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Aug 24

Another long weekend to celebrate the UK’s closing of banks! That can only mean one thing here at Good Show Sir… Honourable Mentions! Today we have a nice selection of franchise books that would be otherwise excluded by our iron forged rules.

Hope you enjoy these, I’ve even thrown in a special something at the end. Enjoy your long weekend if you get it and remember, books rule! Support your local bookery.

Screw this... I'm off to where my jacket isn't ripped!Click for full image

No...NOOOO get me away from that title font! NOOO!!Click for full image

Let's slay this dragon my friends... with the methods of performance art!Click for full image

NO no, I said use stealth... not stand out in the open glowing with energy!Click for full image

Bonus CD Cover!! Badly photoshopped accordion player:

Yep, that's where you should play the accordion... away from society!Click for full image

 

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.81 out of 10)
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Jul 16

All power to the magic dishwasher tab!!Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: Floating jewels, wise animals, introspective young teenagers…. need I say more?
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.24 out of 10)
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Jul 03

Some girls want ponies... others want orc armies!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Boarders and frames are the window to one’s soul my friend! Just make sure this soul has a perm and a great pair of… candles… ah ha ha ha. Of course I really mean boobs.
Published 1989

P.S. I’ll hopefully have the ratings working again later today!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.38 out of 10)
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May 11

Quickly! I've forgotten my trousers and all I have to cover myself is your Mum's curtain!Click for full image

GK Comments: When I saw this at the book store all I could say was, “Good Show, Sir!”
Published 1999

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.75 out of 10)
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Apr 20

Norton: Loving the cats well before the intermawebs!Click for full image

GK Comments: As we all know, cats love eggs and shellfish.
Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.98 out of 10)
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Mar 13

PHOAWWWW would you look at those.... uh.. shrubberies!Click for full image

MisterBob’s Art Direction: A priestess with a nice cleavage and a giant bong. Don’t forget the big alien cat (blue with orange spots!)
Published 1985

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.10 out of 10)
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Mar 12

AHHHH!!!! WHy did I learn magic... WHY?!!?Click for full image

Scott Comments: This little piggy levitated glowing hourglasses, this little piggy immolated itself, this little piggy performed a Satanic ritual and was possessed by a demon…
Published 1982

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.74 out of 10)
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Mar 02

Who let all those cats into the steam room!Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: One for the ladies?
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.61 out of 10)
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Feb 10

Crystal answer me... why did I buy such a big dish washer?Click for full image

Rachel J’s Art Direction: Mark, *nothing* happens in this yawn-fest, so let’s go with the general girl-power-in-space-with-crystals theme from the earlier books. Pink-and-purple colour scheme, huge embossed title in neon yellow, rocketships, chick in the foreground holding up a sparkly rainbow crystal. Oh, and make her look awed. What? No, I said “awed”, not “bored!” But hey, “bored” works too.
Published 1993

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.91 out of 10)
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Jan 04

Happy New Year!

Well another year is here, I am just about over my hang over and of course back in work! So it’s time to start again and see what exciting covers we can find to brighten our days. Last year didn’t see a cover which had the power to beat, I Sing the Body Electric. But maybe this year… maybe…

Thanks to everyone who has sent in covers and comments! You all bring such entertainment to our lives. And of course thank you to all those amazing publishers, without you and your art direction where would Good Show Sir be?

Last year was very exciting now that I think about it. And my quest for terrible Sci-Fi/fantasy book covers also led to the best conversation ever in a second hand book store.

Shop Assistant: Wow.. that cover is so bad!!!
Me: Yeah isn’t it? That’s kinda why I am buying it actually.
Shop Assistant: Really? Awesome. You should start some sort of website to show covers like these.
Me: I have…
Shop Assistant: ……
And nothing more was said. Here is the book I bought.

The top rated cover of the year:

Bum chins are well known for invading the rest of your face.Click for original post

A Personal Favourite:

The dangers of eating radioactive fish.Click for original post

CSA Chooses dragon crotch!

Carry On films did get a bit... odd...Click for original post

And of course, how could we not mention the cover that started a censoring legend:

I know space ships don't need to be aerodynamic but...Click for original post

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.00 out of 10)
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