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Jul 11

Manalacor of Veltakin

38 Comments »

Great! I hate unoriginal novels...Click for full image

Frank Comments: I’m wondering how long the artist made the lady hold that pose, and whether she got sunburn.
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.53 out of 10)
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Jul 03

Meanwhile

28 Comments »

Followed by the sequel... Anyway... Click for full image

David A Comments: Blonde in a bikini? Check! Sex god in thong armour? Check! Aliens? Check! Castle? Check! Erupting volcano? Check! But oh, wait, what’s that say on the front? Fully illustrated??
Published 1979

Click here for a gallery of the (NSFW) interior artwork (including a naked sea lion/woman hybrid with a baby!)

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.25 out of 10)
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Jun 10

The Sheep Look Up

36 Comments »

Unlike dogs... who can't look up... Click for full image

Frank’s Art Direction: Well, the title’s about sheep, and the story’s clearly about a near future where the air is very polluted. What can you do with that?
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.31 out of 10)
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Apr 23

Warsprite

31 Comments »

Sir, why did you give the war robot high heels? Storming the beaches tomorrow will be interesting...Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: The dame walked into my office wearing nothing but a pair of high heels and a V2 rocket. The expression on her face said she was about to go ballistic.
Published 1990

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.04 out of 10)
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Apr 05

Space Ship X.S.22

24 Comments »

Unbelievably this came before The Machine Gunners by Robert Westhall! Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Space Ship X.S.22… that’s what this old boy is called? Well I don’t think we should have a space ship or in fact anything resembling anything sci-fi on there. That’s what they’d be expecting us to do. Just put a couple of boys carrying a machine gun while another gets chased by a bull!
Published 1966

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.04 out of 10)
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Feb 18

The Nowhere Hunt

28 Comments »

Stranded on a alien planet... Janet expressed herself the only way she knew how... through interpretative dance!Click for full image

MisterBob’s Art Direction: Boobs? Don’t be silly, bums are in. And use up that orange paint.
Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.65 out of 10)
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Nov 15

Tintagel

30 Comments »

Welcome... Oh... I see you brought Bob Dylan with you...Click for full image

Paul H Cook Comments: This is the cover to my first novel. It didn’t sell well. My editor/publisher blamed me, of course. This looks like a Harlequin romance. Even I wouldn’t have purchased this book.
Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.96 out of 10)
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Oct 11

Brain Damage

21 Comments »

I think NYC needs to think about what it spends its tourism budget on.Click for full image

Gavin Comments: A crap looking Marlon Brando inexplicably appears in the New York skyline.
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.29 out of 10)
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Aug 17

Take Back Plenty

40 Comments »

Gwad... I should have just stuck with having the bird...No larger image available

Binky Commnets: She only wished she had to deal with a backseat driver.
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.04 out of 10)
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Jun 13

Conscience Interplanetary

17 Comments »

I.. space god... give this to you to lead the way. My pet wiggles!Click for full image

Saxy Stevenson’s Art Direction: It’s about an alien, a cute one, you know the kind of one you’d love to kiss, cuddle, stroke, bath etc. Bath… wait that’s a great idea, like with bubbles and maybe some caring hands around it and some big gremlin eyes. Perfect!
Published 1974

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.94 out of 10)
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