Mar 19
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Colette’s Art Direction: We need to convey a Utopian future, so nothing represents that better than a pastel circuit-board Lego city with buildings encased in test tubes. Add a happy gorilla-headed torso man carrying a life-like unitard-wearing sex doll. Ooh, and lasers! And… and shoulder pads!
Published 1982

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Tagged with: anthropomorphism • ape people • Avon Books • damsel • dude • font problems • frickin laser beams • Haircut 100 • robots • shoulder pads • Stanislaw Fernandes • Stanislaw Lem • Ting! • trapezoid head • white-clothed protagonist • WTF
Mar 15
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Frank Comments: In this one, we know which character on the cover is referred to by the title, because he’s the one grabbing the active element on his weapon. The mannequins would never do such a thing.
Published 1980

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Tagged with: awesome foursome • beard-wielding • bladed weapons • capes • damsel • dude • glow • Jim Hawkings • Mariano • planets • Popular Library • space • sword • Ting!
Feb 20
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Diggler’s Art Direction: What we need is a man in a hot tub doing some New Wave Impressionistic dance moves for his girlfriend on the video phone. Meanwhile we’ll have him being squirted by red dye for artistic effect… What do you think?
Published 1982

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Tagged with: damsel • dude • jazz hands • Larry Niven • lens flare • muscles • once you see it • Orbit Books • Peter Jones • space • starkers • Ting! • WTF
Feb 07
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Joachim Comments:Man with heavy mascara, in a purple cloud, with a star, sparkling, under his eye…. Is paradise a purple cloud?
Published 1971

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Tagged with: dude • Michael Elder • Pinnacle Books • Ting! • Unknown Artist Institute • WTF
Dec 19
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Art Direction: Wave… WAVE!?! Well there you go my boy, we have our answer right there. Let’s put a huge wave on there with a lighthouse and a helicopter to try and show some size perspective. I’m sure it will be all fine. And it’s day time so lens flare the hell out of that lighthouse. They run during the day right?
Published 2010

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Tagged with: font problems • helicopters • lens flare • lighthouse • once you see it • tidal wave • Ting! • Tor Books • Unknown Artist Institute • Wil Mara • WTF
Dec 09
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Jami Comments: Me giant floating head and shoulders of Demolished Man. Me crush tiny stereotypical Hammer film type female vampire and tiny floating head version of me. Then me play with all the pretty animals and the tiny naked women. Tiny clothed men can get moon dust out of my giant ear. Me have glowy thing above knuckle. Me love glowy thing.
Published 1978
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Click for previous Demolished Man cover here

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Tagged with: Alfred Bester • capes • Cats! • damsel • dude • floating head • giraffes • Jerome Podwil • leopard • monkeys • moon • planets • Pocket Books • space • starkers • strange creature • sun • Ting! • zebras
Nov 28
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Elijah Comments: When you think Omnipotent Star-Being that has ascended to the highest level of consciousness, what do you see? Spandex.
Published 1992

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Tagged with: Ace Books • cleavage • damsel • floating person • font problems • Jeanne Robinson • Michael Herring • space • Spider Robinson • Ting!
Nov 21
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Tom Noir Comments: It’s the little details that separate the good artists from the bad. For instance, notice the bit of man-bun sticking out from under this fellow’s fuzzy tutu. GENIUS!
Published 1984

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Tagged with: Crown Publishers • damsel • dude • forest • fungi • furs • George Zebrowski • hunkbutt • Isaac Asimov • loincloth • long haired men • male skirts • Michael Booth • mighty moustache • monsters • Murray Leinster • pole weapons • spear • spider • starkers • strange creature • Ting! • WTF
Nov 04
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Man of the Mountian’s Art Direction:So, the story is about a girl trapped in the middle of the black death in midevial England, while everyone back in her time are dying of a flu epidemic. Give us a nice upbeat cover, otherwise nobody is going to buy this!
Published 1993

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Tagged with: bad science • Bantam Books • Connie Willis • damsel • dude • headband • horses • horses with hairstyles • once you see it • Roger Kastel • SCIENCE! • shuriken of approval • Ting!
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