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Nov 14

1995 computers will always look futuristic!Click for larger image

Ralph E. Comments: Don’t you hate when time-traveling grandma catches you downloading porn.

Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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Jan 20

Carl Sagan flips out!Click for larger image

Maude Comments: The upside-down eye sees all!

You might remember this from here.

Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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Jan 03

Twenty Twenty Two. Here for you!

As we continue with another chapter in our Journal of the Plague Year, we look back fondly at the only bright side of another dreary annus horribilis: our parade of terrible covers!

The highest-rated cover of 2021 is:

This cover blowsClick for larger image

Macht Stahlratte zum Präsidenten!

Macht Stahlratte zum Präsidenten!

Our silver medal winner:

By His Boot-StirrupsClick for larger image

Le livre d’or: Robert Heinlein

Le livre d’or: Robert Heinlein

And the bronze medal winning:

Obviously photoshoppedClick for larger image

Time Storm

Time Storm

Tag Wizard channels his inner shaman with this howler:

Fur and Loathing in Las VegasClick for larger image

Fur Magic

Fur Magic

And my favourite cover for the classic feel-good novel:

Tune in to see who will win on this week's episode of 'Big Brother'Click for larger image

Nineteen Eighty-Four

Nineteen Eighty-Four

Now back to managing my Xinjiang Dogecoin mine. I leave you the task of retaining what’s left of your sanity in 2022. Feel free to tag your favourites in the comments below!
— GSS Admin

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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Dec 15

Bladder Attack!Click for larger image

Jonathan Comments: Planet of the Gum Shoes vs Attack of the Giant Kinder Egg.

Published 1971

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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Apr 22

Soon to be a major motion picture!Click for larger image

Tag Wizard Comments: I warned you. They only get worse.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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Nov 10

Everyone else is wearing leggings here! Why can't hawks do it? eh!?Click for full image

Tam W’s Art Direction: This is a great work of fantasy, so naturally we want it to look as retro, cliched and formulaic as possible. I’m talking men in tights! If you do decide to depict a wizard turning into a bird, don’t forget to catch him in the act. And make it man-sized, never mind what the novel says!
Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.74 out of 10)
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Jan 13

Click for full image

Stevie Comments: Robert Silverberg’s Recalled to Life has to be the classic tentacle-sex cover drama. Why is the guy naked and floating in a huge vat of octopus to begin with? Wow!
Published 1977

Many thanks to Stevie!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.74 out of 10)
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Sep 04

You're going to enjoy this sunset with me... like it or not!!Click for full image

Alright... I'll go to lightspeed in a minute. Just let me finish this game of solitaire first.Click for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: In the future everyone will wear soft, velour sweat-suits and spaceships will be controlled by recycled 1998 iMacs.
Both Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.74 out of 10)
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Nov 22

GAH! It's a killer cranberry!Click for full image

Phil’s Art Direction: I’m CERTAIN people will buy this. If it was good enough for Hugo Gernsback, it’s good enough for me.
Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.74 out of 10)
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Aug 24

Whatever happened to the shoulder pad... It used to be sci-fi's champion!Click for full image

Art Direction: We’ll have some guy looking like he’s in a furtistic space disco being attacked by a giant man with a glowing forehead. Why, you ask? Well, we all know psychic powers are clearly symbolised by a lens flare. Just like every sword is reflecting a magical light from somewhere making it go… TING!
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.74 out of 10)
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