Feb 10
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You know what’s on the way back in terms of being considered manly? Pink! That’s right. So we’ll have a lot of it. And on top of that epic dose of man we’ll add more layers of manliness. A crewcut, a crossbow and most importantly a stomach wound. That’s one large slice of man-cake for your eyes.
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Tagged with: crossbow • dude • Joel Rosenberg • Metzada series • planets • space ships • Unknown Artist Institute • unknown publisher • war • wounds
Feb 05
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You know what a book cover can never have enough of? That’s right chum, text. Lets fire as much on there as possible. And possibly some worm creature being attacked by guys with guns. But that’s secondary, no in fact it’s tertiary, to the fonts with their various marvelous colours and shapes.
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Tagged with: Ace Books • aliens • Dream Park series • font problems • gun • Larry Niven • once you see it • space ships • Steven Barnes • Unknown Artist Institute • WTF
Jan 28
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Ok! What would gods normally do, while inhabiting the body of a busty half naked women? Hmmm, how about standing by a sweet tower glowing oddly, on all fours in front of some sort of cat creature and swinging a sword about to decapitate a snake. Gods are all about the sexual innuendo! Yeaaaaahhhhaaa!
Thanks to David D!
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Tagged with: +1 Protection from Spelling • bird • cleavage • damsel • glow • J.R. Mitchell • lizards • magic • Unknown Artist Institute • unknown publisher • WTF
Jan 15
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There’s only one thing in this world that can make a muscle infused man in a loincloth and his scantily clad female faint almost instantly. A naked red headed minotaur who is sneezing at them. Just remember, the sure fire way to success, keep the clothes to a minimum!
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Tagged with: bladed weapons • busy hands • cleavage • damsel • dude • inadequate armor • loincloth • Mayflower Books • minotaur • muscles • Thomas Burnett Swann • Unknown Artist Institute
Dec 10
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So this is the cover I came up with, what do you think? Tim? Paul? Guys? Did you like the inclusion of the berries, the half skull, and subtle heart monitoring line? The large glowing atom in a circle on the dudes head? I’ll take your silence as a yes.
Thanks to CSA!
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Tagged with: bad science • Kenneth Kay • Marshall Goldberg M.D. • skeletons • syringe • Tower books • Unknown Artist Institute
Dec 08
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You know what I love when admiring the female form. If only they’d put on a robe, a death mask and pick up a scythe. Man, if we draw a women like that. Why are you looking at me like that guys? Don’t tell me you’ve never thought of it before. No? Really? Oh.
Thanks to CSA!
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Tagged with: bladed weapons • cleavage • death • Panther Books • Piers Anthony • scythe • Tarot Trilogy series • Unknown Artist Institute
Nov 30
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I’ve heard on the grapevine that science fiction slash fantasy readers only want one thing. Naked women! What’s with that, eh? What we need are dudes. The type that make you feel really uncomfortable. No mention of fantasy or anything. Just a dude and… The Quest!
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Tagged with: dude • muscles • Susan Kearney • Tor Books • Unknown Artist Institute • WTF
Nov 24
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You know the two things that make everything look fantastic? Glow and blur. The best photoshop tools money can buy. So we’ll have a glowing blurry tattooed man with a wolves head! And some girl with some glowly blurry transparency around her. Make sure the title is huge and don’t forget to blur what you can.
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Tagged with: anthropomorphism • Darren Hopes • fairies • glow • HarperCollins Books • magic • Melissa Marr • once you see it • strange creature • tattoo you • Unknown Artist Institute • wolf • wolf people
Nov 23
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OH OH OH! Let’s have a half naked man grasping his magic electrified sword around waist height. That sounds suggestive? Of course it is, he’s holding a sword right next to his baby maker. A ha ha ha. Don’t forget to overload the whole cover with text, a lot of text, in all shapes and sizes.
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Tagged with: Alyssa Day • Berkley Books • bladed weapons • dude • electricity • font problems • magic • muscles • sixpack abs • sword • Unknown Artist Institute • Warriors of Poseidon series
Nov 20
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You know what you thought? You thought, you’d seen everything anyone could possibly do with a dragon. Well, you’re wrong. Three words for you to eat today, ‘Dragons In Space’! Oh yes, and trying to decipher the controls of a space ship! I mean, dragons can read, right?
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Tagged with: Anne McCaffrey • Corgi Books • dragon • planets • space • space ships • Unknown Artist Institute • unknown publisher • WTF
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