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Jun 02

Like the great aurora borealis, the eternity brigade neon sign sweeps the sky.Click for full image

Lauren Comments: The colors on this are just so awful. And spike heels? But at least she’s not in a fur bikini. Although he appears to be having some wardrobe malfunction with his shirt.

At least he doesn’t have a mullet!
Thanks to Lauren!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.37 out of 10)
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Jun 01

His head is always in the clouds.Click for full image

Phil’s Art Direction: We don’t want people thinking he’s odd just because he’s tall and thin, so let’s have someone else tall and thin in the background. Then give him really odd hair.

Many thanks to Phil!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 9.04 out of 10)
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May 28

Ah May! How I love you with two bank holidays in one month and the final one falling on, my birthday. That’s right exciting stuff! So here to celebrate is a strange random collection of honourable mentions. And they are a random collection I assure you.

These covers break our well kept and hard hitting rules. There are some who even complain they are almost too hard. But these covers are generally excluded because they are part of a franchise or comedy.

Again thanks to everyone who visits the site and those who are submitting covers. Some of them are simply amazing, we’ll get to them eventually. Enjoy these great covers and to those who gain from it, have an amazing extended weekend!

As a bonus check out a vague picture of CSA (known in certain circles as ‘The Troll’)
Trolling through books to help me find covers at Christmas

Everything is in proportion. EVERYTHING!Click for full image

Dealing with the hard topic of zombies before the craze of 2009.Click for full image

Does that princess have the hots for that dragon? ewww.Click for full image

Shatner is comedy, right?Click for full image

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.90 out of 10)
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May 27

I don't need clothes when I have a team of cat people to surround my modesty.Click for full image

Johannah’s Art Direction: Okay, two words: Cat People! Yes, again. But this time we’ll have five of them surrounding a naked guy with a mustache. The one in front will be pointing a gun and the one next to him will be holding a futuristic mobile communication device. And let’s throw in a few of those aliens from the Mos Eisley Cantina for good measure. What’s that sound? Are you crying? Look, those art school loans aren’t going to pay themselves off. Just get painting already.

Awesome cover, excellent rug!
Thanks to Johannah!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.07 out of 10)
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May 26

It's too early. My mind can't make sense of anything on this thing.Click for full image

David Comments: I haven’t read this, so for all I know, centaurs and one-eyed jellyfish are essential to the plot. The S in JONES was cut off by the printer, not by me – it wraps round the edge of the cover (this is a hardback). The scan makes the colours look a bit more lurid than they really are. Published by Victor Gollancz, 1970

Another Heinlien! I’m flooded with them.
Thanks very much to David!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.51 out of 10)
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May 25

Of all the weird things around us to attack... you choose the tree?!?Click for full image

Jen Comments: A warlock and his robotic horse battle a carnivorous tree who collects stuffed animals and leprechauns, while farting evil smoke into the mouth of a nearby menacing castle. Meanwhile, a knight and his lady ride past, oblivious. Sadly, a surprisingly accurate depiction of the book. And yes, I paid $5 for it.

Insane thanks to Jen!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.60 out of 10)
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May 24

Out for his morning stroll, John waves to some passers by.Click for full image

Hex Comments: There’s really not much I can say about this one, except that _someone_ in the design process for this book was taking the piss.

Thanks to Hex!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.93 out of 10)
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May 21

SENTAUR KAT IZ WATCHIN U MASTURBATE.Click for full image

Jessie Comments: This cover is so atrocious that every time I go to read it, I just can’t. It’s definitely among the top three worst covers I’ve ever seen.
Published 1995

That is epic. Simply epic! Thanks to Jessie!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.93 out of 10)
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May 20

What is it with women flying around on objects in the midst of pleasure?Click for full image

Bookworm Bas Comments: A 1978 PAN edition. I like the play on words with the title submitting ‘sex’ for ‘things’ in reference to H.G.Wells. I also like the artwork. After all who doesn’t like naked women? No relation to any of the stories of course. At least I don’t recall any flying platform jetting away from a mountain range while a nude women, her decency protected only by her exceptionally long brunette hair, is overcome with emotion. Still I bet they sold a few and I reckon the hair extensions were painted in later (which is a shame I think).

Not bad short stories Anne McCaffrey and Hilary Bailey in there as well to represent women. But also John Sladek, A.K.Jorgensson, Thomas Disch and Douglas Hill in addition to those on the front cover.
Epic! Thanks to Bookworm Bas!
Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.39 out of 10)
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May 19

Crap you got the southern judge, he hates windows.Click for full image

Sarah Comments: I love everything about this. The floating COM-PU-TOR in the witness chair. The fact that in the FU-TAR we still have traditional, human-run courts. The mobbed-up, dark-glasses wearing judge. The spider web.

I wish every computer looked like that! Many thanks to Sarah!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.25 out of 10)
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