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Dec 07

Man Plus

11 Comments »

Man plus almonds equals...uh...Click for slightly larger image

Phil Comments: Almonds for eyes – check. Visible inner organs – check. Bionic limbs – check.
Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.59 out of 10)
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Dec 06

Dry Skull Dreams

17 Comments »

GHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH!!! I can't see what I'm holding!!!Click for full image

Frank Comments: Just in case the title and its placement aren’t edgy enough, it’s backed up by cover art that should push it over the edge into WTF.
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.84 out of 10)
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Dec 05

War for the Oaks

18 Comments »

I've really got to stop coming on these internet dating sites...Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: What if William Morris painted Fantasy covers?
Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.49 out of 10)
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Dec 04

Knot Gneiss

22 Comments »

You know... you guys could help instead of barely pulling, riding your purple unicorn or even.. STANDING... on it!!Click for full image

GK Comments: Room for another unicorn somewhere?
Published 2010

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.49 out of 10)
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Nov 29

Venus Development

19 Comments »

It's cold on Venus today... those mountains are awfully perky.Click for full UNSHEEPED & UNLEWISED image

Ian Comments: No one will notice the nude lady disguised as hills and valleys. Bound to get more sales that way.
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.36 out of 10)
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Nov 27

The Hollow Earth

19 Comments »

There is nothing more manly than travelling like this... MIKE... did you bring your dog?!?Click for slightly larger image

Joachim Comments: Oh boy. Too many unusual creatures but I’ll give it a try… Shirtless man holding a puppy prancing across the planet with a flock of “birds”, on the back of a cockroach-like yoda-eared pig, escaping from laser beam shooting luminescent cilia-clad levitating mollusks…?
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.55 out of 10)
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Nov 20

At the Mountains of Madness and Other Weird Tales

23 Comments »

Little did the world know... Rathrogaletech the Violator actually wanted to learn funk bass.Click for full image

Rusty’s Art Direction: Lovecraft, huh? In that case, of course we’ll have to slap a clarinetist on the cover. But that’s not very striking, is it? So give him more fingersyeahhe’s a hardcore monster clarinetist. Yeahand knuckleslots of knuckles. Put in more knuckles, just stuff those hands full of knuckles. Make them have more knuckles than fingers! Yeah, yeah, that’s it. And his body and neck, even his lips! MORE KNUCKLES! MORE KNUCKLES! MORE MORE MORE!!!……oh yeeeaaaaaaah…..that there is beauty!
Published 2009

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 1.87 out of 10)
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Nov 19

The Playboy Book of Science Fiction and Fantasy

24 Comments »

Even daemons of hellfire occasionally like to put bra's on their heads.Click for full image

Frank Comments: Now here’s one that if I were on the bus and saw someone reading it, I might try to avoid attracting his or her attention. Just not my sort of creepy I guess.
Published 1968

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.52 out of 10)
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Nov 15

Tintagel

30 Comments »

Welcome... Oh... I see you brought Bob Dylan with you...Click for full image

Paul H Cook Comments: This is the cover to my first novel. It didn’t sell well. My editor/publisher blamed me, of course. This looks like a Harlequin romance. Even I wouldn’t have purchased this book.
Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.96 out of 10)
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Nov 12

Collision Course

16 Comments »

I concur Doctor Alien Face Space Ship...Click for full image

Kim Comments: Don’t even know where to start.
Published 1977

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.63 out of 10)
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