure *why* he looks so happy. Maybe he’s sure he’s going to defeat his barechested twin with the huge sword, or maybe they’re just going to strike stupid poses together for a photo op.)
(ew, now I’m visualizing Cameron and Brown doing this. NO NO NO)
April 9th, 2010 at 9:09 pm
Sometimes a sword is just a sword.
April 10th, 2010 at 12:23 am
Auditions for Duran Duran’s ‘Wild Boys’ video? *That way….* (25 years too late)
April 10th, 2010 at 5:28 pm
@Nix, i’d be more interested in politics if it were “an epic adventure in the tradition of Star Wars”. Brown is cast as Darth Vader, i hope he turns out to be Camerons father… Cameron will also be pretty shocked if his wife turns out to be his sister.
… they should have more space battles and laser fights in general, bring back the disinterested youth to politics.
April 10th, 2010 at 11:18 pm
Not a sword. Clearly a lava lamp.
April 12th, 2010 at 11:35 pm
Simon strikes me as a perfect commenter for this site, actually. Someone should drop him a line…
April 13th, 2010 at 8:45 am
Yea where is our Simon these days? He might be busy with something we internet people call…. real life…. 😉
April 13th, 2010 at 9:18 am
Actually, now I see you probably meant Simon Green… which would make more sense! haha
Most of his covers aren’t actually bad at all. I was surprised when we found this one.
April 19th, 2010 at 8:53 pm
Oh too funny. The husband is reading that series. LOL
April 19th, 2010 at 11:44 pm
Wolf> With that picture… maybe you need to question the hubby on what’s inside the books 😉
April 21st, 2010 at 12:52 pm
Terrible cover but an enjoyable book! The cover art depictions of Owen Deathstalker (who I guess is the subject here) were always so far away from how I imagined him. Come on, he’s an historian/aristo/reluctant heir to a warrior legacy – does that scream GUY WITH A MOHAWK AND LEATHER PANTS to you? Nah. Surely not.
April 23rd, 2010 at 5:37 pm
“Dude, Wez called. He wants his mohawk back.”
^..^
April 23rd, 2010 at 7:52 pm
The guy in the background looks like he’s thinking what I’m thinking, which is: “There is no WAY that guy ever dates my sister”
May 20th, 2010 at 8:02 am
He looks a bit constipated…
December 8th, 2010 at 11:54 am
Im of course devastated by the criticism! I considered this to be one of my finest artworks. Clearly only those of an intellectual bent would be draw to this series of novels so its astonishing that your aesthetic sensibilities are so retarded. I myself modeled for the main figure and as you can see Im a big boy. Just be careful or Ill come and whack you with my unsheathed blade!
xxx
The artist
December 8th, 2010 at 12:49 pm
And with such constructive criticism, it’s hard not to take it directly to heart!
Oh if you do turn up to whack us with your blade, can you wear the costume! I know some women who’d pay good money for that! 😉
Welcome to GSS Peter!
December 8th, 2010 at 3:16 pm
Just for the record, Peter went on to illustrate many famous film posters in the 1980’s – 90’s… but he’s still wearing that viking outfit….
December 8th, 2010 at 8:10 pm
Your, uh, unsheathed blade. Yeeees. Freud called, he wants his innuendo back.
December 12th, 2010 at 7:34 pm
Deathstalker… Try that word on for size.
“Who are you, stranger?”
“I’m Deathstalker Podznofski.”
October 28th, 2013 at 2:43 pm
This is clearly JUST LIKE Star Wars because……
…swords?
January 10th, 2016 at 8:15 pm
An epic adventure in the tradition of STAR WARS — cardboard characters, giant plot holes, sword fights that drag on forever, and dialogue that makes you cringe!
April 18th, 2021 at 5:45 am
“I see your schwartz is as big as mine.”
February 13th, 2022 at 12:05 pm
Star Wars….that is obviously a young and feisty Grand Moff Tarkin in a deleted flashback scene.