Good Show Sir

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John’s Art Direction: No, see, boss, it’s not pornographic – it’s surrealism!
Published 1970

I give this a Bruce Forsyth and a Bullseye.
Many thanks to John!

(Average: 8.85 out of 10)

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Art Direction: We’ll have the male sitting on an Ikea chair like he’s James Bond with laser guns and space ships. We’ll put him in some sort of spandex suit with knee pads and fob that off as armour. With the girl lets go for nudity but we’ll photoshop in some clothes later. What we really want is, plenty of side boob! Therefore appealing to both genders… right?
Published 2010

(Average: 8.42 out of 10)

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Eric Comments: The ironic thing about this one is that the cover depicts an actual portion of the story. Accurately. Really. It is a good book, regardless of how it’s clad.
Published 1986

Many thanks to Eric!

(Average: 2.98 out of 10)

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GK’s Art Direction: Alright, Lem asked us for a giant robot of some sort. Preferably with the ruins of a burning city in the background, perhaps people running in terror, a few puppies being crushed, you know, that sort of thing. Can you do it?
Published 1977

Artist has been listed as two people. I’m unsure which is correct.
Many thanks to GK!

(Average: 8.55 out of 10)

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George Comments: I feel as if there were drinking involved in the making of this design cover. Or drugs. Or rabies. I think this is what happens when clip art and Photoshop get used in the most horrible ways possible. EVERYTHING is horrifying in this cover. Does anything really need to be said? Just looking at this cover says it all.
Published 2009

Many thanks to George!

(Average: 8.59 out of 10)

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Radiano’s Art Direction
Editor: Okay, the title is Sleepwalker’s World…
Artist: And what you want? An alien in pajamas who walks on a starship in construction? Please!
Editor: Well, no. See, this is a story about a superman-like astronaut in a world where every night everybody but a few elect acts like zombies, and he must stop some ancient conspirator ruled by a giant bug with a baby face with the help of the sister…
Artist: Whoa whoa whoa, too much information! Listen, I’ll put a naked girl on the cover, and maybe something else about the story. Any idea?
Editor: Well, the guy is helped by a super-intelligent lycaon…
Artist: What the hell is a lycaon?
Editor: It’s an african wild dog with Mickey Mouse ears.
Artist: …
Editor: …
Artist: Uhm, lycaon… lycon… lyon… That’s it! I’ll put a lion head in the corner, Trust me, it will be FABULOUS!!!
Published 1977

I give this two Jim Bowen’s and an Ian Rush!
Thanks to Radiano!

(Average: 7.95 out of 10)

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Art Direction: Kinda like those raunchy romance book covers with real people. Expect with a magical dragon and a hunky wizard waving around his magical staff. Who wouldn’t want to sleep with a guy who dresses like a wizard? Actually… good point… make sure to hire a model.
Published 2003

(Average: 4.84 out of 10)

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Cliftopher’s Art Direction: Give me a dinosaur with a baby’s head. A freakin’ big dinosaur with a really little baby’s head. And while you’re at it put some kind of mountain like a man in the background.
Published 1982

Many thanks to Cliftopher!

(Average: 8.22 out of 10)

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Ashton Comments: Usually when there’s a naked woman on the front of a book it’s to titillate the viewer, but this brave artist went against convention and made the most unappealing cover he could think of.
Published 1989

Many thanks to Ashton!

(Average: 8.16 out of 10)

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Stevie Comments: Samuel Delaney’s Neveryona is so-over-the-top hetero soft porn. And the lead character is supposedly gay! What a bubble butt he’s got! I wish I had one of those! And what’s he doing with that giant sword, anyway?
Published 1983

Amazing! Many thanks to Stevie!

(Average: 7.90 out of 10)

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