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Feb 14

An Earth Man on Venus

50 Comments »

Darling, I understand why you are killing giant mutant ants... but why did you have to strip down to your underwear to do it?Click for full image

Frank Comments: Another work re-issued with new title and new cover. There was a previous publication of it as “The Radio Man” in 1924.
Published 1950

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.08 out of 10)
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Feb 13

Bloodstone

19 Comments »

Watch out human girl! For years I have been trained to rip that cat suit... in all the right places!!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: This… defies convention my friend. That damsel’s clothes aren’t even ripped or even showing any impressive cleavage! But not to worry, we can save this… just wait till you see the font I picked out. No one will notice your partially shaved alien bear sharp toothed no horned minotaur monster… I think…
Published 1994

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.35 out of 10)
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Jan 16

Virgin Planet

32 Comments »

Have you been riding around on that all day? Ewww... I'll just walk thanks... or... will I... Yes... yes I will!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

David’s Art Direction: I was up late last night and I’m getting tired, just draw me an alien ostrich on E and a beautiful naked woman. … What do you mean that’s gratuitous? Oh alright, I need sleep, give her a bra then—BUT NO PANTIES!
Published 1977

You might remember this from here.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.51 out of 10)
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Jan 14

Tower to the Sky

21 Comments »

Sorry... The toilet is on the 3rd floor. Not the 45,0000th. Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: OK, a tower from earth goes all the way to the stars, but the spaceman doing the fonts has fallen off the top.
Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.22 out of 10)
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Jan 11

Stealing the Elf-King’s Roses

26 Comments »

Ok so you have the magical one... did you really need to get into the rose bush though?Click for full image

Frank Comments: I suppose I can understand how this got sorted in with the romance paperbacks, just from the color. But this is why I look through theromance paperbacks, so I can rescue the books that need it and put them over in the SF&F section.
Published 2002

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.45 out of 10)
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Jan 07

City Under the Sea

29 Comments »

It's that moment... when you realise you are the single most awesome person on the planet... and... you are riding a shark!Click for full image

Scott B Comments: So we have a glowing underwater shark-riding, um, zombie Roman legionnaire? At least I assume he’s been zombified, or something. That’s a real death-stare he’s got going on there. Maybe he forgot he can’t actually breathe underwater?
Published 1980

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.46 out of 10)
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Jan 01

Old Year Sum Up 2012

17 Comments »

Happy New Year!

And so the world has spun, strutted and wobbled its way around the sun yet again! We’ve come through ruff storms, predictions of the end of the world and a lot of superhero movies. This leaves us though with one eternal question, will anyone find a cover to top I Sing The Body Electric!?! It certainly doesn’t look like it! But who knows, who knows eh? I am sure the year ahead will be full of wondrous treasures!

Thanks to everyone for sending in all the covers we’ve posted over the year! And thanks to everyone who leaves a comment. Oh they do make me laugh! Ah ha ha ha ha… ha!

The top rated cover of the year:

She may of had three bottoms and lived in a severed foot. But she would never date something with a Mohawk!Click for original post

A personal favourite:

Back in my day it wasn't considered a night out unless you woke up half buried in a field surrounded by mangoes!Click for original post

CSA Chooses Lizard shield attack:

Ah John... you realise... you're not actually hitting the lizard!Click for original post

And finally, just for the double triple Ting!

Most men have horses... I have a... mmm... scaly chicken thing... yeah... WOOO!Click for original post

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.53 out of 10)
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Dec 18

Dragons on the Town

14 Comments »

I say, Dragon Watson, I do believe I have found a clue! Boobs!Click for full image

Durbin Comments: In a shocking development, skateboards actually happen in this novel. And there is, in fact, an elf inspiration for Sherlock Holmes. And a brief part of the novel occurs in New York City! But otherwise, the cover gives a completely misleading impression of the contents.
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.53 out of 10)
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Dec 13

The Spoils of War

36 Comments »

Ok lets do this gun fight. Everyone got your... ah who am I kidding. Crane... you are screwed!Click for full image

Marmontoast Comments: Evidently, there really is a bird-like entity in the novel, deciding humanity’s fate. If only it could answer its mobile phone!
Published 1994

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.15 out of 10)
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Dec 11

Honeymoon in Hell

20 Comments »

Come on, shake your body baby, do the conga - Wooo take that 15th Century Artist!Click for full image

Scott B Comments: Sure the cross-eyed owl and cherry-shaking duo being eaten by a giant flower seems bizarre, but the back cover explains that it’s a Bosch painting (so intellectual!) and it’s a better portrayal of the author’s work than any modern artist could make (so they don’t have to pay anybody for a cover!). The back cover also DARES YOU (in type so large they can’t fit a four-letter word on there) to, I don’t know, have acid flashbacks or something. Not that you should do that! But read this book, because the author did that. Or something.
Published 1958

Back Cover Here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.28 out of 10)
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