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Feb 05

Stop complaining! I only have a shovel to defend myself...Click for full image

You know what a book cover can never have enough of? That’s right chum, text. Lets fire as much on there as possible. And possibly some worm creature being attacked by guys with guns. But that’s secondary, no in fact it’s tertiary, to the fonts with their various marvelous colours and shapes.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.97 out of 10)
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Jan 28

Even gods lack adequate chest support!Click for full image

Ok! What would gods normally do, while inhabiting the body of a busty half naked women? Hmmm, how about standing by a sweet tower glowing oddly, on all fours in front of some sort of cat creature and swinging a sword about to decapitate a snake. Gods are all about the sexual innuendo! Yeaaaaahhhhaaa!

Thanks to David D!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.96 out of 10)
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Jan 15

Phhhooowwwa!! Someone's been eating garlic!Click for full image

There’s only one thing in this world that can make a muscle infused man in a loincloth and his scantily clad female faint almost instantly. A naked red headed minotaur who is sneezing at them. Just remember, the sure fire way to success, keep the clothes to a minimum!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.83 out of 10)
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Dec 10

Bring that body to me muahahahahah, and some berries mmm MMM!Click for full image

So this is the cover I came up with, what do you think? Tim? Paul? Guys? Did you like the inclusion of the berries, the half skull, and subtle heart monitoring line? The large glowing atom in a circle on the dudes head? I’ll take your silence as a yes.

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.14 out of 10)
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Dec 08

Well Tim here you go... this is one messed up fetish.Click for full image

You know what I love when admiring the female form. If only they’d put on a robe, a death mask and pick up a scythe. Man, if we draw a women like that. Why are you looking at me like that guys? Don’t tell me you’ve never thought of it before. No? Really? Oh.

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.87 out of 10)
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Nov 30

God, why did I shave my armpits?Click for full image

I’ve heard on the grapevine that science fiction slash fantasy readers only want one thing. Naked women! What’s with that, eh? What we need are dudes. The type that make you feel really uncomfortable. No mention of fantasy or anything. Just a dude and… The Quest!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.82 out of 10)
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Nov 24

Up yours! I may be a wolfman but at least my legs don't have squiggles!Click for full image

You know the two things that make everything look fantastic? Glow and blur. The best photoshop tools money can buy. So we’ll have a glowing blurry tattooed man with a wolves head! And some girl with some glowly blurry transparency around her. Make sure the title is huge and don’t forget to blur what you can.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.70 out of 10)
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Nov 23

So, would you like to get dinner? ....why are you running away? Oh right, forgot I had a sword with me.Click for full image

OH OH OH! Let’s have a half naked man grasping his magic electrified sword around waist height. That sounds suggestive? Of course it is, he’s holding a sword right next to his baby maker. A ha ha ha. Don’t forget to overload the whole cover with text, a lot of text, in all shapes and sizes.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.90 out of 10)
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Nov 20

This gaming centre is dead. Only two dragons playing today.Click for full image

You know what you thought? You thought, you’d seen everything anyone could possibly do with a dragon. Well, you’re wrong. Three words for you to eat today, ‘Dragons In Space’! Oh yes, and trying to decipher the controls of a space ship! I mean, dragons can read, right?

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.94 out of 10)
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Nov 17

And I thought having three horns coming out of my cranium would put women off!Click for full image

We all know what men want. Hunky muscles and tight underwear. No? Uh, strange stone monoliths? No? Leopard skin capes. No? Three horns coming out of his skull? What, seriously, no? Alright, have them all, but add two naked women caressing him. Classy eh? Actually, don’t answer me this time.

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.81 out of 10)
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