Good Show Sir

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Rachel J Comments: No, my tagline is not stolen, and yes, my hair does have a life of its own. Now excuse me while I attack forty lens flares, a doorway, a glowing mist and a block of high-rise flats with my trusty katana.
Published 2011

(Average: 5.20 out of 10)

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Joachim’s Art Direction: One-eyed sex runts. No other words are necessary….
Published 1970

(Average: 8.32 out of 10)

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Alessandra Comments: This is one of those subtly wrong covers. What’s up with the faces? And looking closer, the anatomy. His eyes are oddly round and oddly placed, a little too close together and a little too skewed to our right. Her right eye (on our left) is too low, giving her an odd one-eyed (or in the right light, three-eyed) look. Not a cover that screams its wrongness, but still eye-watering when you look closely.
Published 1983

(Average: 5.73 out of 10)

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Jaouad Comments: I have no mouth, but I have a double chin & a sousaphone ear with tiny people creeping out of it & a plum floating above my eye & something which looks vaguely like a grape in my other eye & two tiny legs and and… I MUST SCREAM!
Published 1974

(Average: 8.26 out of 10)

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Max Comments: I read the paperback version of this back in the day and it had a nice cover which represented the content of the book quite well. This original hardback, on the other hand, has none of those things. It’s a barbarian and perhaps an elf-woman on thrones, in hell, staring into a satanic-goat-festooned portal to THE COSMOS. The back’s got some crystal pyramids on it.
Published 1988

(Average: 6.22 out of 10)

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GK Comments: As we all know, cats love eggs and shellfish.
Published 1989

(Average: 6.58 out of 10)

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Elijah Comments: Nothing says, “stirring look at spirituality and the uncertainty of agnosticism” like a badly-drawn cowboy running from a volcano.
Published 1998

(Average: 6.41 out of 10)

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MisterBob’s Art Direction: Are there any flowers on Jupiter? Bet they look alien, paint one with the planet behind.
Published 1979

(Average: 7.24 out of 10)

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Tom Noir’s Art Direction:
“Scotty, we need more clip-art!”

“She can’t take much more captain! We push her any harder and we risk a font overload!”

“Dammit, just do it man!”
Published 1999

(Average: 8.58 out of 10)

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Colette’s Art Direction: I want an attractive couple on another planet who wear ribbons instead of actual clothing. But I guess we need something that will make it seem horrible AND sexy, so can you add a long trail of golden ectoplasm to the woman’s lower body? It should imply “you have radiant womb” and not “you should immediately see a doctor about that.”
Published 1973

(Average: 7.39 out of 10)

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