Good Show Sir

Jul 01

Don Comments: OK, we’ve seen tons of perms and oodles of mullets on these covers – but I do believe this is the first permed mullet. (Pullet?) Assuming that’s the eponymous Bard whose Tale this is, he’s apparently not the brightest light in the harbor, since he a) agreed to accompany his hairdresser on a thieving expedition from an albino lizard-man (do such things EVER end well?) and b) misunderstood her when she said she wanted him along to carry the loot.
Published 1993

Many thanks to the Don!

(Average: 6.40 out of 10)

Tagged with: a picture within a picture • Baen Books • Bard's Tale Series • bladed weapons • damsel • dude • GOLD! • Larry Elmore • lizard people • lute • magic • Mercedes Lackey • music • once you see it • robes • Ru Emerson • shiny • strange creature • treasure

May 24

The World Swappers

35 Comments »

Out for his morning stroll, John waves to some passers by. Click for full image

Hex Comments: There’s really not much I can say about this one, except that _someone_ in the design process for this book was taking the piss.

Thanks to Hex!

(Average: 7.93 out of 10)

Tagged with: Ace Books • balls • damsel • dude • gun • John Brunner • planets • space ships • WTF

Mar 05

The Unforsaken Hero

27 Comments »

And they told me I wouldn't look good with a mustache. HA! Click for full image

NIPPLES? What’s this obsession with nipples going around at the moment? Well by heck, we will give them so many nipples it will burn their retinas. And semi-naked muscle clad men killing some sort of beast! Now if you thought that wasn’t manly enough, we’ll give them all tashes!

(Average: 8.07 out of 10)

Tagged with: bladed weapons • dude • Hiero Desteen series • itsh shean connery • loincloth • muscles • Richard Clifton-Dey • Speedos • Sterling E. Lanier • sword • weird delts

Jan 21

Behold the Man

30 Comments »

And everyone thought Jesus was a man... he was but a humble blob. Click for full image

Nothing sells books better than Jesus! Just look at the sales of the Bible, top seller every year. So we’ll have three crosses on a hill, that’s the Jesus part. Then some guy kneeling next to a bleeding fleshy cocoon, that’s the sci-fi part. With this cover, we’re fulfilling the prophecy! Just kidding, now get me more coffee!

(Average: 5.82 out of 10)

Tagged with: blob of awesomeness • cross • egg • Jim Burns • Michael Moorcock • neo-jesus • Orion Books • SF Masterworks • WTF

Aug 28

Chicks ‘n Chained Males

22 Comments »

GAHHHHH give me back Dave from accounting or I will kill you! Click for full image

So with a title like this, one has to be careful. I was thinking of a sweeping landscape and a storm brewing on the horizon. Silhouetted over the coming clouds and setting sun would be some hands in chains and…… Sorry? You just want busty sword welding chicks and a chained male. Ha! Who would approve that?

(Slightly breaks our rules as this is probably comedy – but it is another bank holiday weekend for UK readers! Have fun!)

(Average: 6.14 out of 10)

Tagged with: Baen Books • bladed weapons • bracers • Chicks In Chainmail series • cleavage • cloaks • damsel • Esther Friesner • font problems • inadequate armor • jeans and a t-shirt • Larry Elmore • loincloth • omnibus • once you see it • shields • sword

Aug 20

Reader and Raelynx

17 Comments »

I hope you know how long it took us to prefect this pose! Click for full image

Look I know it’s unusual but I want an actual lynx. It doesn’t stand up like a human, it doesn’t hold some sort of laser rifle, nor does it appear from a space ship. I just want it pouncing across the cover with a princely guy in a white cape leaping with it, while he grasps his sword. That’s not as cheesy right?

(Average: 4.63 out of 10)

Tagged with: Ace Books • bladed weapons • castle • cloaks • daggers • Donato Giancola • leap • lynx • moon • Sharon Shinn • strange creature • Twelve Houses series