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Jun 15

Honourable Mentions 16

25 Comments »

It has been a while since we’ve had an Honourable Mention post, so following are some of the recent doozies that didn’t meet our strict, fiercely-enforced rules for cover submissions. Enjoy!

Doctor PooClick for larger image

Leah Comments: I know it’s a tie-in, but this is definitely worthy of an Honorable Mention. That lettering is not actually black, it is bright orange metallic foil. I think it says a great deal that the picture is an accurate depiction of the featured aliens.

 

 

What's keeping the pyramids from falling off?Click for larger image

Leah Comments: Another Honorable-Mention-worthy tie-in. Working title: ‘Attack of the Fifty-Foot Fop’.

 

I just 'chat' myselfCliquez pour enlever le mouton

Joachim Comments: A French cat woman? There’s so much wrong with this cover.

 

 

A screaming comes across my eyesClick for larger image

Bibliomancer Comments: I don’t think it’s technically science fiction. But Lordy, is this a bad cover.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.08 out of 10)
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Jun 14

Archangel’s Heart

22 Comments »

New Age Cupid is pissedClick for larger image

Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Comments: Hey, lady, you’ve got something in your mouth…no, other side.

Published 2016

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.76 out of 10)
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Jun 13

Tomorrow and Tomorrow

38 Comments »

The Strange Cult of the Straw BoaterClick for full image

Keep on Truckin'Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: It’s a Two-Fer Tuesday – Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow Edition!

#1 No Shoes, No Shirt … No Problem!

#2 Your boyfriend needs to wash his hands first.

Published 1956 and 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.17 out of 10)
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Jun 12

The Last Planet

18 Comments »

Gunfight at the C-3PO.K. CorralClick for larger image

Lillie Awesome Comments: “I’m not going to chicken out this time…I’m going to ask the dreamy Earthman to the Robot Spring Formal…just put it out there…the worst he can say is no, and anyway, I’ve got a lot going for me; he could do way worse…Omigosh omigosh omigosh – here he comes! O.k., just be cool…”

Published 1955

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.94 out of 10)
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Jun 08

Alien Horizons

26 Comments »

More like ... makes a permanent dent in our eyeballsClick for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Hey taxi! Get me off this cover.

Published 1974

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.06 out of 10)
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Jun 07

Sword-Dancer

34 Comments »

The Mother of all CapesClick for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Fun fact. For some reason I am reminded that he Latin word for “sword sheath” is vagina.

Published 1986

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.27 out of 10)
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Jun 06

The Thorn Boy

15 Comments »

The Jack of Clubs in a poorly-painted deck of playing cardsClick for larger image

Tracy Comments: Figure drawing class? Who needs that?

Published 2002

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.50 out of 10)
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Jun 05

Exiles’ Return

45 Comments »

Neo-Jesus here! Which one of you stiffs is Lazarus?Click for larger image

Leah Comments: Another beaut from my personal collection. Fairly good book, but the protagonists (human woman and psychic alien cat) don’t look like that. First, I’ve never seen a living, healthy adult human being with such a tiny head. Second, they’re both pregnant in this volume of the series. No sign of that here. Also, the text never says anything about the cat having a double chin.

Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.44 out of 10)
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Jun 01

The Metaconcert

31 Comments »

I never Metaconcert I didn't likeClick for full image

William Comments: Here is the church … here is the steeple … open the doors … see the Village People!

Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.35 out of 10)
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May 31

Sesso Alieno

33 Comments »

She's like the Mona Lisa of sex robotsClick for sheep removal

Good Show Sir Comments: In response to yesterday’s German Sex-Robot Extravaganza, we’ve just received this Italian submission. One can only imagine what the Japanese are publishing in this genre.

Published 1998

Thanks to Armando for sending this in.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.65 out of 10)
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