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Apr 01

Face it John, you can't draw trees!

Click for full image

WEELLL!! How about a guy in a space ship pointing at some futuristic map. Hmmm, yeah, you are right, it’s just not sci-fi enough! How about putting in someone with a straight bowl hair cut, and a huge werewolf creature with botox lips?!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.57 out of 10)
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Jul 20

Death Rides a Pale WhoreClick for larger image

Max Bathroom Comments: The Uber of the Red Death

Published 1977

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 3.33 out of 10)
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Sep 09

Bed, Bath and Beyond ArkhamClick for larger image

B. Chiclitz comments: Believing that he is featured prominently on the cover, Bokrug demands a copy of the new VOLUME that came to Sarnath!

Published 2019

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 2.33 out of 10)
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Jul 13

Who knew... Keith makes such a good boat!Click for full image

JaunPaul Comments: The cloud is Piers Anthony, perving over his naked under-aged protagonists.
Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.13 out of 10)
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Aug 28

Ewwww... just look at them. I don't even know why you invite them over for dinner in the first place.Click for full image

Scott B Comments: Creepy eyeballs! (Also, broccoli hair.)
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.15 out of 10)
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Aug 12

I'm afraid I just blue myself. Click for full image

Perry Comments: My second mouse-related submission!
Published 1996

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.60 out of 10)
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May 06

Ah, I see you went for something practical to hunt dragons in. Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Dragons probably prefer blondes because their four-inch Pradas make them easier to catch.
Published 2009

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.46 out of 10)
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Feb 04

Squids love women.... thankfully Space Sheep helps protect our innocent minds!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Hakan’s Art Direction: OK, we’re printing the translation of The Pebble in the Sky by Prof. Asimov. I’m open to suggestions for the cover… Come on people! The story happens in a planet, so let’s have the Earth in the background, did you see the last episode of the Galactica? Let’s put that in the title! And some women! NAKED women! And some squid! NO! MAKE THAT A SPACE SQUID! GOLDEN! So, the title we’re using is now “Sinister Planet Galactica,” it suits better, the book has no pebbles in it but has a planet so there you go. Now I want the whole lot on my desk by tomorrow or bad things will happen to you, Sir!
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.83 out of 10)
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Dec 06

The universe's most elaborate chastity belt. Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments:That key unlocks WHAT now??
Published 1993 or 1996

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.88 out of 10)
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Jun 25

Laser tag... still popular in the time for dragons...Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: As the Good Book sayeth, there is a time for dragons and a time for laser-wielding cybernetic space dragons.
Published 1989

48 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 1048 votes, average: 7.71 out of 10 (Average: 7.71 out of 10, rated)
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